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How to Make a Decision: The Secret to Making the Right Decision Fast

How to Make a Decision: The Secret to Making the Right Decision Fast

When you are chasing goals to lead a more fulfilling, greater quality of life, personal growth is inevitable. Growth often means you need to change and acquire new skills as you charter new and unfamiliar territory. It can also require you to make choices and decisions you feel ill-equipped to navigate.

Some of these you might possess sound judgment to make. Others can scare the living daylights out of you. At many times, you can feel damned regardless of which pathway you choose to take.

It may seem a strange notion to grasp but you can actually make the right decision in any pivotal moment your heart is wrenched with pressure to choose the best pathway when you’re at a crossroads. When you become familiar with what your decision-making process is and develop a strong foundation from which you make each decision from, you’ll be well on track to make the right choice every time.

Here’re 5 essential principles on how to make a decision:

1. Understand the Role Emotions Play in All Your Decision-Making

Many studies have shown the role our brain plays in decision-making.[1] Our amygdala serves as an instinctual guiding light to help us learn what is good for us (i.e. keeps us safe, happy and secure) and what is not (i.e. any stimulus which poses threat to our safety and wellbeing).

We attach a different emotional value to stimuli – people, places, events and objects – depending on what we’re taught prior to experiencing them and through experiencing them ourselves. With each stimulus having a different value, we learn how to make sense of and navigate our worlds. Our amygdala plays a huge role in how we, therefore, make decisions.

Have you come across people who tell you they always make decisions purely based on facts, figures and evidence? Do they tell you they don’t let their emotions get in the way? What is most likely occurring is they feel safe when they see certain figures and enough of them.

Dubbed as the single most common concern that keeps people awake at night with worry, money is a particularly emotional subject that repeatedly requires us to consciously make the right decision. Even though you calculate your expenses can still be comfortably paid and you can afford that vacation you’ve been itching to take for the last three years, you still hesitate to book your flights.

Despite the numbers on your budget spreadsheet more than stack up in your favor, you strongly resist. Somewhere in your memory network of lessons around money and finances, there will be different levels of emotional comfort you have with all the varying aspects of earning, managing, having and not having money. As a result, you will have developed attitudes which shape your decisions as to what you do or don’t do with it. And that’s just considering your emotional attachments around money!

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When you hit a crossroads, take note of what emotions and feelings arise for you. Pay attention to these as you consider the different choices available to you.

Just because you might be experiencing fear and/or anxiety….a resistance, this does not mean you may be making the wrong decision. Your emotions are just looking out for you and warning you.

As long as you can recognize how and why your emotions – positive and negative – are serving you and you make a conscious decision about how you want to go forward, you can ensure you will be making the right decision.

2. Bring to Consciousness the Underlying Expectations You Have When Making Decisions

We might think we’re making decisions which are purely our own, but we aren’t. Peer-pressure is also not what we’re talking about here. We need to learn to identify whether or not we are making choices that subconsciously satisfy a cultural or societal norm and seeing if we can separate ourselves from this when we make our decision.

Psychological researchers Luke Chang and Alan Sanfey conducted a study showing how pre-conceived social expectations influenced the decision-making of participants who were on the receiving end of a bargaining exercise.[2] Participants were presented with offers from proposers of different splits of $10 being divided between them. The participant might be offered to receive $3 whilst the proposer kept $7. Other splits of the $10 were also offered by proposers. How participants believed proposers would make their offers, influenced whether or not they accepted or rejected offers they were given. Where participants received offers they did not expect, they rejected them.

Simply put, we hold (often subconsciously) pre-conceived expectations about how we expect potential outcomes – good and bad – to unfold.

Consider trying this exercise. Walk down the street and offer someone a $10 bill. Don’t offer any explanation as to why you are giving them the cash apart from that you simply wish to give it to them. Chances are you are going to be met with doubt, resistance and curiosity. Some people you approach might even ask you: “What’s the catch?” You might be surprised people decline taking it from you, think you’re crazy and walk away or even ignore you!

