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Last Updated on July 4, 2019

15 Signs Of Self-Absorbed People

15 Signs Of Self-Absorbed People

No one likes a self-absorbed person- at least most people I know don’t. Self-absorbed people do portray certain patterns that are similar to narcissistic people, and getting close to such people can hurt your self-esteem.

However realizing certain elements that define their character can make us more prepared for dealing with them.

Here are 15 signs of self-absorbed people:

1. They are always on the defensive.

They do not see the world from another person’s eyes. They would rather see it from theirs and protect their flaws and image with everything they’ve got.

2. They don’t see the big picture.

A self-absorbed person thinks the world is just about them. Thus, the world, from their point of view, is a place comprising them and perhaps a few persons around them who they can control. How the world affects other people really doesn’t concern them.

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3. They are imposing.

They frequently use words like “should” or “must.” They want to dominate in any relationship because they see relationships as a tool for getting what they want and making themselves the center of attention.

4. They feel insecure sometimes.

They are not complete. They always have a missing gap in their world. And you may be the person they try to use to fill those gaps.

5. They always think they are superior to others.

They are so consumed by their own world and self image that it is near impossible for other people to measure up to their standards. They maintain a superiority complex that most commonly leads to them devaluing others.

6. They consider friendships a tool for getting what they want.

Don’t assume that they are overly concerned with the friendship that they have with you. This is why they have so many friends and are not overly concerned with the number of friends they have: they view friends as tools for getting what they want.

7. They are extremely opinionated.

It is always about their opinions. They do not want to consider the opinions of others; due to their self-absorption they are consumed by their own point of view, self-image, desires and preferences.

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8. They do not have long lasting relationships.

Since their relationships are built around the idea of quantity and using people as tools to get what they want, they do not have long lasting relationships or quality ones.

9. They do not have a real sense of empathy.

Since their display of sympathy or compassion is usually conditional, it is difficult for them to understand the depth of true empathy or what this concept really means.

10. They hide their insecurities behind a cloak of success.

The truth is that no matter what sort of success they have, they will always feel inadequate internally. While they may appear successful or confident based on appearances and external achievements, internally, they have fears relating to self-esteem.

11. They devalue others.

Constructive criticism is okay, but self-absorbed people always take criticism too far and use it as a weapon to allow them to devalue others.

12. They can be arrogant.

This is because they feel they are so important and better than every other person. A self-absorbed person can often be egotistical.

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13. They hide who they are.

They will present the best and most captivating part of their personality to you. As they are so self-absorbed, they do not want you to see the hidden elements that make them feel secretly insecure. This can lead to them coming across as pretentious and them failing to be vulnerable in relationships.

14. They are extremely selfish.

Every human is selfish. But there are certain occasions when you have to make exceptions and take actions without expecting anything in return. This is not so for the self-absorbed person.

15. They think they are great and the world out there is wrong.

They do not self-heal. If they have been hurt, they would rather rebuke the world for this rather than self-heal.

For the self-absorbed person, the problem is either “you” or the “other”- never “me”. Most of the time, it will seem like no form of self-healing or therapy would suit them as they are focused on all the wrongs the world has done to them, never accepting any responsibility.

When you recognize the above signs, consider that you may be dealing with a self-absorbed person- or you may be one yourself.

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And if you realize that you’re actually one, it’s never too late to change. You can work on your mindset and start to improve your relationships with yourself and others: How to Build Self Esteem (A Guide to Realize Your Hidden Power)

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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