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15 Things Only Moms of Boys Understand

15 Things Only Moms of Boys Understand

Soon-to-be-mothers can think they know what motherhood will be like, but as soon as the kids arrive, it’s a completely different story. There is a handful of unmistakable struggles that all moms of boys experience throughout raising these youngsters.

1. You’ve become immersed in the craziness and impatience of young boys.

Let’s face it—there’s nothing quite like raising boys to test the limits of your physical capacities. Heck, moms of boys know that raising children pushes the envelope of mental and emotional capacities too. Taking your boys anywhere in public can feel more like organizing an entire circus than simply engaging in some quality family time.

2. You take your mistakes far too personally.

As a mom, there’s an irrevocable desire within you to see your boys succeed. When something goes wrong, it becomes easy to take this personally. Remember that your boys are still learning about life right alongside you!

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3. You’re flabbergasted at the amount of food consumed within the home.

Out of every woe that moms of boys share, this is likely the most common. The costs for one month’s groceries seem to astound you more and more every month. Where does all of that food go, anyway? It’s like they have invisible hamster pouches.

4. You get frustrated anytime someone says, “Aren’t you glad you have boys?”

Your exasperation is founded on two emotions whenever someone has the nerve to utter this question. First, of course you’re happy to be the mother of boys! They’re your own children and you wouldn’t trade them for anyone else. Second, it’s as though the question implies that boys are somehow more valuable than girls. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with girls, but since you have boys, you’re focused on being the best mom possible for your boys.

5. You get home almost every day to see them playing video games instead of doing homework.

Glowing screens and shoot-em-up sound effects seem to emanate from every corner of your house, and you wonder if you’ll ever get a minute of peace and quiet.

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6. You’ve given up trying to keep bathroom time “private.”

Any time you need to run to the restroom, you’ve become accustomed to listening for the pitter-patter of small feet and the inevitable questions for mommy that will ensue. At times you catch yourself in the middle of this thought process, wondering how it ever became normal. You wonder if your own boys would appreciate “bathroom questions,” and then realize that they probably do. Speaking of privacy—

7. Being awoken by your boys jumping on the bed is hardly a surprise anymore.

A few years ago when your boys were still infants, you thought you only had to swear off quality sleep for the first year or two. Little did you know that sleep disruptions would remain normal. You’d give anything now for a week’s worth of quality sleep!

8. You’ve redefined what “safety” means for your boys.

Harking back to their toddler years again, you developed ever-watchful eyes to notice if even the tiniest bruise showed up on their bodies. Now, seeing how your boys jump, leap, climb and crawl over everything in sight, “safety” has suddenly become less of a constant worry. Dramatic as your boys may be, you’ve learned that a small cut on their thumb doesn’t warrant a trip to the ER.

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9. You’ve found that boys are just as messy as girls.

Any time you’re having a conversation with a friend who has daughters, it’s become commonplace to hear, “Oh, aren’t you happy boys aren’t as messy as girls?” You throw your head back in a huge belly laugh, responding that no, boys are just as messy as girls, if not more so. Moms of boys everywhere have witnessed firsthand how a clean home one day can look like a train wreck in the jungle the next morning.

10. You’ve been astonished with the clothing demands of boys.

Just a few years ago, you thought raising boys would mean less to spend on clothing. Three boys and dozens of blue jeans and t-shirts later, you’re wiser for this silly assumption.

11. You’re perturbed when people say, “At least boys love their mommies!”

Yes, at the end of the day, of course the boys love their mommy. But is it any different for girls? Why do people think girls have less of a heart than boys?

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12. You grew used to invasions of privacy ages ago.

You’re tired out from the constant demands your children place on you. It seems like there’s less and less personal time, and you’ve accepted the fact that any attempts for true privacy have to be scheduled and crafted with precision.

13. You’re anxious about who your boys will be in the future.

You’ve probably heard time and again how boys don’t seem to call or visit home as often as girls. You have faith that your boys will be different!

14. You get unnecessary flack for them.

It doesn’t take being out in public too long for a daring passerby to utter something that is less than considerate about having boys. It’s as though they literally have nothing better to say.

15. You’ve run yourself ragged trying to motivate your young boys in life.

As you watch your boys approach adolescence, you can sometimes feel hopeless when thinking about how to get them motivated. For many years on end, it can look like your boys want nothing more than to dive into video games and go crazy outside.

Next time something on this list happens to you, rather than moping about it, use this list as a reminder that moms of boys everywhere are going through the same experiences you are.