Receiving and giving money for nothing is generally unheard of. Where’s the exchange? So we hesitate. We question it.

Would you accept someone randomly giving you $10? What pre-conceived, unconscious expectations might be at play? The expectations we attach are fashioned from social experiences and lessons we’ve been exposed to that are most relevant to circumstances we find ourselves in. These expectations can work in our favor but can also work against us.

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We can be presented with difficult decisions where we have no previous reference to help us make a choice. The key is to try isolating your context for what it is and making the decision purely based on whether or not it serves you, or not.

3. Make Decisions That Satisfy Your Values, Principles and Priorities for the Long-Term

When you do this, you will always feel your decision is right. Even when consequences turn pear-shaped, you will find you’re still able to face yourself in the mirror and feel your conscience is clear.

Your choices could cause turbulence in your relationships. You might feel uneasy for some time but eventually, you will be able to sleep at night.

The choice you made honored what you believe to be right, just and ethical. You’re staying true to your inner compass.

In addition to paying attention to emotions that arise within you when you need to make a decision, ask yourself the following questions:

  • What do I believe to be true, right and ethical that needs to be honored here?
  • What unanswered question does making a choice to go this particular way, answer for me?
  • What principles, beliefs or priorities is this satisfying (or not satisfying) for me?

Many of us hit roadblocks trying to discover what our purpose is in life. We struggle to get bearings on what our career vocation is or should be. If you go back to thinking about what’s important for you to be able to repeatedly experience, receive and give of yourself, you’re pretty close to being on track to making the right decision every time.

If you’re not sure what your highest values and priorities are, look at what you spend the majority of your time:

  • Thinking about
  • Spending your money on
  • Researching and learning about
  • Making time for instead of doing other things

The more you review this, the greater clarity you’ll gain. Where and what you spend the majority of your time, energy and most of your waking hours doing is going to clearly indicate what’s important to you. Those things will be important to you because you get to feel good as a result of dedicating your energy toward them.

Beware of getting caught up in the transient recommendation of simply doing what makes you ‘feel good now’. If your bigger picture goal is to self-fund back-packing around the world for six months or to buy your first property, regularly splurging on items which reap no return on investment that you don’t even need is not going to help. It’s interesting how that pair of shoes or handbag in the display window are almost smiling at you when you’re feeling confused.

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Long-term goals can require us to make choices which bring short-term discomfort. Expect this. However, long-term goals when achieved, bring far greater gains on many more levels.

4. Never Make Decisions in an Unbalanced Physical, Emotional or Mental State

Looking to never make judgments or decisions when you are emotionally, mentally and physically depleted where you can help it, goes without saying. You lack the capacity to consider all possibilities, recognize if you have any biases and risk being emotionally skewed to only see certain parts of the equation depending on your mood state.

However, you also need to be aware of shiny, attractive opportunities which appear to be to your direct benefit, but deceptively may not.

Let’s say you’re highly motivated to develop a property portfolio. You’ve always believed developing one will financially secure you and your family’s future. You decide to attend a free property conference weekend being held in your closest capital city. The speaker line-up looks mighty impressive on the landing page. The topics they’re speaking about sound EXACTLY like what you need to know.

Attending the conference, you find the information invaluable. You ask yourself why you didn’t do this sooner! The speakers are warm, friendly and highly personable. You feel honored to receive their individual attention to answer your questions. They also have a $6,000 program to teach you certain aspects about developing your portfolio and there’s a free gift valued at $500 for only the first 15 buyers of the program. Gosh! It’s too good to miss! What do you do?

Do not touch your credit card!

There are always going to be events and opportunities like this where clever psychological tactics are heavily in play to position people to buy. You’ve been psychologically primed over a few hours at least to say yes to everything you’re being taught and are hearing. You might not believe it but you will have been emotionally softened to make the golden purchase. You feel wonderful, positive and so excited about all the possibilities.

