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15 Trustworthy Techniques to Prevent Relationship Problems

15 Trustworthy Techniques to Prevent Relationship Problems

One of the most exciting times is the feeling of entering into a new romantic relationship with someone. You can’t get enough of the other person as the two of you are floating on cloud nine.

Unfortunately, this period commonly known as the honeymoon phase is just that. It’s a phase.

Small things start to surface where you notice the other person isn’t perfect. And as the relationship continues on, you run into disagreements, arguments and you even hurt each other both intentionally and unintentionally.

So how is it that long term happy couples continue to be happy with each other despite all these challenges that come with time? If you’ve been running into setbacks with your relationship, here are 15 techniques you can use with your partner that the happiest couples use to prevent relationship problems.

1. Cultivate connection by creating a safe space for each other

When a person who you care about points out a flaw or shares something s/he’s unhappy with you about, your fear of getting hurt makes you prone to getting defensive. You may feel the need to protect yourself, which can lead to behaviors such as shutting your partner out, keeping secrets and being inauthentic. This is why it’s important during times of conflict that the both of you feel safe to have the conversation.

When you cultivate a relationship where you and your partner feel safe, the two of you are able to share sensitive things with each other without any judgement or condemnation. As a result, genuine connection occurs.

What to do?

Don’t forget to remind your partner during times of conflict that you are on the same side. This helps frame the conversation that the goal is more about collaboratively figuring out how to solve the challenge together rather than trying to prove who’s right or wrong. Doing this helps couples to put their walls down.

When your partner shares something vulnerable with you, don’t ask questions that start with “Why”. Instead, try asking the questions “What happened?”. Questions that start with “Why” automatically triggers your brain to go on the defensive. For example, instead of asking “Why would you do that?” you can ask “What happened that caused you to do that?”

Pay attention to your non-verbal language that may be preventing your partner from feeling safe to share with you. Avoid crossing your arms, being distracted by looking elsewhere or scowling. Instead, relax your body, maintain eye contact and give your undivided attention.

2. Engage in both emotions and actions during conflicts

One common occurrence seen in many relationships is one partner will usually try to fix the conflict by offering solutions while the other wants to simply be comforted because of the emotion she is feeling.

One hilarious yet accurate illustration of this situation can be seen in this skit “It’s Not About the Nail.”

Many relationships struggle because each partner tends to focus on half the picture when it comes to conflict resolution.

There is a part of your brain that helps you reason and use logical thinking and there’s a part of your brain that feels emotions. What’s important to know is when one is caught up in the emotional brain, the thinking part of your brain temporary shuts down. This means conflict resolution skills like critical thinking, logical reasoning, and empathy are temporarily turned off.

This is why we often make irrational decisions and do things we regret when we are emotional. It’s also why it’s hard to listen to reason or solutions being thrown at you when you are experiencing intense emotions.

In order to effectively resolve tough issues with your partner, you must connect with the other’s emotional state first to calm it down in order to reactivate the thinking part of her brain. By doing so, both of you are now on the same wavelength and in a better place to come up with solutions together.

What to do?

Challenging conflicts almost always begin in the emotional side of the brain. When your partner shares an upsetting issue with you, it’s important to respond with your emotional brain first.

First listen to your partner and get into a habit of reflecting back to confirm how she is feeling while being careful not to be condescending or talking down.

For example, when your partner tells you about something that upset her, before letting your mental reflexes spurt out advice, you can simply say something like “Wow, that sucks, I don’t blame you for being angry about that. I’d be too if that happened to me.” It may feel weird to say things like this in the beginning but as you do it more, it’ll feel more natural to you and comforting for your partner.

Once your partner feels felt, then it’s time to see if she’s open to redirecting the conversation to brainstorm how to solve the problem while using the thinking side of the brain.

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3. Name your emotions when speaking with each other

As simple as this sounds, it’s important to put into words how you are feeling. The challenge however, is that while your partner can hear about your feelings when you speak, it’s often hard to have him actually feel what you are feeling. In order to be able to help your partner feel the same emotions, you need to tell the story behind it.

