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Simple Ways You Can Be Happy Every Day

Simple Ways You Can Be Happy Every Day

We all strive to be happy. To have happiness resonate from our very being and to then spread that happiness to our loved ones every day. But often we don’t know how. We do know what it’s like to be happy, but how can we be happy every single day? We’ve read advice, yet we don’t have solutions. Well, here is your personal solution list to being happy every day!

1. Love yourself

You’re studying, you’re working, you’re worrying, you’re sorting out your life and seeing where you need to be next, you are just trying to make the best out of your life. But have you made yourself the best you’ve been? When did you last buy those roses you eye everyday? When did you last be your own best friend? Can you remember the last time you took care of yourself? If it’s been longer than a day, it’s time to change that. You are the best friend you can have. Give yourself the best love you can every day. Be it a longer shower, a ridiculous movie, a pastry you know you shouldn’t be eating, a walk in the park, a day at the beach, a quick preview of that book you haven’t gotten to, writing that article you’re so passionate about, or watching a scandalous reality show, whatever it is, as long as you love it. For, to love yourself is the first step to life long happiness.

2. Say Hi to the Outside World

The phone has become our instant mini world. We keep it out so often that we miss out on the real world. Every morning or evening or night put away your phone consciously for about 15 minutes and look around you. Notice the trees, the cars, the fountain, the houses and every time you do, I can bet that you’d see something you’ve never seen before. If nothing else, just walk or drive or take the subway and notice things around you, just for the sake of it, just because you can and because Facebook will always be there (presumably) but your surroundings might not.

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3. Absorb Like a Child

We look so much yet we gather so little. Every time you are out and about, don’t just ‘look’, observe. Observe the things around you, nature, concrete, humans, everything! The tilt of the trees, the fashion on the streets, the building in despair and everything in air. Observe like a child would. Why? Well, why not!?And when you do, you’ll realize that there is so much more life in the concrete, so many more emotions in nature and so much more warmth in humans than we thought there was and there is so much more to the way back home than just a subway stop

4. Sing to the Tunes of Your Body

Listen to your body, closely and carefully. Listen to your mind, your gut, your intuition. Everyday your body talks to you, responds to you. The sleep it gets, the food it consumes, the surroundings it faces, with every passing minute your body responds. Listen to what it says, is it telling to slow down? To take a break? To eat? To sleep? The more you push yourself the more you tire your body, the lesser you listen to yourself.If nothing else listen to your body to be the best at work. Respond to its needs and your body in turn will reward you with healthy system and sharper brain and a happier mind.

5. Let Go of Your Mistakes

So you made a mistake. That time you shouldn’t have called, the best friend you no longer talk to, your mom who you might have ignored or that dog you couldn’t help. It’s been days, if not weeks and it’s still eating at you. We all make mistakes some grave other small but a mistake none the less. Forgive yourself. You are much more than your mistakes. Your mistakes never have and can never define you, you are the only one who can define yourself. So let go of that burden you have to live with and make space in your heart and mind for better memories and maybe different mistakes because with every mistakes and every lesson, you’ve learnt to do something right. Happiness is not just about your achievements, it’s also the lessons your learnt from your mistakes.

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6. Love Yourself for Who You are Today

Wherever you are in life right now, is what you have and what you can work with, what you can change, what you can improve. Love yourself, your perfect, flawed self. Yesterday is mere memory and tomorrow is a hope, a plan but still just a figment of your imagination. Today, wherever you are, however you are, you’re one step closer to tomorrow. And if you want, one step closer to where you want to be. Don’t let yesterday, a mere figment of your memories hold you back. Recognize the power of today and live in the present for there is no force more powerful than a happy mind working today.   

