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10 Secrets Of Charming, Irresistible People

10 Secrets Of Charming, Irresistible People

Being irresistible is no easy task, but what is it that sets the irresistible people around us apart from the rest of the pack? We all know that there is something special about these people, but often we can’t quite put our finger on it. Although good looks don’t hurt, being irresistibly charming involves something special on the inside. There are a few secrets that irresistibly charming, learn how to adopt them today.

1. Anyone can be irresistible

Irresistible people may seem like they have special gifts that allow them to seduce and influence anyone they meet, but in fact, they have many “secrets” that they have learned over their lifespan that allow them to attract others and get what they want. Perhaps the greatest secret of all is that anyone can be irresistible. Charm, charisma, and magnetism are all skills that you can develop over time no matter who you are today.Keep a goal of becoming more irresistible in mind and soon enough you will adopt habits that make you so.

2. Body language shows you are interested

Body language is just one of the skills that irresistible people have usually mastered. While most of us give little thought into the way we carry ourselves, how much we smile, when we make eye contact, and how we maintain our posture, an irresistible people knows how to carry themselves with the right body language.  they know exactly how important these things are in the way that other people perceive them. Things like facing people when they speak to you, standing or sitting up straight, and placing your arms relaxed at your sides can all convey interest and let people know that you want to know what they have to say.

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Some basics of body language skills include smiling, eye contact, and posturing. A smile makes people feel welcomed, happy, and accepted. Just smiling at anyone we meet can quickly boost or personal magnetism. Giving people eye contact conveys confidence, trustworthiness, and respect, and just by maintaining appropriate eye contact with others we can increase greatly enhance their perception of us.

3. Vocal skills are valuable

Have you ever heard a voice that quickly caught your attention, or listened to someone speak who had you mesmerized by the warmth of their words?  Irresistible people are often masters of vocal skills like resonance, timing, and proper use of emotion in their speech.Resonance refers to the skill of speaking in way that resonates through your entire body. Resonance can be achieved by standing up straight, opening your nasal passages, and trying to make each word form deep in your chest. By opening up our bodies and speaking through our chests, we can create a much richer and warmer sound with our voice. You can even try humming to understand the way it feels to have sound in your chest.

Timing in speech means using things like pauses to regroup, repeated words to emphasize, or even asking questions to increase engagement or allow for thought on a subject. Timing of your words and speech can help you keep people engaged, attracted, interested, or even amused. In addition, demonstrating emotion in our words we can help covey any emotion that we wish to show to the person we are speaking with.By using and showing our emotions through speech we can help draw closer to the people we interact with and form deeper connections.

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4. Empathy is a bridge to being irresistible

When you show how much you care about another person’s perspective, it makes you more charming to them. One of the ways you can made the most genuine of connections to to practice empathy by putting yourself in their shoes to understand their thoughts, emotions, and actions. By truly considering another person’s view, we can create strong bonds between ourselves and other people. Many people simply wont take the time to think about others, so just making people feel understood will go a long way towards increasing your own irresistibility.

5. Great listening skills draw people in.

Have you ever met someone that was an excellent listener? When someone opens up to you and listens to each word you say, it draws you out of your shell and into the open. People naturally will be compelled to share more with you, tell you more stories, and open up emotionally if they feel you are truly interested in what they say, but in order for this to work, you must actually care about what the person is saying. Interest really can’t be feigned, so actually find something to be interested about and listen intently.

6. Confidence is attractive

No matter what the situation, people will always be attracted to a confident person.  In bad situations people look to leaders who are confident enough to lead through challenge, and in good times people look towards confident people to encourage growth and creative thinking. Confidence makes other people feel secure, unchallenged, and encouraged, and all of these emotions will increase the desire of others to be around you.

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7. First impression is everything

A first impression can determine the entire future of events. It may not seem fair, but oftentimes, the first few moments we spend with someone will create the perception of who we are to another person. A bad first impression can take years to overcome as everything we do is seen through that bad interpretation of us. When creating a first impression, using other skills like smiling, making eye contact, and showing interest increases your level of charm.

