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Once We Accept Our Own Limits, We Can Go Beyond Them

Once We Accept Our Own Limits, We Can Go Beyond Them

Are you feeling down and out? Continuously shamed and blamed because you just do not conform to societally prescribed limits of doing ‘all right’ in the eyes of those around you? You become the social misfit, the rebel, the stubborn hard head. You have heard it all…

‘Why do you have to be so scattered?’

‘You have no sense of order’

‘Wake up!’

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‘Go to sleep!’

‘Your house is a mess, your life is a mess, your  desk is a mess!’

Wait, before you recluse into a corner to avoid all the slamming, listen to this!  These are configured moral shortcomings others devise for you. Every human soul has some shortcoming and some limits,  reclaim your moral agency, humanity,  freedom and life worth, not just for the eyes of others, but for yourself!

Studies have proven you are actually on top of it. Yes, you are. Think about it, you try to keep all neat and tidy but it falls into disarray. If you say yes to a mess, you embrace the universe in its chaotic nature. Messy people may carry stigmas of being imbalanced and apathetic individuals. Actually, if you are disorganized, you have seen the light! You do not let your life be dictated by the ‘neat’ police!

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Let it out! Curse away, why don’t you

Do you find yourself at a loss for words, ending up in a stream of curses that turns heads? The myth of curse words has been deconstructed in a study. Those who came up with a higher stream of curse words in a minute had a higher IQ. Cursing is a release mechanism that makes you feel stronger and the end result? Emotionally intelligent, creative, and beautiful geniuses!

    Be the proud insomniac

    The dreary voices echo in your head, ‘just go and sleep, why don’t you?  Look at the time!’

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      Have you always been scolded for abnormal sleeping habits? Well actually, according to scientific research, night owls have higher IQ scores. If you sleep late, you share the trend with others of high prestige!

      We live in a world that caters to early risers. Most schools begin in early morning hours, most of everything else begins in the mornings, and the common life lesson is “The early bird gets the worm.” Early risers seem to do better because of created norms, painting a very negative light for night owls, but research indicates the very opposite.

      Why be bothered with dreams when you can do? Stay up with the moon!

      What a mess! Or is it?

      (MAYBE A COLLAGE OF GENIUS)

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      So you swear too much, you’re always awake when the rest are in dreamland, and your desk is a total mess!

      All of that is good news. A University of Minnesota study reveals that messy desks are linked to geniuses. Your mind will be occupied with important stuff if you’re not always trying to put everything in its place. Messy environments lead to creative workflows

      Kathleen Vohs, a psychological scientist, says that haphazard environments are the disorderly breakaway from tradition and provide new and fresh insights. Growing up, society makes you believe that if you have a messy space around you have a messy mind. And years later, the drills continue You were forced to clean up or faced being grounded.

      Now get out of your sobbing corner, you cursing, messy night owl! You are a proven genius!

      “It’s a law of physics. The hard truth is that the universe itself is dead-set against our long-term efforts to bring order to the chaos in our lives. That’s because the universe loves chaos” – Adam Frank (Physicist)

      Featured photo Credit: Man with head against wall, The Moon

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      Nena Tenacity

      Nena is passionate about writing. She shares her everyday health and lifestyle tips on Lifehack.

      Here Are 30+ Easy High Fibre Breakfast Ideas You Can Try At Home A Wholesome Diet Is What You Need to Gain Happiness: 30 Natural Low-Carb Foods 10 Best Healthy Snacks That Even Gym People Eat When They’re Hungry! Want A Quick Yet Healthy Breakfast? Avocado Toast Is Your New Breakfast Idea Want To Look Younger And Be Healthier? Acai Berry Is Your New Breakfast Idea!

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      Last Updated on August 4, 2020

      The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

      The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

      No!

      It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

      But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

      What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

      But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here’s how to master the Gentle Art of Saying No:

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      1. Value Your Time

      Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”

      2. Know Your Priorities

      Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time?

      For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.

      3. Practice Saying No

      Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.

      4. Don’t Apologize

      A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.

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      5. Stop Being Nice

      Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets.

      Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.

      6. Say No to Your Boss

      Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no,” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning.

      But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.

      7. Pre-Empting

      It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting,

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      “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”

      8. Get Back to You

      Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them:

      “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.”

      At least you gave it some consideration.

      9. Maybe Later

      If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say,

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      “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].”

      Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.

      10. It’s Not You, It’s Me

      This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often, the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time.

      Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

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      Featured photo credit: Kyle Glenn via unsplash.com

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