What you don’t realize is that you could be in danger of dropping $6,000 on a lemon or a completely unsuitable program.

What’s involved that you’re not being told? What are the downfalls? What are the odds of success? You’re positioned only to focus euphorically on the glass being at least half full.

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Auctions, sales, apparently lucrative salary packages and job advertisements…all these paint a bright shiny picture of improving your circumstances. To make sure you make the right decision, wait.

Where you can, wait and wait some more. Then, ask yourself if you still feel the same. Ask yourself again: “Is this right for me?” If it is, then give yourself the green light.

The same goes for the argument you have recently had with your boss or the new person you’ve just started dating. Don’t quit your job or whimsically dump him/her at the first uncomfortable instance. Cool your jets. Let the storm settle. Orchestrate yourself a place you can recalibrate away from any influencing variables or people. Consult a mentor with no bias or personal agenda. Only when you’re back in a balanced state of mind and energy stores can you see all aspects and ensure you make the right decision.

5. Ask the Questions No One Is Asking

Seek perspectives outside your own. When all facts of the case seem beamingly positive, ask to be shown the (potential) downfalls.

Ask the questions to call-out the elephant in the room no one wants to acknowledge or address. Proactively defy the dangers of group think[3] mentality and equip yourself more thoroughly with fuller insight and confidence to capitalize on making the right decision.

The Bottom Line

There will be times where time is not on your side. Remember to stay true to your values, ethics and beliefs. Keep in sight your long-term goals and aspirations and proactively look to engage perspectives wider than your own.

When you can create pauses and find space to make your choices in a balanced emotional and mental state, you can make decisions fast.

When you decide, always remember that you chose with all the resources you had available in the actual moment you made it. When you remember this, the decision you make will always be the right one.

More About Decisions Making

Featured photo credit: Gilles Rolland-Monnet via unsplash.com

Reference

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Malachi Thompson

Executive Leadership and Performance Consultant

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Last Updated on July 13, 2020

How Not to Feel Overwhelmed at Work & Take Control of Your Day

How Not to Feel Overwhelmed at Work & Take Control of Your Day

Overwhelm is a pernicious state largely caused by the ever-increasing demands on our time and the distractions that exist all around us. It creeps up on us and can, in its extreme form, leave us feeling anxious, stressed and exhausted.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed at work, here are 6 strategies you can follow that will reduce the feeling of overwhelm; leaving you calmer, in control and a lot less stressed.

1. Write Everything down to Offload Your Mind

The first thing you can do when you begin to feel overwhelmed is to write everything down that is on your mind.

Often people just write down all the things they think they have to do. This does help, but a more effective way to reduce overwhelm is to also write down everything that’s on your mind.

For example, you may have had an argument with your colleague or a loved one. If it’s on your mind write it down. A good way to do this is to draw a line down the middle of the page and title one section “things to do” and the other “what’s on my mind”.

The act of writing all this down and getting it out of your head will begin the process of removing your feeling of overwhelm. Writing things down can really change your life.

2. Decide How Long It Will Take to Complete Your To-Dos

Once you have ‘emptied your head,’ go through your list and estimate how long it will take to complete each to-do.

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As you go through your list, you will find quite a few to-dos will only take you five or ten minutes. Others will take longer, often up to several hours.

Do not worry about that at this stage. Just focus on estimating how long you will need to complete each task to the best of your ability. Here’s How to Cultivate a More Meaningful To Do List.

3. Take Advantage of Parkinson’s Law

Now here’s a little trick I learned a long time ago. Parkinson’s Law states that work will fill the time you have available to complete it, and us humans are terrible at estimating how long something will take:((Odhable: Genesis of Parkinson’s Law))

    This is why many people are always late. They think it will only take them thirty minutes to drive across town when previous experience has taught them it usually takes forty-five minutes to do so because traffic is often bad but they stick to the belief it will only take thirty minutes. It’s more wishful thinking than good judgment.

