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4 Principles of Creativity You Should Use Every Day

4 Principles of Creativity You Should Use Every Day

Think about that moment when an idea strikes you. It’s inspiring. Whether you write, paint, sing, compose, or take photos, there are moments when it just flows. In that perfect moment it all comes together beautifully and you remember why you love being a creative. But more often than not, the creative process does not feel like floating on clouds. It involves a lot of discipline, routine, structure, habit, persistence, and self-control. These aspects of the process are not fun to implement, nor do they feel very inspirational, but they are what give creativity its backbone.

The following tips are four principles of creativity that every serious creative needs to put in place. They will help you position yourself and be ready when inspiration strikes.

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1. Build a resource pool of inspiration

Forcing creativity is like scraping nails on a chalkboard—the thought of it makes you cringe. So it’s pretty much impossible to will any form of creativity into being. But what you can do is give it optimal opportunity to flourish.

Think of creativity like you would any good old-fashioned wor out. No one day of pushups is ever fun, or easy, nor does it immediately get you ready for competition. It’s the collective process of day-to-day discipline that produces noticeable results. If you assemble a repertoire of creative insight that has been built up over time, your brain power, creative juices, and inspired strength gain consistent stability slowly every day. When you sit down to create, your muscle memory has already been gaining strength, so that when the time calls for activation, your creativity is ready to compete at full capacity. Your only job is a mild warm-up.

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2. Implement boundaries

Most creatives would say they could sit in a room and think every day, all day. The free flow of thought is usually how they stumble upon genius. Most creatives would also say that doing the same thing over and over, day in and day out, is boring and a major creative buzzkill. The best ideas are discovered when the brain is released into imaginative territory, and who would want to miss this potential for greatness? The problem is that creatives are typically really good at daydreaming and terrible at follow-through. They’re really good at thinking up the new and improved, but terrible at implementing them. At some point you have to stop thinking and start doing. Which is why one of the most important principles of creativity is to set limits, establish boundaries and implement schedules.

If you are a true creative, your genius ideas will never go away. What makes you genius is the way you think, not just the ideas you produce. By giving structure to this thought process, you allow the truly great ideas to come to completion. The time crunch forces your brain to let go of ideas you know won’t have legs to stand on, and you’ll have more time to give legs to the ideas that do. Eventually, over time, your brain will weed out the good ideas from the great.

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3. Set aside time for constructive feedback

It’s fun when people agree with you. It’s even more fun when they rave about how wonderful your work is. Who wouldn’t want this kind of feedback? The problem is that it leaves very little room for growth. If the only people you surround yourself with are the ones who constantly praise you, you never see your work beyond its comfort zone. Sure, it may feel like left-brain thinkers “don’t get it,” but what they do offer is constructive insight into the way the other half of the world thinks. The more well-rounded approach you take to your work, the better chance you have of standing back from it to see its genius ability, and not just your personal attachment. No creative creates a masterpiece so their art can impress the busted-up walls of a worn-out basement. But the trick is to find someone whom you trust completely, someone who will actually be constructive in their approach, rather than confrontational.

4. Stay teachable

You may be the world’s greatest singer, but I’m guessing changing a tire stumps you. You may be the Picasso of this generation, but I’m guessing boiling an egg stresses you out. You may speak four different languages, but marriage is the hardest language you’ve ever had to decipher. The point is, you will never know 100% of everything. To grow, understand, and evolve, in all areas of our lives, is what feeds our inspiration. The very act of learning stimulates our mind and fuels our hope to believe in what could be—and the unlikely is often the very thing to spark the deepest creativity. But you’ve got to approach life with humility and eagerness, and choose to see everything and everyone as a potential teacher. Besides, I’ve never heard of any creative dying after they’ve said, “I don’t know. How about you teach me?”

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“A student of life considers the world a classroom.”

-Harvey Mackay

Featured photo credit: Cuba Gallery via flickr.com

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Published on May 4, 2021

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

How to Spot Fake People?

When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

1. Full of Themselves

Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

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It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

3. Zero Self-Reflection

To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

4. Unrealistic Perceptions

Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

5. Love Attention

As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

6. People Pleaser

Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

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Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

8. Crappy friend

Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

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1. Boundaries

Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

4. Ask for Advice

If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

5. Dig Deeper

Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

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6. Practice Self-Care!

Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

Final Thoughts

Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

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Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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