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Do You Have an Unfulfilled Life? 7 Reasons Why You’re Not Satisfied

Do You Have an Unfulfilled Life? 7 Reasons Why You’re Not Satisfied

Do you wake up and hit the snooze button? Well, that’s rather normal, so don’t worry.

But if you lack the motivation to get up every morning—even after you’re all showered up and up on your feet—then it’s probably a sign. A sign that you live an unfulfilled life and that you’re not satisfied.

Most people feel confused at some point in their life, but if you feel unsatisfied and unhappy about your life on a daily basis, then it’s time to do something about it.

Maybe you feel like you’re meant for something bigger, maybe you just want to do something different with your life, or maybe you have no idea what you want, or why you feel unsatisfied.

This article will take you through 7 reasons why you might not be satisfied with your life and it will help you take a step towards a fulfilled and happy life.

1. You Don’t Realize You’re Wasting Time

It’s easy to say you’ll do something. Another thing is to actually do it. We have all tried to put off something for the next day and we’ve said: “I’ll do it tomorrow.” But if you do this often, then it could turn into a habit.

If you feel like you’re meant for something bigger, but you’re not moving forwards at all, then it’s time to take a look at your day and your time management. You might not even realize that you’re wasting your time.

Sometimes, people tell themselves it’s enough to get out of the door in the morning and sit at the office until they clock out.

Unfortunately, it’s not enough if you waste your time during the day. Some of the most common time stealers are Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. In other words, take a look at how much time you spend on social media every day. You’ll probably be able to tell if you have a problem.

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Or maybe you plan on working on your personal projects at night or during the weekend (probably both if you’re an aspiring entrepreneur), but you end up on Netflix or only have fun with your friends and family.

If you re-examine your life, you’ll find out what you do right and wrong, and how you can make a better daily and weekly plan for yourself.

It’s not about neglecting people or only being able to do one thing. It’s about understanding yourself and your habits better.

2. You’ve Lost Touch with Yourself

People do different things to feel good about themselves. For some, it means going to the gym and working out.

A study made by Ceren Doğan from the Department of Psychosocial Studies, Birkbeck College, University of London shows a connection between going to the gym and people feeling good about themselves in more than one way:[1]

“Overall, it is argued that for many participants gym exercise is more than physical training; it is also training for life. Based on a thematic analysis of 32 semi-structured interviews it is argued that gym workout is a means to create better versions of the self on mainly three levels.

First, gym participants perceive themselves to be efficient and productive in general. Second, gym training is believed to increase the control they have over their lives. Third, gym members associate their gym workout with amplified emotional resilience, believing that fitness workout makes them not only fitter in a physical sense but also fitter and better equipped in a psychological sense. “

In this case, the gym is simply an example. The point is that we all have something we do that makes us feel good and if we neglect it, then we can lose touch with ourselves and how we feel.

If you suddenly stop doing whatever you do to feel good, or it falls down on your list of priorities, then it might sneak up on you later.

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3. You Put Too Much Pressure on Yourself

While it’s good to create a plan and be ambitious, it can also backfire if you put too much pressure on yourself.

A clear goal helps you move forward in the right direction. But if you put too much pressure on yourself to achieve it, you’ll slowly feel the drive disappear day by day.

Or maybe you have taken on too much weight on your shoulder at work and at home at the same time.

If you need to focus on an important project at work, talk to your family and let them know that you need to focus on that for the next few months, but make it clear that it won’t be forever.

If it’s the other way around, then don’t take on more than you can at work. Every work situation is different, but if it’s possible for you to not take an extra shift, work late all the time, or place yourself on a difficult project, then do it, and focus on your family for a while.

4. You Don’t Finish Things

Many people have ideas. Some of them are great. Some of them are not. But it’s often not about the idea itself. If you set out to do something, but don’t finish it, then it doesn’t come without a cost.

