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20 Things Only People Who Aren’t Addicted to Their Phone Understand

20 Things Only People Who Aren’t Addicted to Their Phone Understand

Smartphone addiction is growing at an alarming rate. If you are like me, you may have managed to avoid the habit and you will easily be able to relate to the 20 points below. You might also share it with likeminded souls and pass it on to those who may be already addicted.

 1. You use your phone for emergencies and for urgent messages only.

This is how phones should be used. I was so glad I had mine when my car battery went flat the other day. A quick call to my mechanic and we had the new battery fixed in a jiffy. How many times have we been able to text friends to warn of late flights, traffic problems or other emergencies? These are the beauties of modern communication but I refuse to use it as an extra limb. People who are seriously addicted seem to have an extra limb!

2. You do not know what nomophobia means.

Of course you do not know what this phobia is about, but maybe you guessed? Yes, it stands for ‘no mobile phobia’. In one survey, 73% of the respondents said that they were almost never more than five feet away from their phone. We can thank our lucky stars that we will never have this phobia and we can go about our daily lives being normal, social creatures without having to depend on a handset.

3. You can parent your children without being attached to your phone.

You know how to give your kids quality time. You never need to be reminded to switch off when you enter your home so that you give your kids your full attention for that first half hour or so. The fact is that the kids themselves have complained about this. The Swedish government did a survey and they found that 33% of the kids felt neglected because their parents were always looking at their smartphones.

4. You know when and how to switch off.

Why should you be in touch with the office for more than 8 hours a day? The great advantage we have is that we know how to spend some really relaxing time without relying on an electronic device.

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Why this addiction? You can understand the odd emergency and being on a business trip abroad. But the ‘normality’ is getting out of control. About two thirds of people with a smartphone are in touch with their offices for more than 13.5 hours a day. In addition, 40% of British managers are now clocking up a 60 hour week. You can be sure that they almost never switch off their phones.

5. You rarely suffer from insomnia.

While you would consider it absolutely normal to switch off your phone and leave it outside your bedroom, many people do not! They take their phones to bed with them, look at them, text and play games. The blue light interferes with the release of melatonin, an essential hormone to help you get some decent sleep. The next time someone complains about lack of sleep, ask them if they take their phone to bed with them!

6. You will never need to detox.

Look at what is happening in South Korea. Internet and smartphone addiction has become so bad that the science ministry has decided to intervene. Schools are now required to teach children about the dangers of these addictions. If we do nothing about it, this may become an uncomfortable reality for our own children very soon.

7. You can chat with your family and/or significant other at mealtimes.

Mealtimes are precious moments when we can reconnect with our loved ones. It is probably the only time in the day when we can get to talk to them. But when smartphone addiction takes over, kids, parents and partners are still attached to their devices and the TV may be on as well. Observe families and couples in restaurants and you will see that I am not exaggerating.

8. You never use your smartphone in the shower or when having sex.

It’s incredible how the use of smartphone has taken over people’s lives. 10% actually admit to using it in the shower or when they are having sex. A whopping 50% say they use the phone while driving. This has been called ‘driving while intexticated.’ The figures are shocking. If a person texts while driving, this is 23 times more likely to cause an accident. Murder by smartphone is no longer a joke.

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9. You dream about phone-free zones.

Imagine not having to listen to people’s very loud conversations on the bus and train? You do not want to know about their problems or anxieties. Just like smoking in the cinema and on aeroplanes was banned, we can hope that certain areas will soon be phone-free and we can have a coffee in peace.

10. You will never suffer from text claw or cell phone elbow.

Because you never overuse your smartphone, you are unlikely to suffer from finger cramping or cell phone elbow. This condition is an inflammation of the tendons in the fingers caused by the continuous scrolling, texting and gaming on the phone. When your elbow is constantly bent, you may get an unpleasant numbness in the fingers.

11. You still know how to have a real conversation.

You know the feeling. Your friend is constantly interrupted by text messages or even answers a call as you try to have a real conversation with her/him. The Facebook updates, the texts, the latest news are all demanding their attention. You get extremely irritated. No wonder you feel that artificial intelligence may soon take over our lives.

12. You will never suffer from text neck.

If you are slouched over your computer, tablet or smartphone for very long periods, the rather delicate neck muscles will begin to suffer. Doctors now call this ‘text neck’. Just another price the smartphone addicts have to pay for their habit.

