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10 Habits You Need To Quit Today To Be More Sociable

10 Habits You Need To Quit Today To Be More Sociable

Bad social habits can interfere with your ability to develop relationships and engage in meaningful conversations with others. Be on the lookout for these bad habits so you can start to become more sociable today.

1. Complaining to Gain Sympathy

Complaining about how bad your life is or how unfair things are to gain other’s attention and sympathy, can backfire quickly. It might work in the short-term because people want to respond with kindness, but if it becomes a habit, you’re more likely to send people running in the other direction.

2. Focusing on Your Point of View Only

Focusing on what you’ve got to say without really hearing other points of view is a habit that will quickly annoy others. Truly listening to other points of view is at the heart of good communication.

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If you find yourself always thinking about what you’re going to say next, rather than hearing what others have to say, work on your communication skills. Become more sociable by asking follow-up questions or rephrasing what the other person has said before getting back to your point of view.

3. Listening Half-Heartedly

If you think you’re good at multi-tasking while you communicate, you might be surprised at how much you’re missing. It’s disrespectful to other people if you can’t put down your cell phone, pause the TV, or make eye contact when someone is talking with you.

Practice giving people your undivided attention whether you’re on the phone or talking to someone in person. Show that you value what they have to say and make a concerted effort to stop trying to multi-task while they’re talking.

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4. Taking the Wind out of People’s Sails

If you only point out the negative, people will quickly stop wanting to talk to you. It’s one thing to point out some potential negative aspects of a person’s choices, but it should be balanced with the positive points as well.

Whether you’ve got a friend who is dating someone new or a family member who has interviewed for a new job, avoid telling them all the reasons why they aren’t likely to be successful. If you want to be more sociable, offer support and be willing to cheer others on as they attempt to make their way through the world.

5. Attempting to Always Please Everyone

You can’t make everyone happy all the time so there’s no need to try. If you always try to do what others want, you’re actually likely to annoy people.

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Become more sociable by being willing to share your opinion in respectful ways. Avoid always answering questions with statements like, “I don’t care,” or “Whatever you want is fine.”

6. Arguing About Everything

Argumentative people quickly turn others off. Avoid constantly correcting people or debating with them. You don’t always have to agree with others and you don’t need to attempt to change their minds. Focus more on the relationship than trying to prove that you’re always right.

7. Talking About Yourself too Much

People will grow tired of hearing all about you if you don’t ever offer them a chance to talk about themselves. Ask questions about others and show a genuine interest in learning about their lives. Don’t allow yourself to keep the focus on you and everything happening in your world only.

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8. Gossiping About Everyone

If you gossip about everyone else, people will begin to avoid you. Smart people will recognize that they’re not immune to being a victim of your gossip.

Avoid spreading rumors or contributing to drama. Avoid talking about other people’s business and become more sociable by sharing ideas and experiences.

9. Bragging About Your Accomplishments

It’s okay to be proud of your accomplishments, but bragging about yourself isn’t an endearing way to attract people. Unless you’re at a job interview, there is no need to tell people how great you are.

10. Dealing with Anger Inappropriately

Whether you tend to yell and scream or simply cut people out of your life every time you feel angry, dealing with anger inappropriately can seriously limit your social life. Learn how to speak up and express yourself in an assertive manner. Asking for what you want is fine, but becoming demanding or hostile isn’t likely to win you any friendship awards.

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Amy Morin

A psychotherapist, psychology instructor, keynote speaker, and the author of the bestselling book 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do

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Last Updated on July 18, 2019

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Some people just seem to float through life with a relentless sense of happiness – through the toughest of times, they’re unfazed and aloof, stopping to smell the roses and drinking out of a glass half full.

They may not have much to be happy about, but the simplicity behind that fact itself may make them happy.

It’s all a matter of perspective, conscious effort and self-awareness. Listed below are a number of reasons why some people are always happy.

