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Story Of The Penny- Why Every Broken Soul Deserves A Chance To Be Mended

Story Of The Penny- Why Every Broken Soul Deserves A Chance To Be Mended

Believe it or not, every thing has a story. Some stories are never told and others are never heard. But are they never told because someone dismisses them as insignificant and are they never heard because we don’t take the time to listen?

So, let me start by telling you a story about the penny in the picture above. On a recent Friday morning, I was on my typical morning walk around my neighborhood and was just about a half mile from home when I saw something shiny laying in the street.  But I walked right past it.  Then, something told me to turn around and take a closer look. As I knelt down to see exactly what caught my eye (I don’t wear my contacts on my walk), I realized that it was a simple penny. Or was it so simple?

Without warning, I began to see the correlation between the penny and anyone of us. I was flooded with questions I never even thought about regarding any other means of currency. But something told me there was more to this coin… I felt the dirt and grim against my fingertips and began to relate that to how sometimes our lives are messy.  I saw the scratches as scars from the rough elements, the dents and chips as pieces of our lives where we have lost loved ones, the unworthiness of being found by the side of the road mirror our own feelings of being discarded and tossed aside as if we meant nothing.  No one seemed to care.  No one seemed to pay attention.  No one wanted to know.

But then I saw something else in this crummy looking coin. I saw worthiness. I was drawn by its glimmer and brilliance. Quite simply, it shined. It shined on that darkened street, far from any street light to add to its natural born beauty. Beneath the filth and the imperfectness of its shape, it still dazzled me with its copper appearance and I knew that there was more to it and no one else was here to tell that story.

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So, now you know.

As I carried that penny home in my pocket, I thought about all of the other broken souls that never get a chance to be spoken for or heard. I started asking myself questions: Haven’t we all been broken at one time or another? Who of us have not suffered heartbreak or made a mistake we wish we could undo? What would it take to mend a broken soul?

Why does every broken soul deserve a chance to be mended?

Because we have all been broken.

Our souls can endure quite a bit of pain, but eventually we will break.  We will have been kicked enough times that getting back up just doesn’t seem worth it anymore.  No one in this world ever escapes pain, loss, or rejection.

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Because we are all worth something.

Even a dirty penny has value.  To some, that value may be insignificant.  But to others, it may mean more than ever thought possible. Sometimes, we don’t even see how we glow until someone else points it out to us.

Because we all make mistakes.

We are human and therefore, we have our flaws.  Our emotions can get the better of us and some of our choices will backfire, no matter how good our intentions might be.  But regardless, we are not perfect and forgiveness is the only way to let go of misgivings.

Because we believe in the good of others.

It is in our nature to be honest and good, so being anything less takes much more effort. Only when actions have been taken do we understand and appreciate the “benefit of the doubt” given to us all.

Because we have carry hope within our hearts.

If we really did not believe in tomorrow, then why forgive?  Why chase a dream?  Why pick ourselves back up?  Why do anything more than anyone else?  Because we all need hope — some of us just see it better than others.  It is up to the ones who see it best to share it with everyone else. Now that I shared this story with you, I wonder what you will do next. How will you use this story of a grimy penny found on a dark street in the early hours of the morning and look at the world just a little differently?

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Will you show more compassion than you have previously to the ones who you had looked down upon before?

Will you extend your hand to those who need a hand hold as they gather the strength to once again stand on their own?

Will you offer forgiveness in circumstances that might otherwise seem unforgivable?

Will you unconditionally give to strangers with your time and talents, letting it impact you in ways never imagined?

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Will you set aside differences and agree that living is always better than the alternative?

Will you take the time to tell the stories that need to be told and listen to the ones that need to be heard?

Every broken soul deserves a chance to be mended and it is up to us to to make sure it happens.

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Michelle A. Homme

Author, Speaker, Quote Writer, Empowerment Coach

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

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  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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