In your mind, it might just be the idea that never goes any further. In reality, it can be about so much more than you not finishing a project.

Humans are creatures of habit. If you decide to do something and then don’t manage to finish it a couple of times—it slowly turns into a habit — a bad habit. Once you start to feel like you can’t do anything, then you’ll feel unfulfilled.

The good news is, we’re able to break habits and create new ones. Take back control and finish your projects (big or small).

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5. You Don’t Have Social Life

Human beings are social animals, we all need some sort of social life to feel happy and fulfilled.

Even if you prefer your own company in most situations, it doesn’t mean that you don’t need some sort of social life.

Maybe you’re lonely without even knowing it, but you’ve told yourself that you don’t need a partner in life because you’ve been on your own for so many years.

Or maybe you’ve never really had any good friends, so you’ve given up on meeting new people and socialising.

Either way, it’s never too late to change it. It’s true that you don’t necessary need both a partner and a good friend, but you do need someone.

No one is meant to live a completely isolated life. Put yourself out there or reach out to someone you lost touch with.

6. You Lack Purpose

It’s easy to wake up every morning and go to work. Well, maybe not completely easy, but we can all do it. The same way we can go out and smile, but on the inside we might not feel like smiling.

If you lack purpose, then it’s probably not something that will sneak up on you over night. It’s going to take some time for you to realize that this is why you’ve been feeling unfulfilled and unsatisfied.

It’s going to take some time for you to realize it because you can easily live a good life on the outside and still lack purpose. You can have a good job and a great family.

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This might make you feel bad about feeling unsatisfied, but you shouldn’t. Purpose is about you and it’s okay to want something that you maybe forgot about along the way.

You can always change direction and find it.

7. You Feel Distant

A lot of people can be present without really being present. If you’ve been feeling distant from your own life, then you get the idea. You can go to work, events and meet friends while your mind is not really there at all.

It can come from something deeper like a lack of purpose, but it might also be as simple as remembering why you do the stuff you do on a daily basis.

Peter H. Diamandis uses a self-talk technique when he feels out of funk:[2]

“It’s going back to ‘Why do I believe this is important?‘ It’s, ‘Look how far I’ve taken it so far.'”

Use this self-talk to ask yourself the same questions about your life in general. Look at your job, your habits, and your social life etc. Take a good look at your life overall and ask yourself these questions.

This might be a wake-up call or help you find what you once saw and lost sight of.

In the end, an unfulfilled life comes down to asking yourself some tough questions and react to what you find out. Find out why you’re not satisfied with and change it.

Featured photo credit: Mark Alexandrovich via unsplash.com

Reference

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Maria Jensen

Specializes in personal and professional development.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

Feeling Stuck in Life? How to Never Get Stuck Again

Feeling Stuck in Life? How to Never Get Stuck Again

The statistics are dismal. A recent study has found that 69% of people feel trapped in the same old routine, and only 3 out of 10 people are happy with their lives.[1] People are feeling stuck.

Some are feeling stuck in their careers, feeling like they’re too far along one path to make a change. Some are feeling stuck in their personal lives. The toll of the daily grind sucks most of their time and energy. So their relationships, self-care, and personal goals get lost in the shuffle of the treadmill existence.

When people come across these challenges of feeling stuck, the feeling sometimes doesn’t go away. It often intensifies as time goes on. As the stuck feeling intensifies, some people choose to settle. Subconsciously, without even realizing it, they end up pushing their dreams and goals further and further down.

Others, if the feeling of being stuck intensifies to an unbearable point, choose to make changes. They may choose to pivot in their careers, even after years at a successful job. They may end up making big changes in their relationships, or start putting their fitness at a higher priority. They may make drastic changes to finally feel free. These changes can be incredibly difficult to make, especially if a person has lived many years in a certain lifestyle.

Feeling stuck is NOT fun. I’ve been there. I get it.

Why Am I Feeling Stuck?

