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10 Hacks to Tame Toddler Tantrums

10 Hacks to Tame Toddler Tantrums

Toddlers don’t need a good reason to flick the tantrum switch. They’ll let rip anywhere, anytime. The bigger the audience, the better! Here are some tips to help you dodge those meltdown moments…

1. Distraction

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    When you see the signs of a tantrum building, nip it in the bud… point out an interesting bug, change the subject, whip out your secret stash of bubbles. If possible, physically move away from whatever is provoking the eruption. Diffusing a bomb is better than picking up pieces after it has blown.

    2. Pick your battles
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      Decide which issues are absolute musts – brushing teeth, being strapped into a car chair – don’t budge on those.The rest of it? Be gloriously flexible.  Does it really matter if her t-shirt clashes with her pants, or if she goes to daycare in her slippers? The short person in your life is at an age where they will argue with you for the fun of it. Don’t get sucked in!

      3. Get her wet

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        If it’s winter, run a bath. Summer? Head outdoors to the nearest beach, river, pool, fountain… sprinkler. Water is magical in how quickly it settles grumpy small people. Even a large tub outside in the sun, with a variety of plastic cups and jugs will do the trick. Wetting feet and making footprints can also be quite exciting for a toddler who has never noticed their own tracks before.

        4. Find an animal
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          The soothing effect of a child-friendly pet cannot be under-estimated. Somewhere between the soft fur and tickly whiskers, your wound-up kid may just unravel to a puddle of happy compliance.

          5. Medicine? Drink bubbles!
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            Most liquid medication can do with a good shake before being poured into a spoon. Shaking causes bubbles and these bubbles are your key to avoid being spraypainted in medicine that your toddler isn’t keen on. Presenting your child with a spoon of ‘bubbles’ instead of ‘medicine’ can make all the difference in their wilingness to swallow.

            6. Hairwashing: sorted
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              The easiest way to wash hair in a bath is to get your little one to lie back, and let you get on with it. The challenge is getting her there! Line up some toys on the bath rim behind your child’s back. Bottles of shampoo will also do. When they are ready to have their hair washed, let them lie back on your hand and tell them to look at the goodies you’ve spread out behind them. While you are washing, ask questions. What can you see that is blue? What color is the frog? What is hiding behind the yellow bottle?

              7. Go Outside

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                Being cooped up inside all day, is a recipe for grumpiness. Break the rut and go for a walk outside. Fresh air, interesting bugs and leaves, a change of scenery, all make the perfect antidote to cabin fever.

                8. Get moving

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                  Any unused energy that lurks in your little ones system, will make the next tantrum more spectacular. Put on some loud music and bop around the lounge. Find a jungle gym and let your toddler climb, hang and swing. Use that energy to benefit their bodies, rather than fuel a meltdown.

                  9. Let them help you

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                    I know this thought is enough to lace gray through your hair. Toddler-help means extra mess, a job that takes five times longer and results that are far from perfect. The truth is, your child loves nothing more than being with you and doing whatever you are doing. Every small job you give them, deposits into their skill bank and grows their confidence. Kids who do stuff with the adults in their lives, grow up to be problem solvers who take intiative.

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                    10. Enjoy their company

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                      Toddlers are a non-stop whirl of mess, energy and the question ‘why’? It is not odd to feel drained after spending a few hours together, even more so when you’re on parent-duty 24/7. But they are also inquisitive, loving and fun to be around. When you feel overwhelmed, step back, take a moment to breathe. Allow yourself to see the delightful side of this awesome little person who shares life with you. Laugh together at silly things and don’t let small issues get in the way of big love.

                      Your unconditional love and acceptance will help them navigate the stormy waters of those early years. When you look again, toddler tantrums will be nothing more than a memory.

                       

                       

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                      Featured photo credit: SophiaCorrect5.jpg by martinispygirl via mrg.bz

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                      Last Updated on January 21, 2020

                      The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

                      The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

                      Creating a vision for your life might seem like a frivolous, fantastical waste of time, but it’s not: creating a compelling vision of the life you want is actually one of the most effective strategies for achieving the life of your dreams. Perhaps the best way to look at the concept of a life vision is as a compass to help guide you to take the best actions and make the right choices that help propel you toward your best life.

                      your vision of where or who you want to be is the greatest asset you have

                        Why You Need a Vision

                        Experts and life success stories support the idea that with a vision in mind, you are more likely to succeed far beyond what you could otherwise achieve without a clear vision. Think of crafting your life vision as mapping a path to your personal and professional dreams. Life satisfaction and personal happiness are within reach. The harsh reality is that if you don’t develop your own vision, you’ll allow other people and circumstances to direct the course of your life.