People feel what you feel through your stories. When you honestly recount the events of what happened to you when you’ve had a bad day or something rude someone said to you, it helps your partner feel what you are feeling.

There’s actually a double benefit to openly sharing your stories behind your feelings. It also helps you activate the thinking part of your brain and make sense of what happened. As a result, you have a deeper understanding why you are feeling the way you do, which actually gives you more control to do something to resolve it.

What to do?

When you’re having trouble expressing to your partner how you are feeling, simply unpack the story of what happened to you. As you share, try to name the feelings you were experiencing during the key parts of the story to help you make more sense of what happened.

Instead of saying something like “My boss was such a jerk today,” expand upon it and say “My boss was such a jerk today and it made me so pissed off.” Then proceed to tell the story of what happened.

4. Engage your partner rather than enraging him

A lot of arguments occur because of things that the partner is a repeated offender of. This can be especially frustrating and it can often lead to angry comments that lead down the black hole of hurling hurtful insults at each other.

When you’re annoyed or upset with your partner, making a criticizing comment at him or intentionally pushing his buttons won’t fix the problem. Instead, you’ll just make things worse and end up in an emotional hurricane with each other.

When you have an issue with your partner, it’s important to utilize strategies that help you keep your cool and communicate with him thoughtfully rather than lashing out with anger.

What to do?

Try to refrain from pushing your partners buttons even though it feels like he is intentionally upsetting you. Instead, take a deep breath and bring the conversation back to a more productive one by asking thought provoking questions instead of fighting back.

For example, if your partner won’t clean up after himself no matter how many times you’ve told him to, rather than going down the usual “You’re such a slob!” and upsetting your partner, you can try to engage him to help you figure things out. You can thoughtfully share your frustration and invite him to help you solve the issue.

For example:

“I have to be honest. I’ve been really frustrated with you not helping around the house and it feels like I’m usually cleaning up after you. I find myself picking up your dirty laundry off the floor and scrubbing the counters because it gets so filthy. I’m feeling more like your maid than your spouse. What do you think we can do about this? I’d really appreciate your help.”

5. Don’t dominate the relationship

Once one partner tries to start controlling the other by being commanding and demanding things of her, it becomes an unhealthy relationship.

These kinds of toxic environments restrict partners from being able to be themselves around you. They will often feel like they have to walk on eggshells with you because they’re afraid of upsetting you.

Controlling behavior stems from insecurities and anxiety so if you find yourself or your partner acting this way, it may be important to talk about it and investigate the root cause of the issue.

What to do?

Rather than telling your partner to stop doing something or to do things a certain way, try to encourage conversations about it. If they don’t agree, open it up to alternatives and negotiation. You’ve probably experienced times where when someone just commands you do to things a certain way, it’s often more off-putting than helpful.

Or if it’s the other way around and you’re being the one who’s being commanded, express that you don’t appreciate your partner telling you what to do and that you’d appreciate if they would ask things of you instead of demanding them.

Even though you’re a couple, it’s important to have boundaries and respect each other’s boundaries.

6. Don’t shame each other

Shame is one of the worst emotional pains to experience and it often occurs when someone makes you feel like something is wrong with who your are.

Whether it was getting bullied at school, not meeting up to someone’s expectations or being disregarded when you were opening up, shame makes you go into defense mode and build a wall around yourself and not let anyone in.

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Shame and vulnerability expert Dr. Brene Brown shares:

“Shame, blame, disrespect, betrayal, and the withholding of affection damage the roots from which love grows. Love can only survive these injuries if they are acknowledged, healed and rare.”

During times of intense conflict, some may resort to shaming their partner; doing so creates an unhealthy relationship. Instead, be sure to differentiate that you are unhappy with your partner’s actions as opposed to his character and express that through your words.

What to do?

Don’t use words that shame your partner. Instead, when upset with him, be sure to use words that focus on his actions instead.

For example, take a look at the following two statements:

  1. “I can’t believe you forgot to make it to our son’s game! You’re the worst father ever!”
  2. “I’m really disappointed and upset that you forgot about our son’s game.”

