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18 Signs You’re Extraordinary And You Don’t Even Know It

18 Signs You’re Extraordinary And You Don’t Even Know It

A newborn baby looks extraordinary in the parents’ eyes. However, since young, we’ve been taught to fit in with the rest of the world. We were told to be quiet, keep a low profile and not to be different. Otherwise, we would risk being ostracized. Soon, we forgot that we are extraordinary and we lost the unique voice that we have. Have you forgotten how extraordinary you are?

Here are 18 signs that remind you how extraordinary you are.

1. You read every day.

You believe in continuous learning. You are extraordinary because you invest time to improve yourself and your knowledge. Other people may see you as a bookworm or a nerd, but that shouldn’t discouraged you to read. One day, you will do something great with all the knowledge you have accumulated.

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2. You daydream and you dream big.

Most people are too busy to dream. You are extraordinary because you have dreams and aspirations. In fact, your dreams are so big that others see you as impractical and unrealistic. Some may even laugh at your dreams. But don’t let them stop you. You have a gift. Like Walt Disney and Steve Jobs, you have a vision that most others don’t have.

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3. You stop to think and reflect.

While everyone is rushing their work to meet deadlines, you stop and understand the underlying problem. Your colleagues think you are slow, inefficient and overly cautious. But you are extraordinary because you don’t follow instructions blindly. You challenge status quo and find the best way to do your work.

4. You cry when you watch a touching movie or listen to a beautiful song.

You have empathy. You understand how others feel. Others may think that you can’t handle your emotions well. But you are extraordinary because you let your emotions flow naturally and allow yourself to be touched by something beautiful.

5. You help others without expecting anything in return.

People think that you are silly to help others without asking anything in return. You are extraordinary because you don’t see everything in dollars and cents. You enjoy helping others and being kind. That makes you happy and feel good.

6. You mediate in the morning.

You know your relationship with yourself is as important as your finance, career and relationships with others. So you practice yoga, mediate and say positive affirmations in the morning. Other people think you are weird. But don’t most successful people like Oprah Winfrey, Jack Canfield and Hugh Jackman take time to mediate in the morning?

7. You listen more than you speak.

You choose to listen more than you speak, not because you are shy, quiet or boring. You have opinions, but you are open to other people’s opinions too and willing to understand where they are coming from. You are extraordinary because you listen attentively and are genuinely interested in learning more about others.

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8. You embrace and love failure.

Most people don’t like to fail. They rather be stagnant than risk failing. It’s not that you are a risk taker, careless or impulsive. You love failure because it tells you if you are on the right track. You are just testing to see what works and what doesn’t, so that you can decide what action to take next.

9. You are comfortable being alone.

You are independent. You have no problem eating alone, watching movie alone and going holiday on your own. Other people may see you as loner or anti-social. But you are just confident and comfortable with yourself. You don’t need constant attention and validation from others.

10. You don’t follow a strict routine.

Although you have a to-do-list, you don’t follow it a 100%. You get bored with routines easily, so you shake things up once in a while. Others may think you lack of self-discipline and self-control. But you are extraordinary because your life is never boring. You are always finding new ways to spice up your life.

11. You let go of things that don’t work.

People think you are a quitter because you give up too easily and lack of persistence. But in your mind, you are not giving up, you are just letting go of things that don’t work. Why continue to pursue something when you realize it won’t work for you or it’s not something that you want after all?

12. You take care of yourself before others.

Sometimes, others mistake you as selfish, indifferent and uncaring. But you are extraordinary because you see the importance of taking care of yourself first. You know you have to serve your needs and not be a liability for others. You don’t depend on other people to take care of you.

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13. You never stop asking questions.

You are inquisitive and curious. You want to know how things work and you don’t take things at face value. Others may find you bothersome and irritating. But you are extraordinary because you care about the world. You don’t ask for the sake of asking. You ask to understand more about the world, so as to make it better and be more appreciative of it.

14. You seldom express anger in front of others.

Sure, you get angry and irritated by people and things around you sometimes. But you hardly express anger because you are compassionate. You know it doesn’t feel good to be on the receiving end of someone else’s anger. Others may see you as a pushover or weak. However, you know the value of harmony, so you make the effort to preserve it.

15. You are positive and see beauty in everything.

You are easily inspired by others and the things around you. Others think you are overly positive and optimistic. But you are extraordinary because you believe there’s goodness in everyone. Although you know that there is always room for improvement, but you would rather focus on the positives and be happy, instead of dwelling on the negatives.

16. You consult your heart when making decision.

You know that something doesn’t feel right if your heart isn’t consulted when making decisions. Others see you are as unintelligent or too emotional. But you know that your heart is as important as your mind when it comes to decision-making. Both of them need to be in agreement, otherwise you won’t feel committed to take action.

17. You allow yourself to do what you love.

You are extraordinary because you don’t force yourself to do something you hate. People think that you are silly to spend so much time and money on your passion. But you know doing what you love makes you happy. You know your time and money aren’t spent, but rather invested in your happiness.

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18. You love yourself.

Most people blame themselves and others when things don’t go their way. You are extraordinary because you love yourself and treat yourself kindly. When something doesn’t work out, you ask yourself nicely for solutions. You don’t call yourself names and judge yourself.

Celebrate Being Extraordinary

It’s okay if you don’t match with the 18 signs above. Everyone is extraordinary in their own special way. So share your gift with the world. Don’t hide behind the curtain. It’s time to celebrate your unique self.

Featured photo credit: CIA DE FOTO via flickr.com

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

Reference

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