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10 Signs You Are Probably An Ambivert

10 Signs You Are Probably An Ambivert

Common thought holds that there are two types of social personalities. Extroverts are the norm, and they tend to draw energy from their physical and social environment and interactions in highly social situations. Introverts have been getting more attention recently, as characterized by Susan Cain in her work Quiet: the Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking. Not surprisingly, introverts tend to draw their power from solitude and silence.

But there might be a third category of social personality: the ambivert. You may be an ambivert and not know it, but with this list of signs, you can diagnose yourself and plan accordingly.

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1. You are most comfortable in crowded spaces, but when you are in them, you don’t tend to seek out interaction.

Whether it’s at a party full of people you are somewhat familiar with, or in a coffee shop full of fellow writers knocking out their next best-sellers, ambiverts tend to want to be around but not with people. If you find yourself consistently seeking out crowded spaces so that you can blend in, you might be an ambivert.

2. You tolerate or engage in small talk, but can get very engaged in intimate conversations.

You know what the requirements of making small talk are (What’s the whether like? What happened in a generic pop culture moment?), but you often find yourself getting engrossed in deeply intimate and sometimes existential conversations. If you find yourself surviving small talk, but living for the conversations about the meaning of life, this is a sign you are an ambivert.

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3. You adjust your personality based on the energy level of the company you are in.

Because you are flexible, you find yourself shifting personalities sometimes. If you are with a high energy, highly-extroverted person, you will try to rein them in by becoming more reserved. If you are with an introverted person, you will try to dial them up.

4. You might be the life of the party – until you are 100% drained and cannot manage that energy any longer.

Ambiverts can dial up their story-telling abilities and their energy levels and hold a crowd – but only for so long. If you find yourself holding court for a while and then hitting a wall, you’re an ambivert.

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5. In spite of being the life of the party at times, you find it hard to assert yourself and your needs in intimate situations.

You think a person who can hold court at a party would be unafraid of telling others what they need in smaller settings, but in reality, it’s often hard for ambiverts to make it clear what they need in a small setting. When asked about themselves in intimate conversation, ambiverts often stumble over their words. Intimate conversations are supposed to be about the meaning of life or the significance of a new film or a societal ill, and not about something silly like yourself, right?

6. Meeting new people is fine, and being in new places is fine, but meeting new people in new places overwhelms you.

Like a childhood teddy bear, ambiverts need to hold onto something familiar. If you are intending to meet new people, you’d rather it occur in a familiar place, and if you are going to a new place, it better be with those you trust. Throwing both together is too much.

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7. You can’t decide which is a better memory – that one party or that night spent alone watching Netflix.

Ambiverts treasure both situations equally. They may spend a whole weekend partying in the same suit or dress, or they might spend a whole weekend in sweat on the couch, and they will love both situations equally.

8. You understand very quickly what drives others.

Ambiverts know both social personality types, and so they can immediately tell which person is which. They know what drives the party girlfriend and the bookworm friend, mostly because they’ve lived both situations themselves.

9. Group projects or solo ones – you always achieve the same (high) level.

Ambiverts have no preference about whether to complete tasks alone or with others, but they tend to be able to drive the project to completion regardless. Depending on the people involved or the content, they tend to enjoy both.

10. You’ve been called both an extrovert and an introvert, and didn’t know there was another option until now.

Your book club wonders how you can be so outgoing, and your party people wonder why the heck you are in a book group. Until know, you didn’t know which category you fit into, because it was neither! Congratulations, you have figured yourself out, you complicated ambivert, you!

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Last Updated on July 3, 2020

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

In today’s world, true peace must come from within us and our own actions. Here are 30 small things you can do on a regular basis to increase your overall sense of harmony, peace, and well-being:

1. Don’t go to every fight you’re invited to

Particularly when you’re around those who thrive on chaos, be willing to decline the invitation to join in on the drama.

2. Focus on your breath

Throughout the day, stop to take a few deep breaths. Keep stress at bay with techniques such as “square breathing.” Breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, then out for four counts, and hold again for four counts. Repeat this cycle four times.