8. You must be able to adapt to any situation.

The truly irresistible among us know how to attract others no matter the time or place. Whether it is a crowded bar, a workplace, or park, they know how to demonstrate a calm confidence, warmth, and the proper emotions for each individual situation.  You must carry yourself very differently at a job interview than you would on the beach on spring break, and irresistible people know how to blend in just enough to stand out. Adaptability and knowing how to read a situation makes you the most charming you can be in every situation.

9. You must be authentic and you must be yourself.

Irresistibility is often a byproduct of people being unique and different.  People are often attracted to others who display creative thoughts or think outside of the box.  Creativity and individuality are highly celebrated traits in the world, and the most irresistible people are those who embrace who they are and let it shine. Don’t act like someone you aren’t when your individuality is something to make you memorable and special in your own way.

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10. You should always find ways to relate to people.

Irresistible people know how to relate to others, and how to do it well.  When people are held in too high of esteem, they can often seem distant and indifferent, but true magnetism often occurs when you can make people feel like you are like them.  The more things someone feels they have in common with you, the more attracted to you they will become, and irresistible people know how to find common ground between many different people. No matter how different a person may be to you, finding commonalities is important in creating a solid foundation.

Featured photo credit: Michael Carian- Youmacon People via flickr.com

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Last Updated on September 24, 2020

17 Ways Learn New Skills Faster and Enjoy the Process

17 Ways Learn New Skills Faster and Enjoy the Process

In the movie The Matrix, everyone was intrigued with the ability that Neo and his friends possessed to learn new skills in a matter of seconds. With the incredible rise in technology today, the rapid learning in the movie is becoming much more of a reality than you realize.

The current generation has access to more knowledge and information than any before it. Through the internet, we are able to access all sorts of knowledge to answer almost every conceivable question. To become smarter, it’s more about the ability to learn faster, rather than being a natural born genius.

Here are 17 ways to kickstart your Matrix-style learning experience in a short amount of time.

1. Deconstruct and Reverse Engineer

Break down the skill that you want to learn into little pieces and learn techniques to master an isolated portion. The small pieces will come together to make up the whole skill.

For example, when you’re learning to play the guitar, learn how to press down a chord pattern with your fingers first without even trying to strum the chord. Once you are able to change between a couple of chord patterns, then add the strumming.

2. Use the Pareto Principle

Use the Pareto Principle, which is also known as the 80 20 rule. Identify the 20% of the work that will give you 80% of the results. Find out more about the 80 20 rule here: What Is the 80 20 Rule (And How to Use It to Boost Productivity)

Take learning a new language for example. It does not take long to realize that some words pop up over and over again as you’re learning. You can do a quick search for “most commonly used French words,” for example, and begin to learn them first before adding on the rest.

3. Make Stakes

Establish some sort of punishment for not learning the skill that you are seeking. There are sites available that allow you to make a donation toward a charity you absolutely hate if you do not meet your goals. Or you can place a bet with a friend to light that fire under you.

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However, keep in mind that several studies have shown that rewards tend to be more motivating than punishment[1].

4. Record Yourself

Seeing yourself on video is a great way to learn from your mistakes and identify areas that you need to improve. This is very effective for any musicians, actors, speakers, performers, and dancers.

5. Join a Group

There are huge benefits to learning in a group. Not only are you able to learn from others but you’ll be encouraged to make progress together. Whether it’s a chess club, a mastermind group, or an online meet-up group, get connected with other like-minded individuals.

6. Time Travel

Visit the library. Although everything is moving more and more online, there are still such things called libraries.

Whether it’s a municipal library or your university library, you will be amazed at some of the books available there that are not accessible online. Specifically, look for the hidden treasures and wisdom contained in the really old books.

