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5 Ways to Be a Real Life Superhero

5 Ways to Be a Real Life Superhero

When I was seven years old, I got the greatest Christmas gift ever. As I tore away the crisp, Santa-Claus-decorated paper, it revealed the most perfect present: a Batman costume, complete with belt and shoes. I ran, I jumped, I rolled, I climbed, I hid and I saved everyone in the house from all the dangers that the holiday season could bring. It was one of the best days of my life.

Ever since that day, I’ve been fixated on comic books and superheroes, their place as Modern Mythology, and all the ideals they bring: saving lives, fighting crime and making the world a better place.

As an adult, I realize I actually have the power to be a superhero. I may not be able to fly, grow claws or regenerate my limbs — but I can make a difference to someone’s life.

We all have the power to be a superhero to someone, even if we don’t have the spandex to go with it. Here are five ways you can be a real life superhero:

1. Use the Things You Have to Help Someone Without Them

Want to be a true superhero? This is the most important step. At its foundation, a superhero uses the things that they have to help those who don’t have them.

Batman used his supreme wealth to keep the citizens of Gotham safe. The Green Lantern uses his immense powers to save multiple universes on a daily basis, and Spiderman uses his web-slinging awesomeness to keep the people of New York safe.

Think about what it is that you can give that nobody else can.

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It could be your support, time, mentorship, a small gift or a thank-you card. Sometimes, even just the most innocuous social media message can bring someone out of the darkness and into the light.

It’s something that you have to give that can help another.

Stuck? Why not look at Kickstarter for ideas — or just simply pay someone a compliment?

2. Keep Yourself Healthy

You can’t be a superhero and not take at least take some care of your body. Unless you’re like Bruce Banner, and can transform into Lou Ferrigno when you spill the table salt, it’s a good idea to invest in your body.

Be proactive in looking after your body, and helping people will become easier. You will have clarity of mind, energy to accomplish any task and the strength to move whatever obstacles get in your way. It also means you look completely bad-ass if the chance to wear spandex ever comes around.

You don’t need to look like Thor, or have the abdominals of Wonder Woman to be a superhero for somebody. But investing in a gym membership or a pair of running shoes could be the difference between you being able to help someone or not.

Want to get in shape like a real superhero? Check out the Nerd Fitness Blog.

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3. Pick Your Fight

Every superhero has a battle. Something that drives them to be the person they are. That gives them not just a want to help people, but a reason why.

Batman and Spiderman both fought to protect other people’s families from the injustices that happened to their own. Captain America fought to be the soldier he was told he would never be and Charles Xavier fought for his belief in the mutant race.

What’s your fight?

It could be anything from blogging on the failures of the education system, or working towards helping reduce the number of homeless veterans on the street. The fight does not need to be big, but it needs to be powerful. It needs to drive you to get out of bed, do something and help people, even if it’s as niche as helping people weed their gardens effectively.

Can’t think? Try to picture what it is you feel is wrong with the world, or your hobby or your profession. When you find something that lights a fire in you, you’ve found your fight.

Then, try to sum it up in five words.

“Protect Gotham City from Evil,” for example.

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3. Make Someone’s Day

Real life superheroes go out of their way to improve the lives of all the people they encounter. They want to do whatever it is they can to turn someone’s bad day into a good one.

Thankfully, most bad days in the real world don’t involve someone trying to blow up the city, hold you hostage on a boat or creating a mutant army to band together and eradicate your species, so don’t worry about that.

But what small gesture, piece of help or amount of time can you give to someone to improve their lives?

You can’t make everyone’s day, every day of the week, but try to go out of your way to absolutely make someone’s day every once in a while. The Avengers will thank you for it.

4. Stay Optimistic

Superheroes can be labeled many things, but pessimistic isn’t one of them. They retain a clear sense of optimism and a will to succeed regardless of whatever is thrown their way. Even if there are no odds stacked in their favor.

Even when there were only 10 mutants left on the face of the Earth, Charles Xavier never indulged the thought of extinction. Through the fears, the doubts and unevenly stacked armies, he kept his faith in his beliefs and what he was trying to achieve.

Your optimism, hopes and beliefs will be challenged, but stay true to your course. Being as optimistic as possible will not only help you see it out to the end, but give strength to those around you.

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5. Don’t Do It for the Credit

Superheroes wear masks, not only for the protection of the people around them, but for the protection of themselves. They do not seek credit, fame or glory for their acts. They just want to get up, save the world and forget it ever happened.