3. Get organized and purge old items

A cluttered space often creates a cluttered spirit. Take the time to get rid of anything you haven’t used in a year and invest in organizational systems that help you sustain a level of neatness.

4. Stop yourself from being judgmental

Whenever you are tempted to have an opinion about someone else’s life, check your intentions. Judging others creates and promotes negative energy.

5. Say ‘thank you’ early and often

Start and end each day with an attitude of gratitude. Look for opportunities in your daily routine and interactions to express appreciation.

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6. Smile more

Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” there are many scientific benefits of smiling and laughing. Also, pay attention to your facial expression when you are doing neutral activities such as driving and walking. Turn that frown upside down!

7. Don’t worry about the future

As difficult as this sounds, there is a direct connection between staying in the present and living a more peaceful life. You cannot control the future. As the old proverb goes, “Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” Practice gently bringing your thoughts back to the present.

8. Eat real food

The closer the food is to the state from which it came from the earth, the better you will feel in eating it. Choose foods that grew from a plant over food that was made in a plant.

9. Choose being happy over being right

Too often, we sacrifice inner peace in order to make a point. It’s rarely worth it.

10. Keep technology out of the bedroom

Many studies, such as one conducted by Brigham and Women’s Hospital, have connected blue light of electronic devices before bed to adverse sleep and overall health. To make matters worse, many people report that they cannot resist checking email and social media when their cell phone is in reach of their bed, regardless of the time.

11. Make use of filtering features on social media

You may not want to “unfriend” someone completely, however you can choose whether you want to follow their posts and/or the sources of information that they share.

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12. Get comfortable with silence

When you picture someone who is the ultimate state of peace, typically they aren’t talking.

13. Listen to understand, not to respond

So often in conversations, we use our ears to give us cues about when it is our turn to say what we want to say. Practice active listening, ask questions, process, then speak.

14. Put your troubles in a bubble

Whenever you start to feel anxious, visualize the situation being wrapped in a bubble and then picture that sphere floating away.

15. Speak more slowly

Often a lack of peace manifests itself in fast or clipped speech. Take a breath, slow down, and let your thoughtful consideration drive your words.

16. Don’t procrastinate

Nothing adds stress to our lives like waiting until the last minute.

17. Buy a coloring book

Mandala coloring books for adults are becoming more popular because of their connection to creating inner peace.

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18. Prioritize yourself

You are the only person who you are guaranteed to live with 24 hours a day for the rest of your life.

19. Forgive others

Holding a grudge is hurting you exponentially more than anyone else. Let it go.

20. Check your expectations

Presumption often leads to drama. Remember the old saying, “Expectations are premeditated resentments.”

21. Engage in active play

Let your inner child come out and have some fun. Jump, dance, play, and pretend!

22. Stop criticizing yourself

The world is a hard enough place with more than enough critics. Your life is not served well by being one of them.

23. Focus your energy and attention on what you want

Thoughts, words, and actions all create energy. Energy attracts like energy. Put out what you want to get back.

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24. Assign yourself “complaint free” days.

Make a conscious decision not to complain about anything for a whole day. It might be harder than you think and the awareness will stick with you.

25. Surround yourself with people you truly enjoy being in the company of

Personalities tend to be contagious, and not everyone’s is worth catching. Be judicious in your choices.

26. Manage your money

Financial concerns rank top on the list of what causes people stress. Take the time each month to do a budget, calculate what you actually spend and sanity check that against the money you have coming in.

27. Stop trying to control everything

Not only is your inner control freak sabotaging your sense of peace, it is also likely getting in the way of external relationships as well.

28. Practice affirmations

Repeat positive phrases that depict the life and qualities you want to attract. It may not come naturally to you, but it works.

29. Get up before sunrise

Personally witnessing the dawn brings a unique sense of awe and appreciation for life.

30. Be yourself

Nothing creates more inner discord than trying to be something other than who we really are. Authenticity breeds happiness.

Featured photo credit: man watching sunrise via stokpic.com

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