    We can use Parkinson’s Law to our advantage. If you have estimated that to write five emails that desperately need a reply to be ninety minutes, then reduce it down to one hour. Likewise, if you have estimated it will take you three hours to prepare your upcoming presentation, reduce it down to two hours.

    Reducing the time you estimate something will take gives you two advantages. The first is you get your work done quicker, obviously. The second is you put yourself under a little time pressure and in doing so you reduce the likelihood you will be distracted or allow yourself to procrastinate.

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    When we overestimate how long something will take, subconsciously our brains know we have plenty of time and so it plays tricks on us and we end up checking reviews of the Apple Watch 4 or allow our colleagues to interrupt us with the latest office gossip.

    Applying a little time pressure prevents this from happening and we get more focused and more work done.

    4. Use the Power of Your Calendar

    Once you have your time estimates done, open up your calendar and schedule your to-dos. Go through your to-dos and schedule time on your calendar for doing those tasks. Group tasks up into similar tasks.

    For emails that need attention on your to-do list, schedule time on your calendar to deal with all your emails at once. Likewise, if you have a report to write or a presentation to prepare, add these to your calendar using your estimated time as a guide for how long each will take.

    Seeing these items on your calendar eases your mind because you know you have allocated time to get them done and you no longer feel you have no time. Grouping similar tasks together keeps you in a focused state longer and it’s amazing how much work you get done when you do this.

    5. Make Decisions

    For those things you wrote down that are on your mind but are not tasks, make a decision about what you will do with each one. These things are on your mind because you have not made a decision about them.

    If you have an issue with a colleague, a friend or a loved one, take a little time to think about what would be the best way to resolve the problem. More often than not just talking with the person involved will clear the air and resolve the problem.

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    If it is a more serious issue, then decide how best to deal with it. Talk to your boss, a colleague and get advice.

    Whatever you do, do not allow it to fester. Ignoring the problem will not make it go away. You need to make a decision to deal with it and the sooner you do so the sooner the problem will be resolved. (You can take a look at this guide on How To Make Good Decisions All The Time.)

    I remember long ago, when I was in my early twenties and had gone mad with my newly acquired credit cards. I discovered I didn’t have the money to pay my monthly bills. I worried about it for days, got stressed and really didn’t know what to do. Eventually, I told a good friend of mine of the problem. He suggested I called the credit card company to explain my problem. The next day, I plucked up the courage to call the company, explained my problem and the wonderful person the other end listened and then suggested I paid a smaller amount for a couple of months.

    This one phone call took no more than ten minutes to make, yet it solved my problem and took away a lot of the stress I was feeling at the time. I learned two very valuable lessons from that experience:

    The first, don’t go mad with newly acquired credit cards! And the second, there’s always a solution to every problem if you just talk to the right person.

    6. Take Some Form of Action

    Because overwhelm is something that creeps up on us, once we feel overwhelmed (and stressed as the two often go together), the key is to take some form of action.

    The act of writing everything down that is bothering you and causing you to feel overwhelmed is a great place to start. Being able to see what it is that is bothering you in a list form, no matter how long that list is, eases the mind. You have externalized it.

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    It also means rather than these worries floating around in a jumbled mess inside your head, they are now visible and you can make decisions easier about what to do about them. Often it could be asking a colleague for a little help, or it could be you see you need to allocate some focused time to get the work done. The important thing is you make a decision on what to do next.

    Overwhelm is not always caused by a feeling of having a lack of time or too much work, it can also be caused by avoiding a decision about what to do next.

    The Bottom Line

    Make a decision, even if it is to just talk to someone about what to do next. Making a decision about how you will resolve something on its own will reduce your feelings of overwhelm and start you down the path to a resolution one way or another.

    When you follow these strategies to can say goodbye to your overwhelm and gain much more control over your day.

    More Tips for Reducing Work Stress

    Featured photo credit: Andrei Lazarev via unsplash.com

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