13. Your eyesight will remain in good shape.

Because you are using your smartphone in an intelligent manner, you will never have to worry about eyestrain. Doctors now are warning patients that dry eyes, blurred vision, headaches, and dizziness may be caused by excessive texting, scrolling and checking the screen for emails, Instagram updates, and tweets. People should have breaks, do some neck stretching and hold the smartphone at a distance of 16 inches. But you will never have to worry about this, thank goodness!

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14. You do not suffer from checking habits.

One explanation of this smartphone addiction is that boredom induces people to check their emails and Twitter account in the hope of getting some information reward. Some estimates say that the average user checks their device about 150 times a day. Just think of all that time, effort and eyestrain involved in all that. You could remind an addict of that.

15. Your relationship is not at risk.

Imagine a smartphone addiction being responsible for a breakdown of a relationship. It is happening more and more often, according to a report in the Daily Mail. It is disruptive and can cause tension in a relationship. It might just be the symptom of deeper issues but if people switched off their phones and talked to each other, they might well be able to resolve their differences.

16. You know how to manage your time.

You have certain times of the day when you check your phone for messages and other urgent stuff. It is essential in our always-on society. But, apart from that, you know how to manage your time and profit from it. You have set times for reading, cleaning, exercise, cooking and connecting with real life friends who you can actually kiss and hug! Smartphone checking can never replace these valuable pursuits.

17. You are less likely to suffer from depression.

Psychologists have established that people addicted to smartphones are more likely to suffer from depression, emotional instability and materialism. One study found that these people were liable to be moody and were temperamental. They were also less likely to stay focused on their current task. We all have our own mental problems, tics and disorders but at least if we do not get addicted, we have a better chance of survival.

18. You have more fun.

Smartphone addicts probably think that they can all the fun, entertainment and information that they could ever possibly desire. They are paying a high price because they are wasting three hours a day checking their devices. A study by Kent State University found that students who took a photo on their smartphone of a painting at a museum were less likely to remember it. The person who simply enjoyed looking at it had a much better recall and more pleasant memory of it. This describes you and me because our smartphone is off when we visit an art gallery or museum.

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19. You do not have to reply to emails straightaway.

If you are like me, then email replies can be dealt with in 24 hours as this is standard etiquette and protocol. But the smartphone addict gets worked up and feels that he or she has to reply immediately. This adds to the stress but also means that they are multi-tasking and constantly ruining their concentration.

20. You never worry about phantom cell phone syndrome.

You and I should be so grateful that we need never be anxious about the latest syndrome which is called, believe it or not, the phantom cellphone syndrome. This only happens to addicts. One study showed that up to 90% of students tested were reporting this strange sensation of having felt their cell phone vibrate when in fact it hadn’t!

Having read this list, I bet you are glad that you know how to make the best use of your smartphone without becoming a virtual zombie who has forgotten how to really live.

Let us know in the comments how you managed to stay sane and avoid smartphone addiction.

Featured photo credit: Handsome Man In Hoodie Holding and Looking At Mobile Smart Phone Outdoors via shutterstock.com

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Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

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Last Updated on February 18, 2019

13 Tips to Face Your Fears, Grow with It and Enjoy the Ride

13 Tips to Face Your Fears, Grow with It and Enjoy the Ride

Fear. I spend my life talking about fear — fighting fears, fixing fears and understanding fears. And yet I doubt I get 10 calls a year from people saying “Mandie can you help me fix my fear?”

Why is this so critically important to you?

The realization for me is that fear is not the fundamental driving force in your life it’s what regardless of whether I’m talking to a doctor, a teacher, a CEO’s, a senior citizens or teenager – every single one of those conversations has a direct correlation with your world.

Fear can range from the overwhelming desire to look away or stop in your tracks to literally fleeing your country and the life you knew. In this article, I will share you with 13 tips to face your fears and enjoy the ride.

1. Know That Fear Is Real, but Can Be Overcome

Right now around the world people are facing fear — real fear. Fear that I pray my children and I will never experience. Does that lessen my fears or your fears in your relativity safe 21st century life?

When I look at the world we all live in, I find that fear like so many other emotions can mean so many different things to so many different people:

  • The child who has to be physically dragged to their first day of school.
  • The man facing the judge.
  • The woman with her hand poised over the buttons over her phone because she has to walk down a dark corridor late at night alone.
  • The man as the surgeon says “count backwards from 10 Mr Smith.”
  • The woman that’s told “We are sorry, we can’t help you.”
  • The man that faces the empty circle of a gun and prays for his very existence.

