Advertising
Advertising

How You Should Communicate with Cat-People and Dog-People

How You Should Communicate with Cat-People and Dog-People

A few weeks ago my partner and I were having one of those deep, tough discussions between two very different personalities who were trying to harmonize and understand each other as our lives were changing.

As we talked, the subject of our pets came up: How have they been faring as our lives have been evolving?

“The cats are fine.” I said. “It’s Bowser I’m worried about. It’s the difference between cats and dogs.”

And thus the inspiration for this article . . .

Are you a cat-person or dog-person?

Here are some characteristics of cats and dogs and the people who love them, followed by suggestions of how to make it all work!

Advertising

Cats

Cats are independent and low-maintenance. They don’t need to be taken out. All you need to do is keep up with the litterbox, feed them, and clip their nails when they start getting sharp. Cats are touch-and-go, sometimes cozying up to you and sometimes nowhere to be found.

They are sometimes curious about new people, sometimes indifferent, and they don’t ask for attention – they take it! They’ll sit on you, nuzzle you, walk across you, and love on you (or your laptop) – unless they are busy doing something else, of course.

If they haven’t seen you for a long while, they may come and greet you, but they don’t dwell on it. They’re cats.

Cats can be relatively persnickety about cleanliness – but if they’re upset about something, they’ll let you know with an unpleasant mess outside their box.

Cats do things their own way. They may come and sit on your lap — but don’t try to pick them up and put them there yourself — they are not in the mood just now. And if you get up from your chair, expect it to be the cat’s seat when you get back. Cats are easily bored but also easily entertained if you give them access to a window or a box.

They are great hunters but play around with their prey. Cats are also very sensitive and keenly intuitive. When I’m agitated, my cats get agitated and fight each other. When I’m depressed, they tend to come and cuddle. They seem to see and understand things beyond our human capabilities – but the joke is that they may not care enough to do anything about it.

Advertising

Are you a Cat-Person?

Cats work for me because they are independent and low-maintenance. As long as a person can stand the litterbox, cats are great.

I am not a homebody and like to get out often. I got two cats so that they can keep each other company and don’t need me around.

I like that I can stay out late or leave town for a bit, and the cats will still be calm and content when I return (as long as someone pops in once or twice to clean the litterbox and top off the food and water).

So then one day, I, the cat-person, got a dog . . .

Dogs

I discovered dogs can be dependent and high-maintenance.  I was dismayed to discover that there is a “puppy phase” – there is nothing like that for cats – and that’s when I began to refer to our pup as “your dog” and had nightmares that he would never ever grow up. (Thankfully he eventually did.)

Dogs need to be taken out many times a day. They also need to be fed — and once they get a taste of human food — they will hover around the kitchen and sniff around at your feet, in case some tasty morsel should fall.

Advertising

Dogs are loyal and loving and feel a need to be around you and know where you are at all times. My dog will follow me up and down the stairs and will bark at me frantically if I walk out the front door and get the mail without him.

Dogs are protectors, barking at anyone who comes within yards of the house and may go absolutely crazy if someone actually approaches the door — until they know for sure that you’ve accepted this person. Dogs may feel abandoned when you leave the house and are ecstatic when you return.

Dogs smell until you bathe them. And then they are quick to get dirty again. But they are incredibly loyal and loving.

They want to please you and will do whatever they can to get in your good graces. They can take a great amount of loving from kids and just want to play with you and love you – always.

If they could, they would sit on your lap — and some actually do, even though they shouldn’t. Dogs may not be as intuitive as cats, but they’re pretty smart, and some have been known to save lives.

Are you a Dog-Person?

Dog-people are content to be home. They like people, but they don’t need to be out and about, and they don’t understand why you would want to be away so much – there’s plenty to do in the house!

Advertising

Dog-people are caring, empathetic, and loyal. And like dogs, they just want to be around you, even if you’re both doing your own thing, not interacting with each other.

So, how do you keep from fighting like cats and dogs?

It’s easier than you might think!

If you’re living a cat-person, be sure to give your partner some space. The cat-person will want to go out and explore – but will want to cozy up to you, too.

Make sure to plan some exciting things to do together and be prepared for the occasional hijinks and drama. Be sure to give your cat-person attention . . . and be patient.

If you’re living with a dog-person, schedule some regular time together (date night!), and stay in communication about your outside activities as much as possible.

Be sure to show your appreciation for your partner’s loyalty, give positive feedback . . . and be patient!

Featured photo credit: Victor Hanacek via picjumbo.com

More by this author

10 Things Your Dreams Can Tell You About Yourself What Babies Would Say if They Had Twitter Accounts 17 Things Only Slow People Would Understand How You Should Communicate with Cat-People and Dog-People 27 Things Your Daughters Should Know by Age 10

Trending in Communication

1 How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide) 2 How to Improve Intimacy in Your Marriage and Rekindle the Passion 3 13 Simple Ways To Express Gratitude Daily 4 Why You Feel Lonely In Your Marriage And How To Deal With It 5 6 Signs Of A Controlling Person To Be Aware Of

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on April 14, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

Advertising

Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

Advertising

Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

Advertising

When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

Advertising

5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next