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The Law of Attraction is a Dangerous Delusion

The Law of Attraction is a Dangerous Delusion

    One of the biggest bandwagons that has rolled through the self-help community in recent years is the so-called Law of Attraction (LoA). This claims that you attract into your life whatever you think about.  Before I explain why I believe that this is not a law, not true, and not helpful, let me differentiate the LoA from some associated but different self-help concepts that actually do work.

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    1.  Positive Thinking. There is considerable evidence that having a positive, optimistic, can-do frame of mind will lead to much better outcomes in many circumstances than having a negative, pessimistic or cynical approach.  Studies show that positive thinkers generally do better, live longer, and are healthier and happier than negative thinkers.

    2.  Focus, Goal Setting and Planning. There are many benefits in having a clear focus on what you want to achieve, in setting goals, in measuring progress against those goals and in taking corrective actions when you fall short.  Many successful people base their day on having an action plan that they work through.

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    3.  Visualization. Visualising a successful action can assist you to achieve it.  If you are nervous about making a speech then visualizing yourself giving a confident, dynamic performance will help you to do just that.  Visualising a great golf swing or a good tennis backhand stroke can help supplement your training and practice.

    4.  Self-Belief. Most successful people have enormous self-belief.  They know that they have something special to offer and that they can achieve great things.  They use this self-belief as the basis on which to build the plans, improvements, learnings and actions that lead to success.

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    5.  An Attitude of Gratitude. Most of us have a great deal to be thankful for.  Counting our blessings and giving thanks help us to get our difficulties into perspective and engender a positive frame of mind.

    So having listed those self-help mantras that actually work let us turn to the big idea that does not.  The Law of Attraction as expounded by Bob Proctor, by Rhonda Byrne in her best-selling book, The Secret, and by her many followers claims that all you need to do is to think about the things that you want in your life and the ‘Universe’ will supply them in abundance – whether they are positive or negative.   So if you think about money you will get money; if you focus on your debts you will stay in debt.   If you think about being slim you will become slim whereas if you constantly worry about how fat you are you will stay fat.   Unfortunately for the proponents of this ‘law’ there is no scientific evidence to support it.  There are plenty of anecdotes from people who believe the law worked for them but for each of these stories there are many other possible explanations.   No one has carried out a controlled experiment showing that the so-called law actually works.

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    Furthermore the law runs up against some very practical difficulties.  What if several people all want the same promotion and think about it furiously?  How can they all get the same post?  The law implies that whatever difficulties you have in life are the result of you thinking the wrong thoughts.  So it appears that an abused child, a rape victim or a prisoner in a concentration camp was somehow to blame because they thought negative thoughts.  This is offensive to victims and flies in the face of common sense.

    According to the LoA if I want to win the gold medal in the 100 metres in the next Olympic Games or become President of the USA or get Jennifer Lopez as my girlfriend then all I have to do is think about my goal and it will come to me.  If we want a cure for cancer then we should stop spending money on research and just think about it instead.

    The appeal of the LoA lies in its lazy proposition.  You do not need hard work and discipline to lose weight or get rich – you can do it by thinking.  Unfortunately this just is not true.   The LoA is delusional.  It is dangerous because it misleads people into believing that imagery alone will work without action.   To succeed in life you need things like talent, diligence, persistence, skills, hard-work and maybe a little luck.  You can achieve great things – but in order to do so you have to do a lot more than just think about them.

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    Paul Sloane

    Professional Keynote Speaker, Author, Innovation Expert

    How to Win an Argument – Dos, Don’ts and Sneaky Tactics How to Get Rich: 11 Bold Moves That Guarantee Wealth How to be a Brilliant Conversationalist Think Laterally Write A Killer Resume In Seven Easy Steps

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    Last Updated on July 5, 2019

    5 Reasons Why You Should Always Be Yourself

    5 Reasons Why You Should Always Be Yourself

    When it comes to being yourself, there can be a lot of pressure from the outside world as it tries to influence who you are. Living in a society that is constantly developing, it’s important for you to always be yourself from the inside out. When you deeply know yourself and the boundaries that you have set, you are more likely to experience a fulfilling and rewarding life. Without knowing yourself and establishing those boundaries, you can easily be pushed around and end up on a dirt path.

    “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it” – Matthew 7:13-14

    You have the option of taking the path that is broad or taking the path that is narrow. You can either conform to what life wants you to be, or have the courage to remain true to yourself throughout the years. It’s definitely a challenge to have a strong sense of self when we are constantly getting distracted and being influenced by the media and society’s way of life. But if you want to reach your fullest potential in life, it all starts with being yourself.

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    Why should you always be yourself?

    Because you will:

    1. Live in alignment with your values and beliefs. Being yourself is all about knowing what you believe in and the values that you live by. When you are not yourself, you will take on the values and beliefs of others. This is when you start conforming to other people’s expectations and way of thinking. When you know your values and why you do what you do, you will live according to your own values and beliefs.
    2. Establish your own identity. When you are able to have a solid foundation of being you, you are establishing your own sense of identity. No matter what happens in your life, you will always know who you are. There will be times where you may feel lost or distracted, but if you have your own identity you’ll be able to get back on the right path. Without establishing your own identity, you may easily conform and lose yourself.
    3. Build courage. It takes a great amount of courage when you decide to take the path that goes against the crowd. The reason why the majority of people take the broad path is because it’s easy. It’s easy to just follow the crowd. It’s more of a challenge when you stay true to yourself and establish your own identity. This challenge of always being yourself takes courage and inner strength. No matter what comes your way, you’ll know how to handle it.
    4. Establish boundaries. When you are always yourself, you know what your limits are and the boundaries that you have set for yourself. When people cross your boundaries, you will know. But if you don’t establish boundaries, people may very well walk all over you and take advantage of you. If you are always yourself and you establish boundaries, you are more likely to be aware when people start taking advantage of you. Create and establish your boundaries.
    5. Find focus and direction. When you are always yourself, you are more likely to have focus and direction in your life. Imagine someone who is constantly conforming to other people’s expectations. Do you think this person has focus and direction? I don’t think so. When you stay true to who you are, you are more likely to know the goals you want to accomplish and how to go about accomplishing them. You are able to stay focused and know which direction to take in order for you to accomplish your goals.

    No matter what you experience in life, the only person that will always remain constant is you.

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    Featured photo credit: María Victoria Heredia Reyes via unsplash.com

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