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10 Things You Cared about Growing up 10 Years Ago but Don’t Now

10 Things You Cared about Growing up 10 Years Ago but Don’t Now

Ahh, young adulthood—full of changes, inquiries and experiences. We all turn out differently, but there are some common “coming of age” themes in most of our lives. Check out these ten things that most of us worried about at some time or another, and be thankful for the wisdom and reassurance that comes with experience!

1. You wanted to be doing what the “cool kids” were doing.

There was a group of “those kids” in everybody’s lives growing up. It doesn’t matter if, ten years ago, you were in middle school, high school, college or already starting your first grad job—there’s a clique everywhere you look. For some reason, they set the standard for what was cool and for an even stranger reason, we all listened.

2. You wondered if you’d ever meet ‘the one.”

Chances are, you’ve now met “the one,” or one of them, or you’re just happily living your life and not letting it be ruled by your relationship status. Either way, hopefully you’ve learned to love yourself and know that your self worth isn’t determined by a big, white, Cinderella wedding.

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3. You needed to know if you were “normal.”

You are. What’s “normal,” anyway? Whenever anybody says to me, “I’d give anything to go back to my teenage years” I think, “really?” I, for one, am thrilled to have moved past the raging hormones and constant self doubt that growing up brings.

4. You were worried about saying / doing / wearing the “right” thing.

See above: “what’s normal, anyway?” The right thing and not following it could be ammunition against you in your younger years. Now you’re free to nerd out to whatever you’re passionate about and not give a flying saucer over who cares.

5. You longed to get your parents off your back.

…and move out, be free to “LIVE MY OWN LIFE FOR ONCE MUM, GOD!” Now you’d trade in your mortgage stress and kids’ school fees for five minutes of adolescent freedom. It’s all worth it though, right?

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6. You weren’t sure if you were on track with other people of your age/ gender/ peer group.

You were, but that didn’t stop you from obsessing over the things that felt so secret and weird that you’d die if anybody else found out. Somewhere on the path to adulthood, the track meandered off in several different directions, and we all stopped worrying about extreme conformity.

7. You cared what your Myspace profile said about you.

Now, it’s all about Facebook / Twitter / Your Wellness Blog / what that picture of your dinner says about you! I kid, but hopefully for most of us, there’s less pressure to manage our online presence in a “how cool am I!” kind of way. I do feel for today’s teens, growing up in a world completely saturated with online social sharing.

8. You listened to what your “frenemies” said about you.

We’ve all been there with the toxic relationships and BFFs that actually weren’t. As you got older, you realized the benefit of healthy relationships and (hopefully) ditched those out to sabotage you.

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9. You didn’t know what you were going to do with your life.

Ten years ago, the idea that your interests, skills and talents might change was a foreign one. You needed to know how your life was going to play out and what you were going to “be” when you grew up. Now, you’re too busy living, changing and adapting. One of the best things about maturing is realizing that life is what you make it. Fancy a career change? Go for it—the world is your oyster!

10. You wanted to know “what it all meant.”

Young adulthood is full of new experiences and one of the things that makes us human is trying to make sense of those experiences. You may have been worried that everything had to have a significant meaning or be an indicator of your future. Now, you’re more happy to go with the flow and recognize that, sometimes, a new idea is just that—it doesn’t have to reshape the fiber of your very being!

Here’s to growing up, fond memories and living with hindsight. What changes do you think will take place for you in the next ten years? What do you worry about now that you secretly suspect will just be another phase?

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Featured photo credit: Picjumbo via picjumbo.com

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Last Updated on June 19, 2019

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

I’ve stood on the edge of my own personal cliffs many times. Each time I jumped, something different happened. There were risks that started off great, but eventually faded. There were risks that left me falling until I hit the ground. There were risks that started slow, but built into massive successes.

Every risk is different, but every risk is the same. You need to have some fundamentals ready before you jump, but not too many.

It wouldn’t be a risk if you knew everything that was about to happen, would it? Here’re 6 ways to be a successful risk taker.

1. Understand That Failure Is Going to Happen a Lot

It’s part of life. Everything we do has failure attached to it. All successful people have stories of massive failure attached to them. Thinking that your risk is going to be pain free and run as smooth as silk is insane.

Expect some pain and failure. Actually, expect a lot of it. Expect the sleepless nights with crazy thoughts of insecurity that leave you trembling under the covers. It’s going to happen, no matter how positive you are about the risk you are about to take.