These and a million more (Portrayed in every kind of movie, book or song you could imagine) are what make us human. We face fear and somehow move forward or are stopped in our tracks.

Like the rabbit in the headlights of the car that veers off through the field away from the tyres of the car or stays still praying for salvation. Like someone will save them. Sound familiar?

Fear is huge. Fear is everywhere and yet fear can be overcome, controlled and can even be a power for good.

2. Accept Your Fear

Firstly if you aren’t facing the barrel of the gun, atrocities that make the news or impeding death, that’s a good start. However it doesn’t mean your fear is any less real.

We are quick to say “I can’t moan, my life is not as bad as X.” While in theory, that’s honorable your appreciation of Mr. or Mrs. X’s horrific life won’t change anything directly. So accept your fear is relative to you.

And here’s what can be done.

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3. Get Some Perspective

I found myself asking anyone that would answer “what is your worst fear”. The answer that intrigued me the most came from my daughter (15 years old and she usually has a copy of Fight the Fear – my book – in her school bag so she can help someone else be as positive and confident as her. No matter what life throws up.)

And her fear, surprised me — heights. I pointed out that we live in a sprawling bungalow (one storey) and the highest she goes is two storeys’ at school! She laughed but added, fear isn’t like that Mum. I know it’s not a real fear, but it’s like when you stand on a chair and feel unsafe.

That girl will go far. Because she truly gets fear.

We know something is scary and yet we still do it. Why? Because we have a perspective to the fear. When you lose perspective, it can feel too big, and too scary.

So look around you to get some perspective on your fear:

  • Are you really at risk?
  • Will this kill you?
  • Which leads us on to..
  • If the worse was to happen what would it be?

4. Hold a Hand

As a coach, it is my job to holds someone’s metaphorical hand and help them face a fear.

Like the child petrified of the thunder storm or the teen that can’t get back in a car again after failing their test, your job as a parent is to reassure, encourage, enable and motivate someone to face something that ideally they never would choose to again.

We know many of our fears aren’t real. However, it is only when someone guides us with love, respect, lack of judgement and safety are we able to get through fear. And trust me, you can get through your fears. I’ve seen it so many times.

Ask yourself:

  • If the worse were to happen, what would that be?
  • Could that really happen?
  • If the worse did happen, how would you recover?
  • If the worse were to happen, what would you need to do next?

By seeing fear as not the end destination but part of being human, you can see through it’s wily evil ways and move forward.

5. Know Whose Hand You Hold Either Physically or Emotionally

This helps with fears for the rest of your life.

Think of someone you can always rely on (and ideally you won’t just answer yourself because that adds a lot of pressure to your existence!) And you will find that you’ve already found a way to get through fear.

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The beauty of this is that it means that fear becomes part of life not something to be feared and shied away from.

It means you know you can turn to your friend, partner, colleague, parent, sibling and say “Right I need to deal with this, and I’m going to need you to help me.”

For one moment, think about it from the other person’s view point. When we get to help other people we feel valued, loved, respected and lots of other positive emotions and we get a good dose of positive chemicals setting off in our bodies too.

Your fear, and your determination to fight it, helped someone else too. Now that’s cool right?

6. Understand That There Are Some Things Fear Will Never Touch

I like to find role models in life — people who have faced heroism, history changing moments, war, atrocities, miracles, life saving inventions.

Not everyone was looking for greatness, however they all found it. And one of my favourite books to date is written about Alistair Urquhart, the forgotten highlander. If this doesn’t get turned into a film in the future, then no man’s story is likely to.

Alistair went through the most horrific experiences in the 2nd world war. If you think of one of the awful things that happened back then in our world, Alistair went through at least 3 of them! Asked afterwards how did you cope? He talked about how whatever they did to his body, no matter how they starved, tortured, threatened or mocked him, they couldn’t have his mind. In his mind he was free.

Of all the people’s voices I’ve heard in my head over the years, this is one of those statements that reminds me anything is possible if you have faith and hope.

Look for the things in life that fear can’t touch. They will create confidence and faith for the future, whatever you face. And they will give you a sense of why being you is awesome.

Of all the billions of people on this planet, no one will have an answer identical to yours!

