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12 Unexpected Ways To Boost Self-Confidence You Should Try

12 Unexpected Ways To Boost Self-Confidence You Should Try

In order to boost self-confidence, you need to own your self-confidence. Do you depend too much on others’ opinions of you? Are you crushed by an inconsiderate statement from a co-worker? Scrap that way of thinking and know everything is on you. Only YOU have the power to be confident, and to help your confidence grow. Once you own it, try out these simple, unexpected ways you can boost your self-confidence even higher.

1. Look good.

You know how uncomfortable you feel when you wear dress shoes that are too stiff to move your toes, or a high-necked shirt, or anything else that doesn’t make you feel like your true self? It’s hard to be confident when you’re uncomfortable! Now imagine how comfortable you feel in your worn-in jeans and favorite t-shirt. Totally different, right? You feel sure of yourself because you feel like yourself. Looking good isn’t just about looking polished and put together – looking good is about feeling good! Make sure you’re wearing clothes that fit you well and look nice on you. Style your hair in a flattering way, brush your teeth until they shine, pluck and groom and do whatever you need to look good, and you’ll feel confident!

2. Smile in the mirror.

It sounds silly, but it helps! Instead of brushing your teeth and then frowning at your reflection, smile! Even if you don’t like what you see, a smile will help turn your attitude around. Even if you start with a fake smile, the action itself will affect you, and before you know it that smile will reach your eyes and turn genuine. Also know smiles make people look more attractive, so this goes hand in hand with looking good! Smiles make you more appealing to others, so if you smile as you walk the halls at work or check out at the grocery store, you’re more likely to feel confident because other people will smile back at you.

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3. Change your body language.

Everyone criticizes tall people who fold themselves into parenthesis, and it’s true – posture and body language say a lot about your confidence level! If you’re tall, stand proud! If you’re short, own every inch! Own your body and stand and walk proudly in it. Also, don’t act meek – not only will others think you’re timid, you’ll start to feel that way yourself! If you shoot your hand up to talk in a meeting, or go out of your way to get attention to speak to someone, you’ll come across as confident, and start to feel that way yourself – even if you’re just acting!

4. Think positive.

How you think influences so much about yourself, your day, your attitude, and your confidence. If you always expect the worst, then you’re more than likely always hunched over with a sad look on your face, defeated before you even begin. If you worry all the time, your fingernails might be bitten to the quick and your lip chewed until it bleeds. Thinking positive means you have faith in yourself, which will not only affect your body language, but changes your brain around. Instead of worrying about a work presentation, you might even be excited for it because you know it’s time for you to show off all you can do!

5. Kill negative thoughts.

This sounds like another way to word “think positive,” but it’s different! Killing negative thoughts means you don’t allow negative thoughts to take over your mind. Sometimes thinking positively seems too hard because you’re already down in the dumps and it seems impossible to climb out. Instead of getting to that point, be proactive and kill negative thoughts as they occur. When you find yourself thinking “This is too hard. I can’t do it. I’m going to go play a game instead,” squash these thoughts as if it were a bug! Replace it with a positive spin like, “This is so hard, but I’m going to do it to prove I can.” Instead of feeling like you have to pull yourself out of the dumps, you’ll feel like you’re conquering negativity and giving yourself an extra push ahead.

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6. Learn to accept failure.

If you got passed over for a promotion at work, don’t get depressed about it. Accept it as a failure and move on. The quicker you can accept and move past failure, the quicker you will be able to improve yourself and reach for bigger and better goals next time. Letting failure cripple you will make you insecure overall, and make it harder for you to boost your confidence later.

7. Improve your emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence (also called “EQ”) is the ability to evaluate and control your emotions, and better understand others’ emotions. Some people think EQ is just as important as IQ, because it’s so important for social interactions and relating to other people. If you can better understand and control your emotions, you’ll feel more confident in daily life because you won’t worry about breaking down when the going gets tough, or flying off the handle if your boss yells at you. It also helps because you’ll feel stronger and you will more easily relate to those around you, which will make you feel confident because people will come to you for advice and a listening ear.

8. Practice proficiency.

The better you are at what you do, the more confident you’ll feel about it. Think of how satisfied you feel when you go to work, do your best, and go home knowing you’ve made a difference that day. You can do this in every aspect of your daily life by practicing what you do, studying, and trying to find new ways to make things easier to do while producing better results.

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9. Avoid perfectionism.

No one is perfect, so don’t pressure yourself to do everything right. This goes along with accepting failure, because you need to know you don’t have to be perfect. It’s ok to send out an email with a typo in it – don’t beat yourself up! Correct yourself, or make sure to double-check next time. If you don’t expect yourself to be perfect all of the time, you’ll feel less pressure, so you’ll be more comfortable in your skin – and more confident in your abilities!

10. Celebrate your achievements.

Don’t be afraid to pat yourself on the back when you meet a goal! Even if it’s the easiest item on your to-do list, recognize you have accomplished it and get pleasure from that. Sometimes you might be the only one who acknowledges any success. Don’t depend on praise from your boss, or even family members. If you congratulate yourself for your achievements, then you’ll be giving yourself a confidence boost that will push you to accomplish even more in the future.

11. Do a good deed.

What makes you feel better than doing something nice for someone else? You can volunteer, give your change to a homeless person on the street, pay for the order of the person behind you, or even give an honest compliment. Making someone else feel good is going to make you feel good in return. Once you start doing good deeds, you’ll find they come easily, and improving others’ days so often will definitely make you feel more confident!

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12. Seek your passion.

How happy do you feel when you’re doing what you love? Are you passionate about art, or writing, or interior design? Or even your job? Find what you love to do, and make as much time to do it as you possibly can. Doing something you love and are good at will make you feel confident because you feel proud of yourself and productive with what you’ve done. This will help boost your confidence so you’ll excel in other areas of your life, also!

Featured photo credit: NomadicLass via flickr.com

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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