1. They Manage Their Expectations

They’re not crushed when they don’t get what they want – or misled into expecting to get the most out of every situation. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

2. They Don’t Set Unrealistic Standards

Similar to the last point, they don’t live their lives in a constant pursuit towards impossible visions of perfection, only to always find themselves falling short of what they want.

3. They Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Happiness rests with feeling fulfilled – those who fail to stop and appreciate what they have every now and again will never experience true fulfillment.

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4. They’re Not Materialistic

There are arguing viewpoints on whether or not money can really buy happiness; if it can, then we know from experience that we can never be satisfied because there will always be something newer or better that we want. Who has ever had enough money?

5. They Don’t Dwell

They don’t sweat the small things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter at the end of the day. They don’t let negative thoughts latch onto them and drain them or distract them. Life’s too short to worry.

6. They Care About Themselves First

They’re independent, care for themselves and understand that they must put their needs first in order to accommodate the needs of others.

They indulge, aim to get what they want, make time for themselves and are extremely self-reliant.

7. They Enjoy the Little Things

They stop to smell the roses. They’re accustomed to find serenity when it’s available, to welcome entertainment or a stimulating discussion with a stranger when it crosses their path. They don’t overlook the small things in life that can be just as important.

8. They Can Adapt

They’re not afraid of change and they work to make the most out of new circumstances, good or bad. They thrive under pressure, are not overwhelmed easily and always embrace a change of pace.

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9. They Experiment

They try new things, experience new flavors and never shy away from something they have yet to experience. They never order twice from the same menu.

10. They Take Their Time

They don’t unnecessarily rush through life. They work on their own schedule to the extent that they can and maneuver through life at their own relaxing pace.

11. They Employ Different Perspectives

They’re not stuck in one perspective; a loss can result in a new opportunity, hitting rock bottom can mean that there’s no where to go but up.

12. They Seek to Learn

Their constant pursuit of knowledge keeps them inspired and interested in life. They cherish information and are on a life-long quest to learn as much as they can.

13. They Always Have a Plan

They don’t find themselves drifting without purpose. When something doesn’t go as planned, they have a plan for every letter in the alphabet to fall back on.

14. They Give Respect to Get It

They are respectful and, in turn, are seen as respectable; the respect they exude earns them the respect they deserve.

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15. They Consider Every Opportunity

They always have their eyes open for a new road, a new avenue worth exploring. They know how to recognize opportune moments and pounce on them to make the most of every situation. Success is inevitable for them.

16. They Always Seek to Improve

Perpetual self-improvement is the key towards their ongoing thirst for success. Whatever it is they do, they take pride in getting better and better, from social interactions to mundane tasks. Their pursuit at being the best eventually materializes.

17. They Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

They’re not ones to get offended easily over-analyze or complicate matters. They laugh at their own faults and misfortunes.

18. They Live in the Moment

They don’t live for tomorrow or dwell on what may have happened yesterday. Every day is a new opportunity, a new chapter. They live in the now, and in doing so, get the most out of every moment.

You can learn how to do so too: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future

19. They Say Yes

Much more often than they say no. They don’t have to be badgered to go out, don’t shy away from new opportunities or anything that may seem inconvenient.

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20. They’re Self-Aware

Most important, they’re wholly aware of themselves. They self-reflect and are conscious of their states of mind. If somethings bothering them, they fix it.

We’re all susceptible to feeling down every now and again, but we are all equipped with the necessary solutions that just have to be discovered.

Lack of confidence, inability to feel fulfilled, and susceptibility to stress are all matters that can be controlled through the way we handle our lives and perceive our circumstances.

Learn about How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life.

Final Thoughts

The main philosophy employed by the happiest includes the idea that life’s simply too short: life’s too short to let things get you down, to take things for granted, to pursue absolute and unrealistic perfection.

For some, employing these characteristics is a second nature – they do it without knowing. For others, a conscious effort must be put forth every now and again. Self-Awareness is key.

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Featured photo credit: Charles Postiaux via unsplash.com

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