7. Process Your Fears to Carry on with Life

Being brave is not about sticking your chest out and smiling regardless of what hell you endure. It is about finding a way to emotionally process your fears to be able to keep going.

I have a tool kit of things I can rely on – tools, strategies, techniques. They include people to hug or talk to, music. hobbies, walks on the beach and even my favourite food. It sounds mad but at the times where I have questioned “how will I get through this?” I’ve found immense joy in doing the most unlikely of thing that makes me smile.

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It may be a short lived moment of happiness. However, it reminded that nothing stays the same and I can find away.

One client told me that it was crazy when it felt like their world was falling around their ears to run a bath to the brim (you don’t waste water) get the best bath oils, light too many candles, lock the door and drink a glass of bubbly (champagne is only for special occasions.)

Did that moment fix the disaster that my clients life felt? No, however it gave them a moment of calm and the brain is far quicker to find solutions, resolve and motivation to keep going when you do that.

It may feel like madness to do something you love, however it can be a powerful way to help you find solutions to the fears you face in life.

8. Assume the Worse

If you read the statement from the client above. Notice how they assumed it was wrong to fill the bath up to the top? How bubbly is only for special occasions?

Think how naughty they felt to be doing something that was not allowed?

  • Think about what age it may have made them feel?
  • Think about how they feel about champagne?
  • What special moments it’s been a part of in their lives?

And you can see how the assumptions they made about their “right” to have these things was not healthy.

When I drag the assumptions out of people’s words for them to see, they are often struck by how negative the words make them feel.

Don’t assume your words aren’t impacting on you. You can go through fear and actually enjoy the ride when you take the time to understand how you are letting words get to you.

9. Take a Fear That Feels Insurmountable Right Now.

If you were to repeat it to me out loud, what would you say?

Would you have blame on yourself in there? Would you assume others can do it and it’s just you? Would you feel small, unsuccessful, useless, unworthy?

Usually, when you do this exercise, you are able to spot the untruths that run wild in your head convincing you that you are doomed. And rarely when we are faced with our assumptions is there is a lot of evidence to them.

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10. You Are Not Defined by Your Fear

One fear does not define your life – be mindful of that. It is likely to lead you to thinking of all the times you’ve succeeded and bring a moment of calm, confidence and faith back to you.

11. Go with Fear

When you learn to go with fear, you could find yourself actually having fun, no seriously – having fun.

I have a few amazing clients I’m working with right now who would describe themselves as life long worriers, or pessimists. In the past that has served them well, enabling them to keep safe, steer clear of risks and even develop strategies in the event of disasters. However, now they find it’s becoming hard to break the cycle and they really want to because it’s holding them back.

Notice how they’ve found their hidden fears and want to face them?

One client said “I knew this was going to be tough, and I knew I couldn’t fight it alone and I knew you would be the one to help me.” Before I sat an incredibly successful, confident, capable business owner with a family and a social life to die for.

However, I’ve learned that the most successful looking lives can hide things that impact on life, success, love, happiness and business.

We didn’t start with the fear that they felt was holding them back, we broke the fear down, and found lots of little obstacles that had been deemed as “life” and “unchangeable” and “that’s just the way it is” by developing awareness to the little steps on the road to their obstacles to happiness and success they were able to tackle them in a different way.

12. Discover Great Skills in Your Scary Moments

And in that clients words “I came here to work with you to grow my company, and my own personal skills. I didn’t expect to get the children to be cleaning up after themselves and my partner being more attentive! It all feels a little magic.”

The moral is that out of the scariest of moments, we can find great skills we didn’t know we had. Find better, healthier, happier ways to live and find ways to enjoy life more. (And have a bit of magic!)

What a great place to be in ready for the next fear that thinks it’s going to get in the way of you, right?

13. Own Your Fear

Think back over these tips and come up with at least one example for each one. Write them down. Put them on your phone. Turn them into a piece of art. Turn them into a poem. Frame them. Go for a fast walk across the fields, beach, down town and repeat these things in your head to the sound of your feet on the ground.

We rarely take the time to appreciate how far we have come, how much we can achieve or what we are capable of – by really owning the tips in this article you will have given your brain a big fat dose of “Damn right I can do this!” and the motivation and accountability to say “Let’s find a way” through any fear.

You can’t help but feel good when you see that can you? And fear doesn’t stand a chance, does it?

More Resources About Fighting Fear

Featured photo credit: Ben White via unsplash.com

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