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Last Updated on June 4, 2021

How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late

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How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late

Everyone goes through changes in their lives, whether it be aging, emotional maturing, retirement, parenthood, or entering or leaving a relationship. However, some of us seem to embrace chance better than others. When change happens, we may find ourselves wondering how to start over and make the best of the new circumstances we find ourselves in.

You’ve likely been in a situation where you felt that things just weren’t working out. Whether it’s in your personal relationships or career development, you feel stuck and unhappy with the way things are.

You need that change, yet you’re afraid to make the conscious decision to move because you’re not even sure what change you need to make, or you’re afraid you don’t have time to start over in life.

You might have been with the same company for the last 5 years, and the thought of doing the same thing for the next 5 or 10 years scares you. You want to do more, or perhaps even something completely different altogether.

Or you could already be late into adulthood, where you’ve established a good career path, and you’ve got a lot going on, such as a family to care for. You’re financially stable and could potentially be working towards your next promotion. But, somehow, you’re not quite satisfied with what you’ve achieved.

There’s just something missing. And yet it feels like it’s too late to leave all that stability behind to embark on a completely new journey of discovery.

Why is that so many of us find ourselves limiting our windows of opportunity and potential because we think it’s too late to learn how to start over?

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Meet Jack

At age 37, Jack is a Senior Manager at one of the Big Four and has been working in Audit for over 15 years. He’s got a great salary, owns his own apartment, and enjoys the finer things in life, but not without the heavy demands that his job brings.

On the surface it would look like he’s got life figured out. His next steps would be a promotion to becoming Director, or settling down with someone.

Yet, when I asked him if he was happy with his work, he hesitated before answering. He said that he sometimes wished he could quit his job to do something less stressful. However, he’s become accustomed to this lifestyle and feels that it would be too late to give it up to pursue a new career or ambition.

The external struggles that Jack faces are financial stability, social influences from his peers, the lavish lifestyle he leads, and status or recognition that he gets from continuing with this job. These may be things you’re facing as well.

Internally, Jack faces the risk of losing what he’s built over the years. It just doesn’t seem logical to give up this job for the pursuit of an alternative that would give more meaning to his life.

You might have come across a similar scenario as Jack’s, or you might be a Jack. Whether it’s the stresses and demands of your job, a lack of satisfaction, or a feeling of stagnation, you have to decide if you want to tear down that wall or continue to let it enclose you.

How to Start Over When It Feels too Late

The good news is that as our society continues to develop at such a rapid pace, it also means we have more opportunities to do things that were previously thought impossible. These days, more individuals are pushing the boundaries and breaking stereotypes.

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It’s not just about age or education. It’s about you, and your ability to accept challenges and having the determination to break free from your existing situation.

    1. Gain a Fresh Perspective

    To break free from our limitations, we’ve got to take a step back and gain a fresh perspective on just what limitations really are. On the surface, limitations are things that prevent you from doing something, but if you dig deeper, you’ll find that limitations are the things that keep you constrained inside a loop.

    They keep you stuck facing the same problems, having the same choices, and taking the same actions over and over again. Limitations define the quality of your life. If you want to improve your life, then you must break free from the limitations that keep you in the same loop every day, month, and year.

    It may seem that the limitations that you’re facing are out of your control or something that just happens to you. However, your reality is derived from your perception.

    It’s not reality that’s important, but rather how you perceive your reality. Being able to control how you look at things is the key to learning how to start over and creating a fresh start. Shaping your perception is so powerful that just a small change in perspective can completely change everything, from your motivation and outlook, to your self-esteem and confidence.

    2. Identify the Challenges

    Once you decide to shift your perspective and look at things in a new way, identify exactly what challenges you’ll face as you try to learn how to start over and reboot your life. If you want to change your job, what’s standing in your way? Is it a lack of education, a poor job market, or simply a lack of motivation?

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    If you have just ended a long-term relationship, what difficulties to you foresee in the near future? You may need to find a new living situation, reconnect with old friends, or get used to being alone again.

    To identify what’s holding you back, you can take this Life Assessment for free and get a detailed analysis of how you’re doing in different life aspects.

    Whatever the challenges are, note them down and write down at least three possible solutions. Once you see that each problem has an answer, you’ll begin to put your mind at ease and get comfortable with change.

    3. Check in With Your Values and Priorities

    If you’re determined to start over and change your life, make sure you’re pointing yourself in the right direction as you change. Identify your values and priorities and understand that they’ve likely changed over the years[1].

    When you graduated college, your priority was likely finding a job and making money. Maybe now you’re more interested in developing good relationships with your kids or traveling the world. Be honest with yourself during this process in order to make the most the change you’re going to make.