Their fight transcends credit and accolades, but comes from deep within. Batman never hangs around for press interviews and Spiderman has swung off in to the distance before the first thank you has even been uttered.

The world loves Spiderman, but Peter Parker is nothing more to New Yorkers than an orphan living in a one-person bedsit. For the person behind the mask, there is nothing more than a sense of satisfaction for helping someone.

No matter what it is you do — whether it’s carrying someone’s shopping, or painting their house — never go into it with the motivation of, “What’s in it for me?” Think of it in terms of, “What’s in it for them?”

Now, which superhero will you be?

Featured photo credit: Eneas via flickr.com

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Last Updated on March 30, 2020

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

Have you ever walked into a room and felt like your nerves simply couldn’t handle it? Your heart beats fast, you start to sweat, and you feel like all eyes are on you (even if they’re really not). This is just one of the many ways that being self-conscious can rear its ugly head.

You may not even realize you’re self-conscious, and you may be wondering, “What does self-conscious mean?” That’s a good place to start.

This article will define self-consciousness, show how practically everyone has faced it at one point or another, and give you tips to avoid it.

What Does Self-Conscious Mean?

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, self-conscious is defined as “conscious of one’s own acts or states as belonging to or originating in oneself.”[1]

Not so bad, right? There’s another definition, though — one that speaks more to what you’re going through: “feeling uncomfortably conscious of oneself as an object of the observation of others.” For those of us who regularly deal with extreme self-consciousness, that second definition sounds about right.

There are many different ways self-consciousness can spring up. You may feel self-conscious around people you know, like your family members or closest friends. You may feel self-conscious at work, even though you spend hours every week around your co-workers. Or you may feel self-conscious when out in public and surrounded by strangers. However, you probably don’t feel self-conscious when you’re home alone.

How to Stop Being Too Self-Conscious

When you’re in the throes of self-consciousness, it’s nearly impossible to remember how to stop feeling that way. That’s why it’s so important to prepare ahead of time, when you’re feeling ready to tackle the problem instead of succumbing to it.

Here are a variety of ways to feel better about yourself and stop thinking about how others see you.

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1. Ask Yourself, “So What?”

One way to banish negative, self-conscious thoughts is to do just that: banish them.

The next time you walk into a room and feel your face getting red, think to yourself, “So what?” How much does it really matter if people don’t like how you look or act? What’s the worst that could happen?

Most of the time, you’ll find that you don’t have a good answer to this question. Then, you can immediately start assigning such thoughts less importance. With self-awareness, you can acknowledge that your negative thoughts are present and realize that you don’t agree with them.[2] They’re just thoughts, after all.

2. Be Honest

A lie that self-consciousness might tell is that there’s one way to act or feel. Honestly, though, everyone else is just figuring life out as well. There isn’t a preferred way to show up to an event, gathering, or public place. What you can do is be honest with your feelings and thoughts.[3]

If you feel offended by something someone says, you don’t have to smile to be polite or laugh to fit in with the crowd. Instead, you can politely say why you disagree or excuse yourself and find a group of people who you relate to better. If you’re nervous, don’t overcompensate by trying to look relaxed and casual — it’ll be obvious you’re putting on a front. Instead, nothing is more endearing than saying, “I’m a little nervous!” to a room of people who probably feel the exact same way.

On the same note, if you don’t understand why someone wants you to do something, question it. You can do this at work, at home, or even with people you don’t know well. Nobody should force you to do something you don’t want to do.

Also, even if you’re willing to do what’s asked of you, there’s nothing wrong with asking for more clarification. People will realize that you’re not a person to be bossed around.

3. Understand Why You’re Struggling at Work

Being self-conscious at work can get in the way of your daily responsibilities, your relationships with co-workers, and even your career as a whole. If you’re facing some sort of conflict but you’re too nervous to speak up, you may be at the whim of what happens to you instead of taking some control.

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If you’re usually confident at work, you may be wondering where this new self-consciousness is coming from. It’s possible that you’re dealing with burnout.[4] Common signs are anxiety, fatigue and distraction, all of which can leave you feeling under-confident.

4. Succeed at Something

When you create success in your life, it’s easier to feel confident[5] and less self-conscious. If you feel self-conscious at work, finish the project that’s been looming over your head. If you feel self-conscious in the gym, complete an advanced workout class.

Exposing yourself to what you’re scared of and then succeeding at it in some way (even just by finishing it) can do wonders for your self-esteem. The more confidence you build, the more likely you are to have more success in the future, which will create a cycle of confidence-building.

