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How to Find The Courage to Walk Alone

How to Find The Courage to Walk Alone

We’d all like to believe we’re good people. I don’t think anybody wants to purposely be a dick—even terrorists are protecting and vindicating someone in their own mind. Since terrorism is merely a matter of perspective, what makes the difference between Batman and Joker? Both are solitary vigilantes. Why one man is considered a hero while the other is demonized as a villain is in itself a fascinating subject, but what really strikes me as interesting is the similarity between Batman and Joker: they both have the courage to walk alone.

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    A Traumatic Event

    Bruce Wayne became Batman after witnessing his wealthy parents’ brutal murder, while Joker is a born criminal turned criminally insane. On either side of the coin, these men experienced a traumatic event which forced them on a personal journey. While I wouldn’t wish trauma on anyone, it’s been my personal experience as well that a traumatic event triggered the personal journey needed to evolve into the activist I am today. Without that traumatic event, I would’ve just been your average white collar schmuck, Bruce Wayne would be another nameless one percenter, and Joker would be a statistic. Courage is a personal stat, and anyone who’s ever played a video game knows you have to use a stat to raise it.

    Learn more about trauma: What I Learned From Batman

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    A Personal Journey

    In order to gain courage, you must find a way to face your fears. Batman and Joker faced some of the darkest fears we have as human beings: death, the unknown, oblivion, infinity, darkness, and fear itself. I faced many of these fears myself. I’ve faced many of these dark corners of human existence, at one point channeling the collective consciousness through a preacher’s son by convincing him he’s a prophet. Facing these unknowable scenarios in life is essential to finding courage within yourself.

    Decide who you actually are, whether it’s a poet, parent, or prick; explore your own spirituality. Nothing else is more important than discovering who you truly are and what you really want out of life. Discovering your inner happiness and motivation is the first step toward walking alone—you can’t walk alone unless you know where you’re going.

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    Wanna go on a personal journey? Learn: 3 Highly Effective Ways to Become Happy, Awake, Fulfilled, and Free

    Brush Your Shoulders Off

    I don’t know how much experience you have stepping out of line, but for the uninitiated, let me assure you that you’ll be noticed. People want everything in order, but in order to progress, we have to keep evolving and pushing forward. If you want to walk alone, you’ll have to be ok with being noticed, and it won’t always be good notice either. Do you see Batman and Joker hanging out and partying with their high school friends? They don’t ask what people think about their plans either. These men consider all information in front of them, but they remain focused on the prize.

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    Staying focused is difficult, but luckily there’s a Lifehack for that. Discover: 10 Online Apps for Better Focus

    Smile Like You Mean It

    The first rule of life is to act like you belong there. The way to do that is to smile with confidence. As long as you’re confident and smiling, you can get through anything. Try being the first person on the dance floor; they’re the ones getting the party started. Until that one person dances, a dance floor is simply a floor, no matter how good the music is. Forget about how dumb you may look or what people may think of you, and smile like you’re living your life for yourself. Whether Batman or Joker, there’s only one way to become a legend: stand up for yourself, and walk alone.

     

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    Last Updated on January 18, 2019

    7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

    7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

    Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

    But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

    If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

    1. Limit the time you spend with them.

    First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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    In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

    Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

    2. Speak up for yourself.

    Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

    3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

    This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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    But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

    4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

    Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

    This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

    Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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    5. Change the subject.

    When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

    Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

    6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

    Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

    I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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    You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

    Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

    7. Leave them behind.

    Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

    If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

    That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

    You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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