The first statement is attacking his character whereas the second statement expresses your feelings about his actions. The first statement shames your partner, which probably will make him shut down and enter into defense mode whereas the latter opens up conversation to discuss things further and hopefully reconcile.

This subtle difference makes a huge impact and opens up a path towards resolving the conflict instead of further argument.

7. Get moving during times of intense conflict

Psychology expert Dr. Daniel Siegel teaches that when we change our physical state through movement or relaxation, it can actually change our emotional state.[1]

This is why smiling more makes you happier or if you take short shallow breaths, it can make you feel more anxious.[2]

When it comes to helping you with a conflict you are having with your partner, exercise is a great way to calm your emotional brain and helps you regain control of your thinking brain. So the next time you feel like you’re stuck in a stalemate in your argument, take a break and go out for a quick workout session.

What to do?

When you and your partner are going through an intensely emotional and heated argument, consider taking a short break to go for a walk or hop on a bike. Engaging in physical movement will prove beneficial and productive to your conversations.

8. Uncover implicit memories that drive unhealthy behaviors

There are two categories of memory known as explicit and implicit memories:

  • Explicit memories – Events and information that you can consciously remember
  • Implicit memories – Memories that you can feel and experience.

Think of the first time you learned to ride a bike. You can remember placing your hands on the handlebars and your feet on the pedals. Remembering this information is possible because of your explicit memories.

Now let’s say it’s been ten years since you’ve rode a bike but if you hop on one today, you’re able to ride the bike just like you did back then. This is because your implicit memories have kicked in and you remember the feeling of what it was like to ride. You can compare it to something like muscle memory.

When it comes to our relationships, we may engage in unhealthy behaviors because of our implicit memories. They can cause us to react to certain things in an unhealthy way.

If you’ve been cheated on by a previous partner, your implicit memory of the pain can cause you to develop an overwhelming need to always know where your current partner is. You may find yourself stalking him the moment you aren’t sure of his whereabouts.

I remember being told during a marriage counseling session that “If it’s hysterical, it’s historical.” This rings so true when it comes to the behaviors we have that can hurt a relationship. They are always caused from implicit memories of past experiences.

It’s important to identify these unhealthy behaviors and talk about it with your partner and try to identify the implicit memory behind it. By doing so, you make sense of why such behavior occurs and it helps you regain control over yourself and change the negative behavior into a positive one.

What to do?

If your partner has abnormal behaviors that concern you, introduce the concept of implicit memories to him/her. See if s/he’d be open to exploring what kinds of implicit memories drive certain behaviors that concern you. If the implicit memory is from a serious traumatic event that’s difficult to make sense of, consider going through this process with a professional therapist.

9. Be intentional about having fun

The longer you’ve been in a relationship, the more routines and habits you fall into with each other. In order to keep things fun and enjoyable, it’s important to continually incorporate play into your life.

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Play increases your joy and it’s essential to improving your creativity, problem solving skills and relationships.

A physician and speaker who founded the National Institute for Play, Dr. Bowen White, found through extensive research that playing together has helped couples rekindle their relationships as well as explore other ways to emotionally connect.[3]

“Play helps us connect with other people because we are open in a way that allows them to feel, maybe, this is a safe person to be with and maybe even fun to be around.”

When you play, you let your guard down and loosen up a little, which in turn allows you connect better with others and be more open to being vulnerable.

What to do?

Even though you have a busy schedule, make sure to fit in times that you can play with your partner. Explore and discover new fun things that you can do together or bring back old activities you used to enjoy doing together.

There are many options ranging from something as big as a fancy romantic getaway or as small as sipping some wine and playing a board game together. Whatever helps you smile and laugh together, be sure to incorporate more of it in your relationship because it’s what will help you thrive.

10. Learn how to practice vulnerability

Just like it can be scary being physically naked for the first time in front of someone, it’s even scarier to be emotionally naked. When it comes to relationships, most of us find it frightening to be vulnerable because we have nothing to defend ourselves with if someone were trying to hurt us.

