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10 Things Extremely Boring People Do

10 Things Extremely Boring People Do

Everybody knows one, maybe a handful if you’re unlucky: boring people seem to be omnipresent, and while they’re certainly not harmful, they can be dull, dreary, and not very good company in any circumstance. Is it the fact that they seem to be self-involved and self-directed? Is it that boring people never seem to want to try anything new, even if it’s just a song or a film or somewhere different for lunch? Or is it that boring people never seem to be good at telling a story?

Whatever it is, here’s a top-ten guide to what the extremely boring people of the world always seem to do. Take it as a cautionary tale to avoid doing the same.

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1. They always talk about themselves – and only themselves

Boring people always seem to find themselves the most interesting point of conversation. They never think about what might be interesting to other people, or about the issues or viewpoints of the rest of the world. Boring people just can’t get beyond the viewpoint that if it doesn’t immediately effect them or their immediate family, then it can’t be of note. Nothing is worse than a boring person who cannot stop but talk about themselves, or always manages to circle the conversation back around to their views and opinion.

2. They never expand their personal horizons

Boring people always stay stuck in their ‘hinterlands’ – their own personal, psychological and physical boundaries. They never try anything new, or adventurous, or potentially amazing for fear of failing somehow or for finding that they don’t like the aim of their experiment. It never occurs to a boring person that they would connect more with different people and different experiences and improve their quality of life by expanding their horizons.

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3. They cannot tell a good joke

Yawn. There’s a reason boring people are never called upon as the jokers and the fun-makers of any office party or social setting. Boring people just cannot tell a good joke to save their lives, largely because they don’t engage themselves in any situations that allow them to experience something fun. They spend too much time in the same old routines, with the same old stuff day in day out. When the greatest joke you have in your arsenal is something you pulled out of your cracker last Christmas, then you need to revise your priorities to avoid becoming one of the boring people.

4. They never practise or use empathy

Boring people are pretty bad on the empathy scale, always failing to see things from someone else’s point of view. Oh, they might well understand that someone else has a different point of view, but in terms of actually stepping inside someone else’s shoes and feeling… well, anything, boring people have their work cut out for them. For them, their world begins and ends at their front door and office, ensuring that the chance to go out and experience a modicum of empathy for anyone else is sadly, low at best.

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5. They never have a real opinion on anything

Yes, boring people can’t express a real opinion on anything. They have no real passions or loves in their lives, and, as the sign of a life well and truly being ruined, they spend no time in getting informed about anything of real worth. The events of the world pass them by completely, and this is of no consequence to the boring individual.

6. They stay in the exact same routine every day

The same routine, day in day out. Is there anything more depressing? Well, for the boring person, they never consider to try something new or expand their horizons. They wake up at the same time every day, eat the same stuff, do the same stuff, and just never want to change anything, even down to having something different for breakfast that day.

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7. They never do anything fun in their lives

Not that this going without saying, but boring people just never have any fun. They never explore what truly makes them happy and what makes them tick – therefore they spend all time either working or doing stuff that they don’t enjoy doing. They never consider that life is supposed to be fun and full of enjoyment, and instead put it off in lieu of working non-stop. Boring people never stop to smell the flowers, and that’s truly sad more than anything.

8. They complain about their lives

Boring people never, ever stop complaining about their lives, and how everything seems to be going wrong for them. Boring people never consider how things might be for other people listening, and how lucky they may actually be, especially when compared to other people who are enduring worse and yet remain upbeat, positive and engaged in life to the fullest. The popular social media trend ‘first world problems’ seems to come to mind here.

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9. They cannot tell a good story

Is there anything worse than boring people telling stories? Well, in a social setting no, because boring people have no real concept of what kind of story is fascinating and brilliant and hilarious, and what kind of story and manner of storyteling makes watching paint dry seem like a rollercoaster ride. Boring people never consider what they’re saying and how it will affect other people on an emotional level, particularly in terms of enjoyment.

10. They never express passion for anything

Boring people just never explore their own passions or desires, and so are left unfulfilled. Imagine if they’d got a chance to actually do some introspection and discover tastes, passions, and loves that they might as well possess. Boring people are stuck in the conventions of widespread, mainstream society, and never delve into what is different and unusual and unique, in order to cultivate their happiness.

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Chris Haigh

Writer, baker, co-host of "Good Evening Podcast" and "North By Nerdwest".

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Last Updated on July 20, 2021

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.

Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.

Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:

1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically

According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.

“Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor

Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:

Warming up

If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.

If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.

Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:

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  1. Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
  2. Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
  3. Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.

Stay hydrated

Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.

To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.

Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.

Meditate

Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.

Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.

Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:

2. Focus on your goal

One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.

Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’

Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.

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Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.

If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.[1]

3. Convert negativity to positivity

There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?

‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’

It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.

Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”

Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.

Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:

4. Understand your content

Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.

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However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.

“No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor

Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.

Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.[2]

One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.

5. Practice makes perfect

Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.

In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.

Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

6. Be authentic

There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.

Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.

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Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.

To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.

With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.

Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:

7. Post speech evaluation

Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.

Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation

We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.

You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.

Improve your next speech

As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:

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  • How did I do?
  • Are there any areas for improvement?
  • Did I sound or look stressed?
  • Did I stumble on my words? Why?
  • Was I saying “um” too often?
  • How was the flow of the speech?

Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.

If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:

Reference

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