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14 Undeniable Lessons About Friendship From Saturday Night Live

14 Undeniable Lessons About Friendship From Saturday Night Live

A truly iconic tv show, Saturday Night Live has been on the air for an incredible 40 seasons. Starting in 1975, this sketch show has always strived to bring the spirit of New York comedy to the world. Not only becoming one of the longest running shows on television, Saturday Night Live has also launched some incredible careers. Eddie Murphy, Adam Sandler, Tina Fey, Julia Louise-Dreyfus and Amy Poehler all found their start on this innovative show, but the magic of SNL reaches even farther than that. Over several decades, SNL has made us laugh and even taught us a few things about life. Since Saturday Night Live players are famous for collaborating together throughout their careers, SNL has particularly strong things to say about the enduring bond of friendship.

1. Fight Through Breaks

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    Everyone experiences times when they struggle to connect with their friends, or have to work through disagreements. In comedy, “breaking” means laughing in the middle of a sketch. Appropriately enough, a performance has to move on, so cast members must fight through the break. Just like real life, our friendships are more important than little bumps in the road, and it’s important to keep going.

    2. It’s Ok To Be Up Front

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      The truest friends will accept you exactly as you are – though that might not mean a speedo to the office.

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      3. Share The Stage

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        Big names and new talents tend to collide on Saturday Night Live, yet the show consistently retains it’s ensemble feel. Much like relationships, if one person is always the centre of attention, the group will be less effective. A strong reminder for all of us to make our friends feel included.

        4. It’s Ok To Be Weird

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          Weirdness is a constant occurrence on Saturday Night Live. Similarly, some of our best friends come from people we first judged to be a little bizarre. A solid reminder that eccentricities shouldn’t stand in your way when getting to know a new friend.

          5. Laugh At Yourself

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            After Saturday Night Live cast members leave the show, many find success in Hollywood. So many cast members making the switch to the West coast led to the rise of The Californians segment. A biting satire of self obsession in the golden state, this recurring segment reminds us that friendships function best when you stay down to earth.

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            6. Stand By Each Other

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              For a show that’s employed so many comedians, impressively few have been rumored to hate each other. With so many strong personalities, this show truly speaks to appreciating everyone for who they are.

              7. Unexpected Situations Bring The Best Rewards

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                Originally brought on to SNL as a writer, Tina Fey didn’t like being on camera, and stuck to background roles in sketches. One year, when the show couldn’t find a cohost they liked for the Weekend Update segment, the show’s producer asked Tina to audition. From there, she became a mainstay on the show. Audiences will remember her spot on imitation of Sarah Palin, but that too is another situation Tina Fey originally shied away from. Days before the first Sarah Palin sketch, Tina’s child mistook the real Sarah Palin on TV for Tina Fey, convincing Tina she could accurately portray the politician. Two career changing decisions that were completely unexpected, show us that our chance meetings can indeed become important friends.

                8. Embrace Creativity

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                  SNL is consistently original, quirky and creative. A winning recipe for success, friendships too are an important place where we should be creative. Gift giving, weekend plans and random outings are all most enjoyable for everyone when you’re not afraid to get a little wacky.

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                  9. Be Welcoming

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                    Saturday Night Live brings in new cast members nearly every season, yet newcomers often rise quickly to the top. Just like SNL, being welcoming with your friends and acquaintances will lead you to better, more developed relationships.

                    10. Love Your Found Family

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                      Bringing in so many different talents from around the country undoubtedly presents challenges for SNL’s production staff. Despite this, cast members regularly give a strong impression of working as one. Being open to new people and fully embracing your friendships is crucial to feeling supported in life. Loving your friends, and treating everyone as family, is another powerful lesson from Saturday Night Live.

                      11. Never Rule Out The Little Guy

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                        Many SNL sketches’ biggest laughs come from cast members who may not be stars of their season. Just like overlooked cast members bringing unforgettable performances to the table, our less outgoing friends deserve just as much attention and care as everyone else in our lives.

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                        12. New Friends Are Important

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                          Over and over again, the funniest cast members are untested talents. New members of this show have a lot to offer, as do new acquaintances and friends. You never know who will be your closest friends in the future.

                          13. Encourage Each Other

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                            Beloved comedy duos frequently rise to the top of audience’s hearts on Saturday Night Live. From Tina Fey and Amy Poehler to Will Ferrel and Kathryn Hahn, our favourite moments often come from two cast members working together. Don’t forget to encourage your friends and work together – sometimes two heads really are better than one.