The unfortunate reality is when you get into a relationship, you will get hurt sometimes. The more we get hurt, the harder it is to be vulnerable because we don’t want to experience such pain ever again. This is why it’s a natural reaction to try and defend ourselves during these kinds of moments.

While being vulnerable can leave you open to getting hurt, it’s also the only place that intimacy and genuine connection can ever occur. If you become defensive by projecting yourself as someone other than who you really are, you will never feel truly connected to others because you don’t let them see the real you. You can find more benefits of practicing vulnerability here: 5 Reasons to Embrace Vulnerability

Dr. Brene Brown has conducted thousands of interviews in her research on vulnerability and results have shown that the key attribute of deep connection indeed was vulnerability:

“There can be no intimacy—emotional intimacy, spiritual intimacy, physical intimacy—without vulnerability. One of the reasons there is such an intimacy deficit today is because we don’t know how to be vulnerable. It’s about being honest with how we feel, about our fears, about what we need, and, asking for what we need. Vulnerability is glue that holds intimate relationships together. “

What to do?

Being vulnerable is easier said than done. Here are a few practices you can exercise to help you create the space with you partner to help you create intimate moments:

  • When you’re hurting, ask for what you need.
  • Share your feelings when you communicate.
  • Openly express what you want from your partner rather than talking about things you don’t want.
  • Don’t beat around the bush and be honest with your thoughts.
  • Slow down and take the time to be present.

11. Set up ground rules for arguments

Arguments that get escalated can often lead to hurtful statements that break apart the relationship rather than build it up. Happy couples know how to argue well and they incorporate important skills to resolve their conflicts such as empathy, active listening and speaking to each other respectfully.

Their goal during these times is to figure out a valid solution together rather than trying to prove themselves right. Effort must be made on both sides to find common ground to find solutions to challenging problems together.

There’s no magic formula that helps certain couples be better at handling conflicts. Instead, it’s more of a continual development on setting ground rules on how to interact with each other during difficult conversations.

What to do?

The next time you have a bad fight, wait until you cool down then set up some rules you can lay down for the next time things get heated. Here are some important ones to get you started:

  • When your argument starts escalating and emotions start to take over, slow things down, start your conversations respectfully and softly. Be sure to take turns speaking.
  • When your partner is speaking, don’t interrupt and instead stay engaged and give your full attention
  • Avoid words such as “always” and “never” when describing your partner’s behavior that you disapprove of.
  • Express how you feel about your partner’s actions rather than criticizing the actions.

12. Dig deeper to hear what your partner is really trying to tell you

If you’ve been in a long-term relationship, then you’ve probably had one of those arguments where it goes on and on to the point where you don’t even remember what you were fighting about anymore. It can get to a point where your partner is telling you s/he’s upset about one thing, but what s/he is really upset about is something totally different. As a result, both of you just end up worn out and frustrated.

Healthy couples dig deeper during an emotional argument to really hear what the other is actually trying to say.

For example, let’s say your partner all of a sudden yells at you for 10 minutes about how you left your dirty socks lying around the floor. It’s likely s/he’s not as upset about the socks as much as s/he is about the fact that you don’t appreciate all the hard work s/he puts into keeping the house clean. It makes her/him feel like you don’t care about her/him enough to notice the things s/he does for you.

It’s important to address the underlying issue because let’s say you did start cleaning up your dirty socks, it still might now help with the feeling that your partner feels like s/he’s not appreciated.

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What to do?

The next time your partner starts an argument with you about something that seems trivial, ask yourself “What is the real issue here that my partner is experiencing and what is she really trying to express to me?” Ask clarifying questions that help the partner identify and confirm what he is really trying to communicate with you.

You can frame your questions in a way that invites the partner to share more and go deeper.

“I’m sorry about not picking up my dirty socks and putting it in the hamper and I’ll be sure to try my best to do so from now on, but I feel like there is something more going on here. What’s going on?”

