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50 Small Things You Can Do Every Day to Really Love Yourself

50 Small Things You Can Do Every Day to Really Love Yourself

When we love ourselves, it helps us feel our best, and when we feel our best, we can give more to the world. Treating yourself well, and with love, is more than eating healthy and exercising.

What exactly is self-love, though? In Psychology Today, Deborah Khoshaba, Psy.D. writes, “Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth. Self-love is dynamic; it grows by actions that mature us.”

She explains the profound effects of self-love, stating, “When we act in ways that expand self-love in us, we begin to accept much better our weaknesses as well as our strengths, have less need to explain away our short-comings, have compassion for ourselves as human beings struggling to find personal meaning, are more centered in our life purpose and values, and expect living fulfillment through our own efforts.”

I’m on a mission to empower people to spend their lives focused on their purpose, priorities, and passions, and to get rid of the junk that gets in the way of living the life of their dreams. Part of living the life you dream of is practicing self-love. Self-love is incredibly important in many areas of your life. It influences how high you set your goals, how you let others treat you, and how you react to difficult situations. Self-love affects how you treat your body, how you manage stress, and your ability to live consistently with your values.

Here are 50 small things you can do every day to practice self-love. I divided them into categories of the 7 Dimensions of Wellness, so you can practice self-love in all areas of wellbeing.

Social wellness

Social wellness is the ability to connect with others and develop positive relationships. To practice self-love in your social life, do the following:

1. Connect today with someone who is positive, inspiring, and encouraging.

2. Visit with your neighbor.

3. Send a note in the mail to a family member or friend.

4. Plan a fun night out with friends.

5. Snuggle with your love.

Emotional wellness

Emotional wellness is the ability to cope with life’s challenges. The University of California states,”The ability to acknowledge and share feelings of anger, fear, sadness or stress, hope, love, joy and happiness in a productive manner” contributes to increased emotional wellness. To practice self-love in this area, work on the following:

6. If you’re not satisfied with your life, admit it to yourself, and write out your action plan to make changes.

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7. Spend 10 minutes today being quiet.

8. Forgive yourself. You must accept that you are not perfect before you can love yourself.

9. Seek the help you need — set up an appointment for counselling or therapy if you’re struggling emotionally. You are worth it.

10. Spend 10 minutes working on a favorite stress-management technique.

11. Write down your schedule for the day. This will help you set aside time each day to spend time on your priorities and minimize wasted time.

12. Practice an optimistic attitude.

13. Be mindful of your inner dialogue. The messages you tell yourself can greatly influence your life.

14. Set boundaries on how you’ll spend your time. Steer clear of time-sucking activities that don’t add meaning to your life.

16. Turn away from behaviors that tend to get you into trouble.

17. Say no to toxic people and activities.

18. Say yes to adventure.

19. Have fun. Laugh every day.

20. Compliment yourself.

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Spiritual wellness

The University of California describes spiritual wellness as “the ability to establish peace and harmony in our lives.” To practice self-love in your spiritual life, take these actions:

21. Explore your faith.

22. Spend time in prayer or meditation.

23. Seek an opportunity to grow in one of the challenges in your life.

24. Get outside in nature.

25. Do something altruistic.

Environmental wellness

Being environmentally well means recognizing your responsibility to make a positive impact on the earth. To practice self-love and environmental wellness, try these tips:

26. Practice not buying what you don’t need.

27. Donate items you don’t need. Practice getting rid of 1 item per day.

Occupational wellness

Occupational wellness involves getting fulfillment from your work. To practice self-love in your work life, take these steps:

28. Learn about your strengths.

29. Discover your passion. This workbook is a great start.

30. Write down your big career goals.

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31. Take one small step each day toward your dream career.

32. Connect with a coworker.

Intellectual wellness

When you are intellectually well, you continually expand your knowledge as a lifelong learner. To practice self-love intellectually, try these actions:

33. Read 1 page of a book that interests you today.

34. Learn.

35. Book an adventure to a new place.

36. Sign up for a new class through community education or a local college.

37. Take a small step out of your comfort zone every day.

Physical wellness

Optimal physical wellness is achieved when you have a healthy quality of life. To practice self-love and increase physical wellness, try these actions:

38. Appreciate the amazing things your body can do rather than focusing on what you consider to be your “flaws.”

39. Schedule your routine physical with your doctor.

40. Pick a new vegetable to eat.

41. Choose one new healthy recipe to make this week.

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42. While you eat, focus on your meal.

43. Make a specific game plan to quit a destructive habit.

44. Nourish your body with healthy choices.

45. Establish a nighttime routine for a healthy dose of sleep.

A few bonuses

46. Set aside time each day to work toward making a big dream of yours a reality. Guard this time furiously.

47. Do something you love every day.

48. Buy yourself fresh flowers someday soon, just for fun.

49. Schedule a massage.

50. Start a gratitude journal and list something you are thankful for every day.

When you start working on these small actions, you’ll begin to accept and appreciate yourself more. When you genuinely love yourself and love life, it causes amazing effects in your life and in the lives of those around you.

Thanks for reading. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Feel free to email me at [email protected] and tell me one step you’ll take today to practice self-love. Always remember, you are enough and you are worth it.

Featured photo credit: Take Back Your Health Conference 2015 Los Angeles/Take Back Your Health Conference’s Photostream via flickr.com

More by this author

Dr. Kerry Petsinger

Entrepreneur, Mindset & Performance Coach, & Doctor of Physical Therapy

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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