5. Treat All of You — Not Just Your Self-Consciousness

Trying to solve your self-consciousness alone may not treat the root of the problem. Instead, take a well-rounded approach to lower your self-consciousness and build confidence in areas where you may struggle.

Even professional counselors are embracing this holistic type of treatment[6] because they feel that the health of the mind and body are inextricably linked. This approach combines physical, spiritual, and psychological components. Common activities and treatments include meditation, yoga, massage, and healthy changes to diet and exercise.

If much of this is new to you, it will pay to give it a try. You never know how it will impact you.

If you’re feeling self-conscious about how your body looks, a massage that makes you feel great could boost your confidence. If you try a new workout, you could have something exciting to talk about the next time you’re in a group setting.

Putting yourself in a new situation and learning that you can get through it with grace can give you the confidence to get through all sorts of events and nerve-wracking moments.

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6. Make the Changes That Are Within Your Control

Let’s say you walk into a room and you’re self-conscious about how you look. However, you may have put a lot of time and effort into your outfit. Even though it may stand out, this is how you have chosen to express yourself.

You have to work on your internal confidence, not your external appearance. There’s nothing to change other than your outlook.

On the other hand, maybe there’s something that you don’t like about yourself that you can change. For example, maybe you hate how a birthmark on your face looks or have varicose veins that you think are unsightly. If you can do something about these things, do it! There’s nothing wrong with changing your appearance (or skills, education, etc.) if it’s going to make you more confident.

You don’t have to accept your current situation for acceptance’s sake. There’s no award for putting up with something you hate. Confidence is also required to make changes that are scary, even if they’re for the better. Plus, it may be an easier fix than you thought. For example, treating varicose veins doesn’t have to involve surgery — sometimes simple compression stockings will take care of the problem.[7]

7. Realize That Everyone Has Awkward Moments

Everyone has said something awkward to someone else and lived to tell the tale. We’ve all forgotten somebody’s name or said, “You too!” when the concession stand girl says to enjoy our movie. Not only are these things uber-common, but they’re not nearly as embarrassing as you feel they are.

Think about how you react when someone else does something awkward. Do you think, “Wow, that person’s such a loser!” or do you think, “What a relief, I’m not the only one who does that.” Chances are good that’s the same reaction others have to you when you stumble.

Remember, self-consciousness is a state of mind that you have control over. You don’t have to feel this way. Do what you need to in order to build your confidence, put your self-consciousness in perspective, and start exercising your “I feel awesome about myself” muscle. It’ll get easier with time.

When Is Being Self-Conscious a Good Thing?

Self-consciousness can sometimes be a good thing[8], but you have to take the awkwardness and nerves out of it.

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In this case, “self-aware” is a much better term. Knowing how you come off to people is an excellent trait; you’ll be able to read a room and understand how what you do and say affects others. These are fantastic skills for people work and personal relationships.

Self-awareness helps you dress appropriately for the occasion, tells you that you’re talking too loud or not loud enough, and guides a conversation so you don’t offend or bore anyone.

It’s not about being someone you’re not — that can actually have adverse effects, just like self-consciousness. Instead, it’s about turning up certain aspects of yourself to perform well in the situation.

Final Thoughts

When you’re self-conscious, you’re constantly battling with yourself in an effort to control how other people view you. You try to change yourself to suit what you think other people want to see.

The truth, though, is that you can’t actually control how other people view you — and you may not even be correct about how they view you in the first place.

Being confident doesn’t happen overnight. Instead, it happens in small steps as you slowly build your confidence and say “no” to your self-consciousness. It also requires accepting that you’re going to feel self-conscious sometimes, and that’s okay.

Sometimes worrying that there is a problem can be more stressful than the problem itself. Feeling bad for feeling self-conscious can be more troublesome than simply feeling it and getting on with the day.

Forgive yourself for being human and make the small changes that will lead to better confidence in the future.

More Tips for Improving Your Self-Esteem

Featured photo credit: Cata via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Merriam-Webster: Self-conscious
[2] Bustle: 7 Tips On How To Stop Feeling Self-Conscious
[3] Marc and Angel: 10 Things to Remember When You Feel Unsure of Yourself
[4] Bostitch: How to Protect Small Businesses From Burnout
[5] Psychology Today: Self-conscious? Get Over It
[6] Wake Forest University: Embracing Holistic Medicine
[7] Center for Vein Restoration: What Causes Venous Ulcers, and How Are They Treated?
[8] Scientific American: The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Aware

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