7. Cut Out the Negative Baggage

Every negative vibe that you’ve felt, for every snarky criticism that you didn’t deserve, every unprompted shaming or name calling that you’ve endured, leaves you a little scared, a little hesitant, a little unsure. A lot of these, tear down your spirit and cut short your creativity, even hampering with your self-worth, and your self-esteem. Shun them. Let go of all the people in your life who make you feel anything less than the perfect and able individual that you know you are.  It might be difficult to do so, but do it for your happiness, for we all deserve nothing but the best and we owe it to ourselves to surround ourselves with people who believe the same.  

8. “Health is Wealth”

Work will always be there. Be it at home, in college, at the office, wherever it is, there will always be something to do. Another sad truth of life is that at a work place no one is indispensable. Working hard just enable us a little more security of our ability and bank balance but that’s it. The only thing that is indispensable to you is your health. Going back to the adage ‘no health, no wealth’, without a healthy lifestyle, a healthy body, mind and soul,  your work, your home but more importantly you suffer. Take up habits that enable you to have a healthy lifestyle and a healthier body,mind and soul.  The healthier you are the happier you’ll be. Eat right, exercise more, take breaks often to relieve stress and take up a hobby that give you joy. The healthier you are, the happier you’ll be.

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9. Listen to The Food Gods

With every meal you skip a blood cell dies. No, that’s not at all true, but it could be. The point is you need to eat to be productive and happy. Eat anything but eat something. A fruit, a sandwich, a burrito, whatever you fancy, but eating makes you healthier and happier and then you can kick ass at work! Every time you get an urge to skip food, think of how awkward it would be to have your tummy growl loudly when you’re presenting the material that you skipped food for.

10. Breathe

Every day is a cacophony of motion. The bus, the neighbor, the work place, the colleagues, the deli, everything is loud screaming to be heard and yearning to be ahead. It’s overwhelming and constantly in your face.Well then, how do you get ahead, how do you get happy? By breathing. One breathe at a time. Tune everything out and breathe. Just give yourself a minute and breathe, live in that minute and breathe. To live is to hear the noise, to live happily is to be able to breathe and flourish in those noises, to be loud enough to be louder than the other voices, and breathe enough to be ahead of them all.

11. Find your Happy Place

Remember when as children we used to hide inside our forts? We used to be so happy, so content. What happened to that? Why did we let go? Not because we got older, but because we got busier.We found excuses to escape feeling.  Find your happy place, it could be your home, a park, your room, your kitchen anything, as long as it makes you happy.  The ‘Happy Place’ as ridiculous as it may sound, is simply a space that lets you be vulnerable, insecure and emotional. For you, to be able to put aside your brave facade and let it all out. Every day visit your happy place,let go of everything that’s made you unhappy and feel the happiness seeping into your body. Let your happiness, your happy memories, your happy smiles just infiltrate every part of your body and then quipped with happy thoughts and a happy place go and face the brutal world.

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12. Go Out and Play

The sun, unless you’re in India, in 49 degree weather, makes everything happier, even your body. You get vitamin D, you can ditch the tanning salon, and most of all you get to connect with Mother Nature, be closer to the system that provides for all your basic needs. Be it a walk, or exercising or soccer or taking your dog out, whatever it is find an excuse to embrace the sun. To feel it’s warmth and the light it spreads to everyone on the planet.

13. Acknowledge Your Emotions

When you’re upset, or angry, or sad recognize it, acknowledge it and eliminate it. Most of us recognize our emotions but tend to ignore then in a pursuit of  being ‘cool’. Today the idea of emotions has become so overwhelming that we hide from them instead of acknowledging them. They get so bottled up that then we lash out, especially at our loved ones and then wonder ‘where did all that come from’. The trick to avoid that is to face your emotions everyday, resolve them everyday and then let go of them everyday. Everyday till you start doing it subconsciously, making you happier, more aware and a little more in control of your life.