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                        How to Create Your Life Vision

                        Don’t expect a clear and well-defined vision overnight—envisioning your life and determining the course you will follow requires time, and reflection. You need to cultivate vision and perspective, and you also need to apply logic and planning for the practical application of your vision. Your best vision blossoms from your dreams, hopes, and aspirations. It will resonate with your values and ideals, and will generate energy and enthusiasm to help strengthen your commitment to explore the possibilities of your life.

                        What Do You Want?

                        The question sounds deceptively simple, but it’s often the most difficult to answer. Allowing yourself to explore your deepest desires can be very frightening. You may also not think you have the time to consider something as fanciful as what you want out of life, but it’s important to remind yourself that a life of fulfillment does not usually happen by chance, but by design.

                        It’s helpful to ask some thought-provoking questions to help you discover the possibilities of what you want out of life. Consider every aspect of your life, personal and professional, tangible and intangible. Contemplate all the important areas, family and friends, career and success, health and quality of life, spiritual connection and personal growth, and don’t forget about fun and enjoyment.

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                        Some tips to guide you:

                        • Remember to ask why you want certain things
                        • Think about what you want, not on what you don’t want.
                        • Give yourself permission to dream.
                        • Be creative. Consider ideas that you never thought possible.
                        • Focus on your wishes, not what others expect of you.

                        Some questions to start your exploration:

                        • What really matters to you in life? Not what should matter, what does matter.
                        • What would you like to have more of in your life?
                        • Set aside money for a moment; what do you want in your career?
                        • What are your secret passions and dreams?
                        • What would bring more joy and happiness into your life?
                        • What do you want your relationships to be like?
                        • What qualities would you like to develop?
                        • What are your values? What issues do you care about?
                        • What are your talents? What’s special about you?
                        • What would you most like to accomplish?
                        • What would legacy would you like to leave behind?

                        It may be helpful to write your thoughts down in a journal or creative vision board if you’re the creative type. Add your own questions, and ask others what they want out of life. Relax and make this exercise fun. You may want to set your answers aside for a while and come back to them later to see if any have changed or if you have anything to add.

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                        What Would Your Best Life Look Like?

                        Describe your ideal life in detail. Allow yourself to dream and imagine, and create a vivid picture. If you can’t visualize a picture, focus on how your best life would feel. If you find it difficult to envision your life 20 or 30 years from now, start with five years—even a few years into the future will give you a place to start. What you see may surprise you. Set aside preconceived notions. This is your chance to dream and fantasize.

                        A few prompts to get you started:

                        • What will you have accomplished already?
                        • How will you feel about yourself?
                        • What kind of people are in your life? How do you feel about them?
                        • What does your ideal day look like?
                        • Where are you? Where do you live? Think specifics, what city, state, or country, type of community, house or an apartment, style and atmosphere.
                        • What would you be doing?
                        • Are you with another person, a group of people, or are you by yourself?
                        • How are you dressed?
                        • What’s your state of mind? Happy or sad? Contented or frustrated?
                        • What does your physical body look like? How do you feel about that?
                        • Does your best life make you smile and make your heart sing? If it doesn’t, dig deeper, dream bigger.

                        It’s important to focus on the result, or at least a way-point in your life. Don’t think about the process for getting there yet—that’s the next stepGive yourself permission to revisit this vision every day, even if only for a few minutes. Keep your vision alive and in the front of your mind.

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                        Plan Backwards

                        It may sound counter-intuitive to plan backwards rather than forwards, but when you’re planning your life from the end result, it’s often more useful to consider the last step and work your way back to the first. This is actually a valuable and practical strategy for making your vision a reality.

                        • What’s the last thing that would’ve had to happen to achieve your best life?
                        • What’s the most important choice you would’ve had to make?
                        • What would you have needed to learn along the way?
                        • What important actions would you have had to take?
                        • What beliefs would you have needed to change?
                        • What habits or behaviors would you have had to cultivate?
                        • What type of support would you have had to enlist?
                        • How long will it have taken you to realize your best life?
                        • What steps or milestones would you have needed to reach along the way?

                        Now it’s time to think about your first step, and the next step after that. Ponder the gap between where you are now and where you want to be in the future. It may seem impossible, but it’s quite achievable if you take it step-by-step.

                        It’s important to revisit this vision from time to time. Don’t be surprised if your answers to the questions, your technicolor vision, and the resulting plans change. That can actually be a very good thing; as you change in unforeseeable ways, the best life you envision will change as well. For now, it’s important to use the process, create your vision, and take the first step towards making that vision a reality.

                        Featured photo credit: Matt Noble via unsplash.com

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