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Brad Johnson

Top 5 Kindle Author | Author of 10 Books

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Last Updated on January 3, 2020

The 10 Essential Habits of Positive People

The 10 Essential Habits of Positive People

Are you waiting for life events to turn out the way you want so that you can feel more positive about your life? Do you find yourself having pre-conditions to your sense of well-being, thinking that certain things must happen for you to be happier? Do you think there is no way that your life stresses can make you anything other than “stressed out” and that other people just don’t understand?  If your answer is “yes” to any of these questions, you might find yourself lingering in the land of negativity for too long!

The following are some tips to keep positive no matter what comes your way. This post will help you stop looking for what psychologists call “positivity” in all the wrong places!  Here are the ten essential habits of positive people.

1. Positive people don’t confuse quitting with letting go.

Instead of hanging on to ideas, beliefs, and even people that are no longer healthy for them, they trust their judgement to let go of negative forces in their lives.  Especially in terms of relationships, they subscribe to The Relationship Prayer which goes:

 I will grant myself the ability to trust the healthy people in my life … 

To set limits with, or let go of, the negative ones … 

And to have the wisdom to know the DIFFERENCE!

 2.  Positive people don’t just have a good day – they make a good day.

Waiting, hoping and wishing seldom have a place in the vocabulary of positive individuals. Rather, they use strong words that are pro-active and not reactive. Passivity leads to a lack of involvement, while positive people get very involved in constructing their lives. They work to make changes to feel better in tough times rather than wish their feelings away.

3. For the positive person, the past stays in the past.

Good and bad memories alike stay where they belong – in the past where they happened. They don’t spend much time pining for the good ol’ days because they are too busy making new memories now. The negative pulls from the past are used not for self-flagellation or unproductive regret, but rather productive regret where they use lessons learned as stepping stones towards a better future.

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4. Show me a positive person and I can show you a grateful person.

The most positive people are the most grateful people.  They do not focus on the potholes of their lives.  They focus on the pot of gold that awaits them every day, with new smells, sights, feelings and experiences.  They see life as a treasure chest full of wonder.

5. Rather than being stuck in their limitations, positive people are energized by their possibilities.

Optimistic people focus on what they can do, not what they can’t do.  They are not fooled to think that there is a perfect solution to every problem, and are confident that there are many solutions and possibilities.  They are not afraid to attempt new solutions to old problems, rather than spin their wheels expecting things to be different this time.  They refuse to be like Charlie Brown expecting that this time Lucy will not pull the football from him!

6. Positive people do not let their fears interfere with their lives!

Positive people have observed that those who are defined and pulled back by their fears never really truly live a full life. While proceeding with appropriate caution, they do not let fear keep them from trying new things. They realize that even failures are necessary steps for a successful life. They have confidence that they can get back up when they are knocked down by life events or their own mistakes, due to a strong belief in their personal resilience.

7. Positive people smile a lot!

When you feel positive on the inside it is like you are smiling from within, and these smiles are contagious. Furthermore, the more others are with positive people, the more they tend to smile too! They see the lightness in life, and have a sense of humor even when it is about themselves. Positive people have a high degree of self-respect, but refuse to take themselves too seriously!

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8. People who are positive are great communicators.

They realize that assertive, confident communication is the only way to connect with others in everyday life.  They avoid judgmental, angry interchanges, and do not let someone else’s blow up give them a reason to react in kind. Rather, they express themselves with tact and finesse.  They also refuse to be non-assertive and let people push them around. They refuse to own problems that belong to someone else.

9. Positive people realize that if you live long enough, there are times for great pain and sadness.

One of the most common misperceptions about positive people is that to be positive, you must always be happy. This can not be further from the truth. Anyone who has any depth at all is certainly not happy all the time.  Being sad, angry, disappointed are all essential emotions in life. How else would you ever develop empathy for others if you lived a life of denial and shallow emotions? Positive people do not run from the gamut of emotions, and accept that part of the healing process is to allow themselves to experience all types of feelings, not only the happy ones. A positive person always holds the hope that there is light at the end of the darkness.  

10. Positive person are empowered people – they refuse to blame others and are not victims in life.

Positive people seek the help and support of others who are supportive and safe.They limit interactions with those who are toxic in any manner, even if it comes to legal action and physical estrangement such as in the case of abuse. They have identified their own basic human rights, and they respect themselves too much to play the part of a victim. There is no place for holding grudges with a positive mindset. Forgiveness helps positive people become better, not bitter.

How about you?  How many habits of positive people do you personally find in yourself?  If you lack even a few of these 10 essential habits, you might find that the expected treasure at the end of the rainbow was not all that it was cracked up to be. How could it — if you keep on bringing a negative attitude around?

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I wish you well in keeping positive, because as we all know, there is certainly nothing positive about being negative!

Featured photo credit: Janaína Castelo Branco via flickr.com

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