Advertising
Advertising

7 Ways To Find The People Who Really Get You

7 Ways To Find The People Who Really Get You

There’s nothing better than surrounding yourself with people who understand you. Whether that means listening to your innermost thoughts or knowing just what you want for Chinese takeout, it’s nice to be around those who get you. If you’re still looking for those people, don’t fret! Here are seven ways to find people who really, truly understand you.

1. Do what you want to do.

If you want to sit around and watch the ducks at the park, go do that. And hey, you never know—there might be someone there doing the same exact thing. You never know who shares you interests or hobbies, so by doing what you want, you’re sure to find others who are doing that same thing for the same reason. Common interests are also a great starting point for any kind of relationship, be that a friendship or something more. I met my best friend in college at a free cupcake table in our freshman dorm. We bonded over the fact that we were the only ones who seemed to be eating more than one cupcake. She gets me.

Advertising

2. Join a club.

If you’re having trouble finding people who are interested in the same things you’re interested in, consider joining a club. You’d be surprised how many organizations there are for just about everything you could possibly imagine. Clubs also have the added benefit of structure. This means that you’re more likely to see the same people more than once since meetings or gatherings happen on a semi-regular basis.

3. Approach people.

You’re never going to get anywhere unless you become comfortable talking to people you don’t know very well (or at all)! In order for people to get you, they have to get to know you first. Be friendly, smile, make eye contact—you know the drill. People will appreciate the extra step you took to meet them, and they’ll remember you for it.

Advertising

4. Be outgoing.

No, you don’t have to talk to everyone and be super peppy. But try to be as approachable as possible. That way, people are more likely to come talk to you. Showing your interest in others is a great first step to making long-lasting friendships.

5. Be honest.

If you’re not totally into Star Wars, don’t say that you are just to make a new friend. I actually did that once, even though it had been years since I had seen the movies. My friend found out pretty quickly, and my punishment was to watch all of the movies in twenty-four hours. Though that turned out well for me in the long run (though that 24 hour period is one giant blur of lightsabers and droid noises), it doesn’t always end up that way. Be honest and open about who you are. After all, people can’t get you if you’re not acting like yourself.

Advertising

6. Participate.

I remember doing icebreakers exercises at camps when I was a kid. I hated them because I was worried I would say something stupid. Turns out, it was stupid to not participate, because I often ended up wondering who I could eat lunch with and was coming up blank. Remember that it’s important to engage with others and the group, even if it seems scary at the time. Putting yourself out there can reap some major benefits down the road.

7. Be optimistic.

It can be really frustrating to feel like you’re not getting anywhere with making friends. However, it’s not going to help if you’re pessimistic about the situation. Try to stay positive. If you’re down, other people will pick up on that and that might deter them from approaching you. On the other hand, staying positive will show others that you’re a confident, fun person (because you are!)

Advertising

Featured photo credit: *vlad* via flickr.com

More by this author

Maggie Heath

Maggie is a passionate writer who blogs about communication and lifestyle on Lifehack.

Why Do We Procrastinate? 9 Psychological Reasons Behind 9 Ways To Be Less Clingy In Your Relationship Useful Chart: Fruits That You Can and Cannot Let Your Dog Eat Nomnomnom! 4 Flavourful Cake Frosting Recipes That You Cannot Miss! 10 Blow Your Mind Surprises You Can Hide In A Cake!

Trending in Communication

1 How to Think Positive Thoughts When Feeling Negative 2 How To Trust Your Intuition When You’re Making a Decision 3 Why Negative Emotions Aren’t That Bad (And How to Handle Them) 4 What Is Self-Image (And How to Change It for a Happier Life) 5 11 Things Overachievers Do Differently

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on April 9, 2020

How to Think Positive Thoughts When Feeling Negative

How to Think Positive Thoughts When Feeling Negative

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

Advertising

Learn How to Surround Yourself With Positive People.

2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

Advertising

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

Advertising

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

Advertising

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

More Tips for Staying Positive

Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

Read Next