People feel stuck once in a while. There are many causes of feeling stuck. Many people work toward goals that don’t actually align with who they are at the core or what they truly desire. I call these “False Objectives”.

Living a life of False Objectives can cause people to feel very stuck and frustrated. People can build lives that are very “successful” according to society; but if you’ve built your life based on False Objectives, you’re not going to feel fulfilled. You’ll end up feeling stuck.

Another cause of feeling stuck is not knowing who you are. If you don’t understand how you’re innately wired – your strengths, your gifts, your talents, your passions – it’s tough to make decisions that enable you to maximize those. It’s tough to reach your full potential if you don’t know who you are.

You can feel stuck if you’re doing work that doesn’t allow you to maximize your innate strengths. If you’re doing work that doesn’t bring out the best in who you are at the core, you’ll likely feel some dissatisfaction and you won’t reach your full potential.

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Other people feel stuck because they haven’t surrounded themselves with mentors or peers who have achieved what they want to achieve. They stay in certain routines while craving to do life differently. As Jim Rohn says,

“You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.”

If your goal is to run a marathon and you’re spending most evenings and weekends drinking beer with your coworkers, you’re probably not going to run that marathon. If your goal is to live a location-independent lifestyle and work anytime from anywhere, but everyone in your social circle is at traditional jobs; it’ll be tough to break free from the 9-5 mentality.

How Feeling Stuck Screws You up Secretly

Feeling stuck screws up people’s lives. The consequences of feeling stuck can range from mild to severe. People may feel a mild discontentment with life and end up succumbing to the idea that life is “okay,” and settle. (Nancy’s story will resonate with you.) They may never reach their full potential, their highest levels of happiness and satisfaction. And they may not make the impact on the world that they could make, and have a looming sense that there could be “more” to life.

Often, though, the feeling of being stuck comes with much larger consequences. Feeling stuck can hinder career growth and contribute to disrupted marriages. It can lead to huge midlife crises.

The feeling can (and frequently does) increase as the years go on, leading to significant regrets about unfulfilled dreams. In fact, the number one regret of the dying, according to Bronnie Ware, a palliative care nurse, is, “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” She writes:[2]

“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Many people had not honored even a half of their dreams, and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.”

    Approaching Life Differently

    Thankfully, some highly effective strategies can prevent you from feeling stuck. Using these strategies can help you avoid significant problems in your life. It’s different than conventional living, and it works.

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    Commonly, people live with many set routines. While certain routines are helpful, becoming stuck in the daily grind routine can get frustrating. Many people eat roughly the same foods each week, go to the same place each day, talk to the same people, keep the same commitments, and end up living life on autopilot.

    It’s tough to feel like you’re progressing forward when each day is spent doing the same uninspiring routine. In order to avoid feeling stuck, it’s important to live intentionally. It’s crucial to live in the driver’s seat of your life and get out of autopilot mode.

    First, ditch the False Objectives. Just because everyone in your family are doctors doesn’t mean that’s the best path for you. Just because all your friends are married with a big house, a white picket fence, and 2 kids doesn’t mean that’s the best path for you. Just because everyone you know works 9-5 doesn’t mean that’s the best path for you. It’s not easy to design your life intentionally, but it’s critical in order to avoid feeling stuck.

    Remember, the majority of people feel stuck. So, if you’re doing things like the majority of people, you’ll likely feel stuck, too. You’ll need to think differently and create your life differently.

    2 Questions to Ask Yourself Every Day

    In order to intentionally design your life, avoid falling prey to False Objectives, and prevent feeling stuck, there are questions to ask yourself every day. These questions can help you stay focused on what matters most to you, help you avoid feeling stuck and frustrated, and create the best life possible.

    1. Why Am I Going to Do What I’m Going to Do Today?

    If you’re showing up to work each day and giving your years to your job, it’s important that your “why” is deeper than “to pay the bills.” Knowing why you’re doing what you’re doing can help you make choices that inspire and motivate you.

