Advertising
Advertising

Gratitude Leads to Happiness: Here’s How

Gratitude Leads to Happiness: Here’s How

Gratitude, being nice, thinking positively — these are all things that are easier to talk about than to practice. Being grateful is a habit that’s worth cultivating. Try out some of the following gratitude exercises and, with time, you will feel more gratitude in your everyday life.

“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.”

Denis Waitley

Advertising

1. Write a daily gratitude list

Before you start your day, at the end of each day or whenever you have a spare five to ten minutes, write a list of ten things you’re grateful for. They don’t have to be big things — just look around you and ask yourself, in this moment, what am I grateful for? Clothes to keep me warm, a hot cup of tea, good company … ?  If you do this every day, I can assure you that after a few weeks, or even days,  you will feel much happier .

2. Practice mindfulness for 10 minutes a day

Try this one for at least a week. Set 10 minutes aside each day and really focus on where you are in the moment. Look around you. What do you see, feel, hear? When we live life in a strict routine, we can slip into acting on autopilot which can leave us feeling numb, ungrateful and bitter about life. Practicing mindfulness takes you out of this and helps you to see life in a brighter, more pleasant light.

3. Observe life objectively

This one is certainly easier said than done, but make a conscious effort to be as objective as possible. Is the person you work with really that annoying or are you blowing matters way out of proportion? Take a step back and try to view situations from the outside rather than taking everything personally. In the long run you’ll feel a much deeper sense of gratitude in your daily life as a result.

Advertising

4. Reflect on your day before going to sleep

Before you go to sleep each night, thing about something great that happened to you in the day that just passed. Even if you think nothing amazing happened, think of something small you were grateful for. If you can’t think of anything, keep searching. Even if it’s ‘I love this pillow,” hold that thought and spend several minutes reflecting on how grateful you are, then let yourself drift peacefully to sleep.

5. Observe your thoughts for a week

What do you think about for the majority of the time? What do you spend most of your time talking to others about? Are you aware of this? A lot of the time, we drift through life with no idea where we’re putting most of our energy. Spend one week objectively observing your thoughts without judgement. You might like to write them down, then reflect on the exercise after the week is up. If you spend the majority of your time complaining, make a mental note to change your thinking habits. With time, you’ll find yourself being less negative and more objectively positive. Remember, thoughts act as affirmations when repeated enough. Be mindful of what you’re intentionally or unintentionally manifesting.

6. Replace complaints with compliments

You don’t have to go overboard with this one — after all sometimes a person just needs to vent — but next time you open your mouth to say something unconstructive or hurtful, reverse it. Aim to give a compliment a day. You’ll feel happier and more grateful.

Advertising

7. Read Man’s Search for Meaning

This is the ultimate book if you want to know how to be grateful. Viktor Frankl, a world-renowned psychologist, who was trapped inside a concentration camp during WW2, helps us all to see that life is a choice and that even in the most dire of circumstances, you always have the freedom to choose your mindset. It’s a powerful book that really makes you reconsider your place in life. If you don’t feel more grateful after reading this, then I’m not sure what else to suggest.

8. Meditate on gratitude

Close your eyes.  Start by focusing on your breath to calm your mind, then meditate on something you’re truly grateful for or someone you care deeply about. This could be a  memory you’re glad to have had or something in the present moment — anything to bring your mind back to a state of gratitude. The key here, as with all meditation practices, is consistency . Spending five minutes meditating each day can make a big improvement in your happiness.

9. Write a gratitude letter

Write a letter expressing gratitude for someone or something that is annoying to you.  Try to be grateful for what this situation is teaching you–find the lesson in it.  this will help to turn your thinking process in a positive direction, and will help you to accept and learn from things you might otherwise reject.

Advertising

10. Realize that gratitude is a choice

You’re in the driver’s seat of your life, and you can choose how to react and how to think.  If you’re committed to positive thoughts and attitudes, you will be happier, healthier and more fulfilled.

Featured photo credit: Young happy woman relaxing on green grass. via shutterstock.com

More by this author

Have You Ever Wished Your Kids Will Beg To Do Their Chores? 20 Things People Regret the Most Before They Die Overcoming The Pain Of A Breakup: 3 Suggestions Based On Science Quit Your Job If You Don’t Like It, No Matter What What Highly Successful People Do Every Day To Perform At Their Best

Trending in Communication

1 How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide) 2 The Hidden Power of Every Single Person Around You 3 The Purpose Of Friendship: The Only 4 Types Of Friends You Need In Life 4 14 Things That Make You Happy and Enjoy Life More 5 Focus On Yourself, Because Most Of The Time No One Really Cares

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on April 19, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

Advertising

Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

Advertising

Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

Advertising

When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

Advertising

5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next