13. Make it a habit to touch each other

Physical touch releases oxytocin,[4] which is known as the “love hormone” and it plays an important role in promoting feelings of trust, devotion and bonding. Some more studies about why you need to touch each other more here: 6 Surprising Reasons You Need to Be Touched

It’s no surprise that studies have shown elderly nursing home residents usually feel unloved because of a lack of physical contact with others.[5]

Love and marriage experts Dr. Charles & Dr. Elizabeth Schmitz shared that touching is a key factor to lasting relationships and that most successfully married couples do it often. Their research has even shown that touch outranks sex when it comes to factors of a successful marriage.

Simple activities such as exchanging hugs, snuggling and holding hands all are great types of physical engagement that will help promote the well being of your relationship.

What to do?

Get into a daily habit that involves physical touch with your spouse. Here are a few ideas to get you started:

  • Hug and kiss your partner each morning when you wake up and at night before you go to bed.
  • Hold hands when you go out for a walk.
  • Snuggle together while on the couch when watching TV.
  • Give your partner surprise massages.

14. Prevent yourself from taking your partner for granted

Gratitude has been shown to be an important factor in developing close relationships.[6] It can intensify the feeling of being connected, which is why it’s so important to incorporate it into your own relationship. While we all love feeling appreciated, it’s important to appreciate our partners as well.

You can be thankful for something your partner does for you but gratitude can be so much more life changing when you are thankful for your partner’s character. For example, you might be thankful that s/he washes the dishes after you and your children, but you’re even more thankful because s/he does it because s/he knows you hate doing dishes. This in turn might motivate you to clean the bathroom because you know how much s/he hates cleaning the toilets.

Gratitude starts a generosity cycle. It’s what can make you more willing to do more for your partner to express how thankful you are for him/her. It helps you see the value in your partner and it’s what motivates you to put in the effort it takes to hold onto that relationship.

One study found that people reported being more thoughtful and responsive to their partner’s needs on days when they felt more grateful for their partners.[7]

What to do?

It will benefit you a ton to stay on the lookout for things you are grateful for about your partner and get into a habit of keeping track of it. One great method is to keep a gratitude journal. It doesn’t all have to be big things that you appreciate. It could be small things like the way s/he does something makes you laugh. You can also spontaneously share what you wrote down with your partner and watch it make you appreciate them even more.

15. Speak your partner’s love language

Dr. Gary Chapman’s book, “The Five Love Languages” talks about how every individual receives and gives love differently. He categorizes the love languages into five types:

  • Gifts
  • Words of Affirmation
  • Acts of Service
  • Touch
  • Quality Time

Being aware of what your partner’s love languages are will help you learn how to express your love for her in a way she most feels loved. For example, while you might express your love through giving gifts, your partner might appreciate it the most when you encourage her through words of affirmation.

Speaking each other’s love languages fluently will be what helps maintain your relational satisfaction.

What to do?

Use the Love Language evaluation for yourself and your partner so you can learn ways to express yourself best by learning to speak your partners love language.

The greatest relationships are built

You’ve probably realized by now that amazing relationships don’t happen on its own. Instead, the best kinds of relationships are built. It requires hard work, authenticity, and courage.

Rather than relying on feelings to motivate you to improve your relationship, maybe it’s time to take action and cultivate an environment for the two of you that can promote better connection with each other even through the tough times.

Feel free to utilize any of these techniques to build the relationship you and your partner have always wanted.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Daniel J. Siegel: The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind
[2] NBC News: Smiling can trick your brain into happiness — and boost your health
[3] Dr. Bowen White, the National Institute for Play
[4] National Public Radio: Human Connections Start With A Friendly Touch
[5] NCBI: Elderly residents: perceptions of nurses’ comforting touch.
[6] NCBI: Beyond Reciprocity: Gratitude and Relationships in Everyday Life
[7] Psychology Today: Is Gratitude the Antidote to Relationship Failure?

More by this author

Eugene K. Choi

A life coach who helps people discover how to best utilize their passions and talents through a proven process.

How to Be Happy Again: 13 Simple Ways to Shake off Sadness Now 15 Ways Meditation Benefits Your Brain Power and Your Mood Meditation for Beginners: How to Meditate Deeply and Quickly How a Gratitude Journal Can Drastically Change Your Life How to Attain Self Realization (Step-By-Step Guide)

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Last Updated on April 14, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

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