    By asking yourself why you’re going to do what you’re going to do today, you will be living intentionally. In today’s incredibly busy, easily distracted world, living intentionally and focusing every day on what matters most is unique.

    When you choose to ask yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing every day, it will help you stay focused on what’s truly important to you. This can prevent you from getting stuck.

    2. What Would Future Want Me to Do Today?

    Imagine yourself, in the future, as the best version of you. What would that version of you want you to do today? Making decisions from the viewpoint of the future you can help you move forward and prevent the stuck and frustrated feeling.

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    When you make decisions from the viewpoint of future you, you will develop perseverance and reap the benefits of delayed gratification. Today’s society is very focused on instant gratification, but a lot of great things in life take time and effort. Learning to take small steps forward by making decisions from the future you’s standpoint can help you progress toward your biggest goals and dreams.

    How to Get Unstuck

    After asking yourself the two questions, work on the plan to get unstuck. I’ve personally tried these strategies and they work for me.

    1. Choose Goals You Truly Desire to Accomplish

    This might sound obvious but we all get sucked into False Objectives at times. When you’re setting goals in your career and your personal life, make sure they are goals that matter to you.

    Working hard toward big achievements that don’t align with your values, priorities, and who you are at the core is a fast-track toward feeling stuck.

    Learn about your strengths, your gifts, and your passions. Choose goals that align with who you are at the core, and work toward goals that align with your inner strengths and gifts. This will help you maximize your potential and minimize the stuck and frustrated feelings.

    2. Watch Your Mindset

    Often, we think we’re stuck, but the problem is our mindset. Being mindful of our mindset and self-talk is important to living a life of freedom and fulfillment. Work on rephrasing your self-talk in order to improve your mindset.

    For example, if you tell yourself, “I could never start a business,” rephrase it to, “I don’t know how to start a business YET, but I can learn.” If you find yourself saying, “I don’t have enough money to travel,” tell yourself, “I don’t have the money right now, but I can make a plan to save money to travel. Rephrasing your self-talk can help you see opportunities and possibilities instead of feeling stuck.

    Occasionally, even the most driven people have days where they feel unmotivated. Check out this article for tips to get motivated when you feel like doing nothing: What Motivates You And How to Always Stay Motivated

    Those tips can help you break free from the rut.

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    3. Get out of Your Comfort Zone and Add Some Excitement to Your Day

    Shaking up your daily routine and adding some excitement to your days can help you get unstuck.

    While breaking out of your daily routine can be uncomfortable, it can be a great way to invigorate your life. You can start by getting out of your comfort zone in small ways. Here are 10 ways to step out of your comfort zone and overcome your fear. As Brian Tracy says,

    “Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.”

    Getting out of your comfort zone and experiencing growth can help you to continue to move forward and prevent you from getting stuck.

    4. Surround Yourself with People Who Have Done What You Aspire to Do

    It’s easy to get stuck if you’re trying to accomplish something and you’re struggling to believe it’s possible to accomplish it.

    Instead of letting yourself be isolated and stuck, commit to learning from people who have done what you aspire to do. This can help you believe it’s possible to achieve the same goals. It can also help you to be inspired to progress forward instead of staying in stuck-land.

    You can seek out a mentor, or even read inspiring books or listen to motivating podcasts by the people who have achieved your biggest goals and dreams.

    Final Thoughts

    It’s frustrating to feel stuck. But you don’t need to stay stuck if you know the right ways to break free from the rut.

    Practice living intentionally by asking yourself the 2 critical questions:

    • Why am I going to do what I’m going to do today?
    • What would future want me to do today?

    When you constantly reflect about what you truly want and whether you’re doing the things that lead you to what you desire, you’ll feel less stuck gradually.

    More to Help You Get Unstuck

    Featured photo credit: Krists Luhaers via unsplash.com

    Reference

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