When failure hits, the only options are to keep going or quit. If you expect falling into a meadow of flowers and frolicking unicorns, then you’re going to immediately quit once you realize that getting to that meadow requires you to go through a rock filled cave filled with hungry bats.

2. Trust the Muse

Writing a story isn’t a big risk. It’s really just a risk on my time. So when I start writing a story, I’m scared it will be time wasted. Of course, it never really is. Even if the story doesn’t turn out fabulous, I still practiced.

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When I’ve taken risks in my life, the successful ones always seemed to happen when I followed the muse. Steven Pressfield describes the muse,

“The Muse demands depth. Shallow does not work for her. If we’re seeking her help, we can’t stay in the kiddie end. When we work, we have to go hard and go deep.”

The muse is a goddess who wants our attention and wants us to work on our passion.

If you’re taking a risk in anything, it’s assumed that there is some passion built up behind that risk. That passion, deep inside you, is the muse. Trust it, focus on it, listen to it.

The most successful articles and stories I write are the ones I’ve focused all my attention on. There were no interruptions during their creative development. I didn’t check my phone or go watch my Twitter feed. I was fully engaged in my work.

Trust the muse, focus your attention on your risk, let the ideas and path develop themselves, and leave the distractions at the side of the road.

3. Remember to Be Authentic

Taking a risk and then turning into something you’re not, is only going to lead to disaster. Whether you are risking a new relationship or new opportunity, you must be yourself throughout the entire process.

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How many times have you acted like you loved something just because the men or woman you just started going out with loved it?

For example, I’m not an office worker. I have an incredibly hard time working in a confined timeline (ie. 9-5). That’s why I write. I can do it whenever the mood strikes, I don’t have somebody breathing down my neck, telling me that I’m five minutes late, or missed a comma somewhere. I don’t have to walk on eggshells wondering if what I’m writing will get me fired or make me lose a promotion. I can just be myself, period.

One girlfriend didn’t understand that. She believed solely in the 9-5 motto, specifically something in human resources because that was a very stable job. I was scared for my future, but I stuck with the relationship because of my own insecurities and acted like I would do it to make her happy.

Here’s a tip: NEVER take away from your happiness to make somebody else satisfied (note I didn’t say happy).

Making somebody else happy will make you happy. Doing something to satisfy somebody is murder on your soul.

4. Don’t Take Any Risks While You’re Not Clearheaded

I’d been considering the risk for a couple weeks. It all sounded good. I was 22 and I could be rich in a couple of years. That’s what they were selling me, anyways.

One night, while at a house party with some friends, I found myself at a computer. A couple of my friends were standing nearby and asked me what I was doing. I told them I was considering starting my own business and it was only going to cost me $1,500.

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Of course, when a bunch of drunk people are surrounded by more drunk people, things get enthusiastic. It sounded like the best business venture in the world to everybody, including me. So I signed up and gave them my credit card number.

A few painful months and close to $4,000 dollars lost later, I quit the business. I was young and fell into the pyramid scheme trap. It was an expensive drunk decision.

Drinking heavily and making decisions has a proven track record of failure. So when you have something important to decide, don’t let your emotions take over your brain.

5. Fully Understand What You’re Risking

It was the start of my baseball comeback. I got a tryout with a professional scout and killed it. After the tryout, he talked to my girlfriend and myself, making sure we understood I would be gone for up to 6 months at a time. That strain on the relationship could be tough.

We understood. I left to play ball, chose to stay in the city I played in, and a year later we broke up. Not because of baseball, see point 3 above. Taking big risks can have massive impacts on everything in your life from relationships to money. Know what you’re risking before you take the risk.

If you believe the risk will be worth it or you have the support you need from your family, then go ahead and make the leap.

You can get more guidance on how to take calculated risks from this article: How to Take Calculated Risk to Achieve More and Become Successful

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6. Remember This Is Your One Shot Only

As far as we know officially, this is our one shot at life, so why not take some risks?

The top thing people are saddened by on their deathbeds are these regrets. They wish they did more, asked that girl in the coffee shop out, spoke out when they should have, or did what they were passionate about.

Don’t regret. Learn and experience. Live. Take the risks you believe in. Be yourself and make the world a better place.

Now go ahead, take that risk and be successful at it!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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