14. Stop Comparing

Everyone has their shares of trouble, failures and success. More often than not we see people only at the peak of their careers, in less than a moment we assume that they are in some way ‘better’. That they did something that you haven’t, or that they are generally better than you. Take that thought and dump it out in the farthest garbage truck and never look for it again. Everyone is different. Some blossom faster, some slower, but everyone is unique and so are you. If you’re not where you want to be just yet, well, then work towards it. Success is never the end goal, it’s just a perception. Some people see success in raising happy kids, some see it in that bird house they made, some see it in the grades they got, some see it in their bank balance. Your success is how you define it and that defines your path to your happiness.

15. Be Content

Always remember, especially if you have the means to read this article, that you have something more than someone else. That, whatever you have, no matter how little it may seem to you, is more than what someone else has. No matter what your gender is, what your ethnicity, where you’re from or what you believe in, always be content with how much you have.  Be content with what you have and move forward. Being content is not synonymous with being complacent. To be ahead you cannot be complacent but to be happy you must learn to be content.

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Last Updated on December 17, 2018

Why You Think You’re Not Good Enough and How To Believe in Yourself

Why You Think You’re Not Good Enough and How To Believe in Yourself

Have you ever wanted to say something at work, but a little voice of doubt crept in and said, “what if you are wrong”?

Maybe you wanted to apply for that promotion or ask that special someone on a date, but something kept you from taking action. When you think you’re not good enough, you tend to fear the outcome and lack faith in your abilities. That is why it is vital you discover how to believe in yourself so you can accomplish your goals and create your dream life.

Whatever your situation, the fears and self-doubt your false beliefs create will always stop you in your tracks. Identifying the beliefs that cause you to sabotage your life is the first step to removing them.

Self-doubt causes inaction, and inaction leads to regret. When you are not following your passion and living your dream life, you are left with a lot of questions:

  • What if I took a chance on myself?
  • Could I have had a better life if I took more risks?
  • Am I be satisfied with the legacy I am leaving behind?
  • What could I have accomplished if I did not settle for less?

So why would you think you’re not good enough?

1. Parenting

The perception you have of yourself is based on your past experiences. There are studies that show children mimic everything from their parents ability to regulate emotions, to their parents belief about money.[1]

I have had clients who did not believe they were good enough because they did not receive any positive reinforcement as a child. When they were young, their parents were extremely overprotective.

Think of your childhood challenges like dragons you had to slay. Each obstacle you overcame was another dragon you successfully removed from your life. As you slay more dragons, your self-esteem and confidence increase. When someone has overprotective parents, their parents end up slaying the dragons.

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As a result, the child builds more confidence in their parent’s abilities, while still doubting their own.

If you are never encouraged to slay your own dragons, you start to doubt whether you can. It is only natural for a child to conclude their parents are always helping them because they think they need it. This child ages into an adult who still believes they are not good enough. They seek the help and confirmation of others, and they rarely stand-up to opposition.

Solution: Slay Your Dragons!

If you want to believe in yourself, you are going to have to take steps to rebuild your trust in yourself. Start by keeping your word to others and arriving on-time. By showing yourself that others can (and do) trust you, you are going to feel more comfortable trusting yourself.

As you move onto larger and more challenging tasks, you have built a foundation of trust in your ability to keep your word. Next, you are going to want to reclaim your sword from others. At first, you may want to confide in whoever it is currently slaying your dragons.

Understand if it is your parent or someone who loves you, they want the best for you and mean well. You are simply going to tell them that you want to do the work, and will ask them for their thoughts in the planning phase. Feel free to check in with them and give them updates on your progress, while making sure they understand you are wanting to do the work yourself.

Then when the task is completed, let them know so you can celebrate together. Now that you have slayed your own dragon, you can start to reclaim your confidence. By you utilizing them as your guide, you get the added bonus of someone you respect and admire, telling you how amazing you are.

Think of it like a symbolic passing of the torch. Now, you are both dragon slayers. Which means all the positive attributes you attributed to them slaying your dragons, now belong to you.