                            14. Don’t Be Afraid To Look Stupid

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                              Just like embracing odd characters, we shouldn’t be afraid of being our truest, most stupid selves with our friends. Comedy often requires an actor or actress willing to look silly, but can produce a spectacular moment. Be brave enough to be kooky with your friends, even if you sometimes look a little dumb.

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                              Alicia Prince

                              A writer, filmmaker, and artist who shares about lifestyle tips and inspirations on Lifehack.

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                              Last Updated on August 6, 2020

                              6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

                              6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

                              We’ve all done it. That moment when a series of words slithers from your mouth and the instant regret manifests through blushing and profuse apologies. If you could just think before you speak! It doesn’t have to be like this, and with a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy to prevent.

                              “Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

                              Are we speaking the same language?

                              My mum recently left me a note thanking me for looking after her dog. She’d signed it with “LOL.” In my world, this means “laugh out loud,” and in her world it means “lots of love.” My kids tell me things are “sick” when they’re good, and ”manck” when they’re bad (when I say “bad,” I don’t mean good!). It’s amazing that we manage to communicate at all.

                              When speaking, we tend to color our language with words and phrases that have become personal to us, things we’ve picked up from our friends, families and even memes from the internet. These colloquialisms become normal, and we expect the listener (or reader) to understand “what we mean.” If you really want the listener to understand your meaning, try to use words and phrases that they might use.

                              Am I being lazy?

                              When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, a strange metamorphosis takes place. People tend to become lazier in the way that they communicate with each other, with less thought for the feelings of their partner. There’s no malice intended; we just reach a “comfort zone” and know that our partners “know what we mean.”

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                              Here’s an exchange from Psychology Today to demonstrate what I mean:

                              Early in the relationship:

                              “Honey, I don’t want you to take this wrong, but I’m noticing that your hair is getting a little thin on top. I know guys are sensitive about losing their hair, but I don’t want someone else to embarrass you without your expecting it.”

                              When the relationship is established:

                              “Did you know that you’re losing a lot of hair on the back of your head? You’re combing it funny and it doesn’t help. Wear a baseball cap or something if you feel weird about it. Lots of guys get thin on top. It’s no big deal.”

                              It’s pretty clear which of these statements is more empathetic and more likely to be received well. Recognizing when we do this can be tricky, but with a little practice it becomes easy.

                              Have I actually got anything to say?

                              When I was a kid, my gran used to say to me that if I didn’t have anything good to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. My gran couldn’t stand gossip, so this makes total sense, but you can take this statement a little further and modify it: “If you don’t have anything to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

                              A lot of the time, people speak to fill “uncomfortable silences,” or because they believe that saying something, anything, is better than staying quiet. It can even be a cause of anxiety for some people.

                              When somebody else is speaking, listen. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying, think about it, and respond if necessary.

                              Am I painting an accurate picture?

                              One of the most common forms of miscommunication is the lack of a “referential index,” a type of generalization that fails to refer to specific nouns. As an example, look at these two simple phrases: “Can you pass me that?” and “Pass me that thing over there!”. How often have you said something similar?

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                              How is the listener supposed to know what you mean? The person that you’re talking to will start to fill in the gaps with something that may very well be completely different to what you mean. You’re thinking “pass me the salt,” but you get passed the pepper. This can be infuriating for the listener, and more importantly, can create a lack of understanding and ultimately produce conflict.

                              Before you speak, try to label people, places and objects in a way that it is easy for any listeners to understand.

                              What words am I using?

                              It’s well known that our use of nouns and verbs (or lack of them) gives an insight into where we grew up, our education, our thoughts and our feelings.

                              Less well known is that the use of pronouns offers a critical insight into how we emotionally code our sentences. James Pennebaker’s research in the 1990’s concluded that function words are important keys to someone’s psychological state and reveal much more than content words do.

                              Starting a sentence with “I think…” demonstrates self-focus rather than empathy with the speaker, whereas asking the speaker to elaborate or quantify what they’re saying clearly shows that you’re listening and have respect even if you disagree.

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                              Is the map really the territory?

                              Before speaking, we sometimes construct a scenario that makes us act in a way that isn’t necessarily reflective of the actual situation.

                              A while ago, John promised to help me out in a big way with a project that I was working on. After an initial meeting and some big promises, we put together a plan and set off on its execution. A week or so went by, and I tried to get a hold of John to see how things were going. After voice mails and emails with no reply and general silence, I tried again a week later and still got no response.

                              I was frustrated and started to get more than a bit vexed. The project obviously meant more to me than it did to him, and I started to construct all manner of crazy scenarios. I finally got through to John and immediately started a mild rant about making promises you can’t keep. He stopped me in my tracks with the news that his brother had died. If I’d have just thought before I spoke…

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