7. Be a Chameleon

When you want to learn new skills, imitate your biggest idol. Watch a video and learn from seeing someone else do it. Participate in mimicry and copy what you see.

Studies have shown that, apart from learning,[2]

“Mimicry is an effective tool not only to create ties and social relationships, but also for maintaining them.”

Visual learning is a great way to speed up the learning process. YouTube has thousands of videos on almost every topic available.

8. Focus

Follow one course until success! It’s easy to get distracted, to throw in the towel, or to become interested in the next great thing and ditch what you initially set out to do.

Ditch the whole idea of multitasking, as it has been shown to be detrimental and unproductive Simply focus on the one new skill at hand until you get it done.

9. Visualize

The mind has great difficulty distinguishing between what is real and what is imagined. That is why athletes practice mentally seeing their success before attempting the real thing[3].

Visualize yourself achieving your new skill and each step that you need to make to see results. This is an important skill to help when you’re learning the basics or breaking a bad habit.

Take a look at this article to learn how to do so: How to Become a Person Who Can Visualize Results

10. Find a Mentor

Success leaves clues. The best short cut to become an expert is to find an expert and not have to make the mistakes that they have made.

Finding out what NOT to do from the expert will fast-track your learning when you want to learn new skills. It is a huge win to have them personally walk you through what needs to be done. Reach out and send an email to them.

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If you need help learning how to find a mentor, check out this article.

11. Sleep on It

Practice your new skill within four hours of going to sleep.

Josh Kaufman, author of The Personal MBA, is a noted rapid learning expert. He says that any practice done within this time frame causes your brain to embed the learning more rapidly into its neural pathways. Your memory and motor-mechanics are ingrained at a quicker level.

12. Use the 20-Hour Rule

Along with that tip, Kaufman also suggests 20 as the magic number of hours to dedicate to learning the new skill.

His reasoning is that everyone will hit a wall early on in the rapid learning stage and that “pre-committing” to 20 hours is a sure-fire way to push through that wall and acquire your new skill.[4]

Check out his video to find out more:

13. Learn by Doing

It’s easy to get caught up in reading and gathering information on how to learn new skills and never actually get around to doing those skills. The best way to learn is to do.

Regardless of how unprepared you feel, make sure you are physically engaged continuously. Keep alternating between research and practice.

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14. Complete Short Sprints

Rather than to force yourself into enduring hours upon hours of dedication, work in short sprints of about 20-30 minutes, then get up and stretch or take a short walk. Your brain’s attention span works best with short breaks, so be sure to give it the little rest it needs.

One study found that, between two groups of students, the students who took two short breaks when studying actually performed better than those who didn’t take breaks[5].

15. Ditch the Distractions

Make sure the environment you are in is perfect for your rapid-learning progress. That means ditching any social media, and the temptation to check any email. As the saying goes, “Out of sight, out of mind.”

Before you sit down to learn new skills, make sure that potential distractions are far from sight.

16. Use Nootropics

Otherwise known as brain enhancers, these cognitive boosters are available in natural herbal forms and in supplements.

Many students will swear by the increased focus that nootropics will provide[6], particularly as they get set for some serious cramming. Natural herbal nootropics have been used for thousands of years in Ayurvedic traditions to improve the mind and learning.

Find out more about brain supplements in this article.

17. Celebrate

For every single small win that you experience during the learning process, be sure to celebrate. Your brain will release endorphins and serotonin as you raise your hands in victory and pump your fits. Have a piece of chocolate and give yourself a pat on the back. This positive reinforcement will help you keep pushing forward as you learn new skills.

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The Bottom Line

Learning a new skill should be exciting and fun. Whether you use online courses, real world experience, YouTube videos, or free online resources, take time to learn in the long term. Keep picturing the joy of reaching the end goal and being a better version of yourself as continual motivation.

More Tips on How to Learn New Skills

Featured photo credit: Elijah M. Henderson via unsplash.com

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