2. Over-Exaggerating and Oversimplifying

Your past experiences may involve you or someone close to you failing. When you experience failure, you can lose your desire to continue. This has less to do with whether you are brave or scared, and more to do with the fact that your mind does not like failure.

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No one enjoys participating in events in which they under-perform. Outside of the usual reasons of embarrassment, feelings of inadequacy, and fear of failure – it is simply not fun.

Who wants to play baseball if they strikeout every time it is their turn? Would you enjoy singing in front of an audience if you were booed off the stage every time you performed? I could go on, but I think you get the point.

The thing about those two examples is no one really strikes out “every” at-bat. It is also unlikely someone could be booed off the stage “every time” they performed in-front of an audience.

What ends up happening is you oversimplify and exaggerate your past experiences and then your mind believes you. If you believe you are not good enough to ask someone on a date because they “always” tell you no, then do not be surprised you never muster the courage to do so.

If you want to overcome these feelings of inadequacy, start by changing your beliefs. This exercise does not need to be complicated. If you believe you strikeout every time it is your turn, I want to you to go to a batting cage and keep swinging until you hit the baseball.

When you experience success, I want you to take a mental note, write it down, or have someone video it. This is your proof that you do not always strike out. Then, whenever your belief that you are not good enough resurfaces, you are going to replay that video.

Regardless of the situation, you can find a successful experience that you are overlooking.

Solution: Read About the Failures of Others

It sounds a little crazy, I know, but reading about the failures of other successful people will improve your confidence. In a study conducted by Columbia University, they found that teaching students about the failures of great scientists encouraged them to do better.[2]

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When you are battling fear and self-doubt, you tend to over-exaggerate the abilities of others and diminish your own by comparison. You start to believe the successful are successful because they are courageous risk-takers, who do not take no for an answer. You tell yourself, they are meant to succeed, while you on the other hand are not.

When you are able to relate to the successful, you start to realize they have the same struggles and challenges you do. The only difference is they kept going.

Now it is not a question of whether you can succeed, it is a question of whether you want to succeed.

3. Undervalue Yourself

What is the main difference between someone who believes they are good enough and someone who does not? The person who believes they are good enough understands they are a person of value.

What I mean by this is if you do not believe you are worth being listened to, you will not have anything to say. If you do not believe you are good enough to be respected and treated as such, you will accept and rationalize all kinds of mistreatment.

There is an old saying that we are treated as we allow ourselves to be treated. When someone has the confidence and self-esteem that commands respect, they will not accept being treated any kind of way. However, if someone does not see themselves as worthy, they will remain in toxic situations because they do not believe anything better is on the horizon.

Dr. Jennifer Crocker, who worked on a series of self-esteem studies, found in her latest research that:[3]

“College students who based their self-worth on external sources–including appearance, approval from others and even their academic performance–reported more stress, anger, academic problems, relationship conflicts, and had higher levels of drug and alcohol use and symptoms of eating disorders”

Solution: Internalize Your Self-Worth

Instead of valuing yourself based on the awards, recognition, and accolades of others, you need to search internally. By basing your perception of yourself on your core values, you can regain control over self-image.

Instead of focusing on things that are outside of control, keep your mind on what it is that makes you special. You are not defined by your job, relationships, religion, or education. Rather, you are defined by the manner in which you participate in these things. You may be a creative, hard-working, and compassionate person; and that shows up in every thing you do.

Understand that you do not need to be creative, hard-working, and compassionate all the time to consider yourself these things. You are not trying to be perfect, but you are trying to connect with your true self.

By understanding the similarities in which you tackle objectives, you will build a consistent and powerful self-worth that stands apart from external confirmation.

Final Thoughts

Do not allow your past experiences do dictate your future success. You do not want to look back on your life and have a lot of questions and regrets.

Build trust in yourself by taking action today. This will help you build the confidence you need to believe in yourself and your ability to become the champion of your life.

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Featured photo credit: Riccardo Mion via unsplash.com

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