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10 Reasons Engineers Make Good Partners

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10 Reasons Engineers Make Good Partners

Ahh engineers. They are a breed of their own. Some of the smartest people out there, combined with a personality that can be confusing at first, if you are a free spirit, fly by the seat of your pants type like me. But once you understand them, you realize there are major pluses to having one as your partner.

1. They are extremely organized

It’s no secret that engineers tend to be somewhat particular about where their things go. They like to have easy access, up-to-date technology, working solutions, and organization in their world. Perhaps their idea of organization is not the same as yours, but being with an engineer means respecting their ways, as intruding in their system can be disruptive to their balance and ability to be productive. And you will enjoy leading an organized life with your loved one.

2. They know how to handle high-pressure and stressful situations well

Engineers encounter a lot of high stress situations at work, and they know they can’t lose their minds. This is actually a great thing for you if you are the partner of this logical type, because that means he or she won’t join you on the emotional rollercoaster, and instead be a calming force in the relationship.

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3. They absorb information quickly

Men and women in the engineering profession acquire acute attention to detail. Not only does this mean they will want that specific type of cheese and will go to the store late at night just to get it, it also means they will remember special dates, things you said, small details, and be extremely thoughtful when in a relationship. They won’t necessarily show it in the lovey-dovey way – but they will remember to get you that one thing for your birthday you mentioned briefly months ago, and not even make a big fuss about it.

4. They make amazing teachers

Engineers have the ability to take a lot of information, and condense it into a few words. Working with a lot of data everyday, they have to categorize what’s important and what’s not, since prioritizing their efforts and energy is of the utmost importance when focusing on a project. This translates into their relationships as well. If you are lucky to be dating an engineer, or married to one like me, your household will not be one of many words, but the words will be very meaningful.

5. They have no problem committing to someone, or to something

Engineers are some of the most dedicated people, and they will work on one thing until it’s perfect. Committing to such a demanding career shows that they are not short-sighted, and this can translate to how they view their personal relationships as well. They don’t like to waste time with too many relationships, and would rather have more serious, quality partnerships. Quality over quantity can ring very true with this group.

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6. They are actually very creative

The myth that engineers are math nerds could not be further from the truth. Engineers actually have to be very creative to come up with solutions for impossible problems on a daily basis. This sort of creativity requires a lot of brain power however, so many engineers blow off steam by doing something else creative, like playing an instrument, painting, or working on a “fun” project that tunes their ever-thinking brain out. Your home will never be a boring place.

7. They have the ability to think logically, think ahead, and make a plan

Being with an engineer means you always have a plan. Whether it’s for the weekend, your next trip, your meals, your future, or your finances. Sometimes it can be difficult to keep up with their level of brain organization, but you can rest assured that you are ultimately safe, and do not have to worry about a thing.

8. They are not lazy

Engineers never really rest. Even on their days “off”, they continue to engineer away in their mind. They may put off a project for a while to let the solution come to them, but they don’t give up and rarely get discouraged. They know there will be a solution – they just have to find it. This makes them incredible partners because they are willing to put work into solving your relationship problems until there is resolution.

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9. They have a lot of initiative, and re-engineer everyday problems to find better, more functional solutions

This does mean that you will find their “solutions” around the house. Solutions for leaky pipes, or solutions for the neighbor’s cat who keeps leaving presents in your lawn. Nevertheless, they solve everyday problems themselves, without having to call a professional. You can trust that if your house is flooding and the roof is on fire, they will figure something out.

10. They have an impressive ability to admit mistakes and re-work their approach

Because their work can require a lot of trial and error, engineers learn to rethink their strategies constantly. This translates nicely into relationships, as it makes them more likely to examine a behavior that may not be producing very good results (and making you mad), and look for ways to change it to achieve better results.

If you are lucky to have found yourself one of these gems, celebrate their qualities, appreciate their talents, show that you see how hard they work, and most of all, enjoy the perks of having such a thoughtful partner!

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Featured photo credit: Nathan Fertig via stocksnap.io

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Last Updated on November 18, 2021

10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

  • honest
  • reliable
  • competent
  • kind and compassionate
  • capable of taking the blame
  • able to persevere
  • modest and humble
  • pacific and can control anger.

The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

“The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

Abigail Van Buren

3. How does this person take the blame?

Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

5. Read their emails.

Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

  • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
  • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
  • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
  • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
  • Too many question marks can show anger
  • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

6. Watch out for the show offs.

Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

8. Their empathy score is high.

Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

“One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

Stendhal

 10. Avoid toxic people.

These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

  • Envy or jealousy
  • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
  • Complaining about their own lack of success
  • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
  • Obsession with themselves and their problems

Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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