    You can learn to identify your personal values here.

    4. Utilize the Breakthrough Framework

    The Full Life Framework (as outlined in the book Full Life Essential Guide) provides an overall paradigm shift to turn any limitation into an opportunity that is achievable.

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    By going through each of these four steps, you can transform your mind and actions towards the change that is needed to achieve your ultimate goals, and truly break free from your limitations.

    Step 1: Find the Hidden Opportunity

    It’s easy to see what’s standing in your way. Instead, look for any hidden opportunities that will come out of the change as you learn how to start over.

    Step 2: Plan Your Progression

    Create a plan to achieve the change you want to make. Set a long-term goal, and then break it down into smaller short-term goals that you can work on over the next few months or years.

    Step 3: Invest and Prioritize

    Invest your time and energy into making your plan and goals a reality. Prioritize what you do with each moment and create deadlines to ensure that your plan goes smoothly.

    Step 4: Tap Into Motivation and Good Habits

    Even if you have a good plan, it won’t work unless you develop motivation and positive habits that will keep you on track. These habits can include goal setting, daily reflections, and perseverance.

    Grab your copy of The Full Life Essential Guide to learn more on tapping into your motivation to find your life’s purpose.

    Final Thoughts

    It’s possible to make life changes and learn how to start over. Don’t become a person who lets life pass them by only to regret it when you’re retired or far into old age. Don’t let your life plateau and waste away in the daily grind for the next twenty years while wasting the potential you still have.

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    Tired of being held back by your limitations? It’s time to break free from them, and start living out your best days.

    More Tips on Starting Over

    Featured photo credit: Jenna Anderson via unsplash.com

    Reference

    More by this author

    Leon Ho

    Founder & CEO of Lifehack

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    Last Updated on September 16, 2021

    How to Quit Your Unfulfilling Job and Lead Your Dream Career

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    How to Quit Your Unfulfilling Job and Lead Your Dream Career

    Doesn’t matter whether it’s a 9 to 5 job or you work in shifts; is it a satisfactory job?

    Ain’t you tired of the monotony or should I ask:

    Did you ever feel like quitting your unfulfilling job or changing your unfulfilling career?

    Realizing your materialistic needs is important but do you love your means to earn bread?

    Too many questions… I’m sure you want to answer none.

    But don’t worry, most people are on the same leaky boat!

    Wondering what’s wrong?

    As a teenager, you dream; you aspire. You are exuberant enough to chase those crazy dreams.

    But as you grow older, the zeal seems to fade away. That drop-down in intensity level sets a foundation for a compromise.

    You don’t persist with even one dream.

    What’s worse, you give different names to your choice to back out. You blame people and situations as per your convenience.

    Alas! those vivid dreams lose to your sub-conscious mind.

    But before you get disheartened, here’s an interesting fact:

    The real Col. Sanders was an entrepreneur who didn’t become a professional chef until he was 40, didn’t franchise Kentucky Fried Chicken until he was 62, and didn’t become an icon until after he sold his company at 75.[1]

    So yes, though it’s tough to quit your tiring job; it’s easier than you think.

    And when you have realized your existing job is not leading to happiness, it’s time to change!

    Desperate for super easy solutions?

    Here’s a list of 19 simple actionable steps to quit your unfulfilling job and follow your aspiring career:

    1. Step out of Your Comfort Zone

    One big reason you are compromising today is your repulsion to challenge the boundaries of your comfort zone. You don’t want to raise the bar.

    You move on subconsciously making emotional adjustments and self-harming sacrifices.

    Not anymore; it’s time to challenge it!

    The clock is ticking and you need to flow with time. That is how you welcome the new. It is one of the major steps in breaking the monotony of an unsatisfactory job.

    Not sure about stepping out of your comfort zone still? Read this article: Is It Really Better to Step Out of Your Comfort Zone?

    2. Get Rid of the Memories from Your Existing Job

    Most of the times, it is your past which doesn’t allow you to liberate yourself in the present. Your memories from the current job are dominant over your memories you want to create.

    Come on! You are stronger than you think. You need to detach yourself from those sweet-sour memories. Only then, you could take a big leap towards self-realization.

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    Here’s the deal:

    A beautiful future awaits you where every moment is so blissful you’ll not recall the past to trigger a memory.

    Learn how to let go of the past: 7 Ways To Let Go Of The Past And Live A Happy Life

    3. Listen to Your Gut

    The problem is everyone has access to the locker of your right-wrong beliefs, but not you. You listen to everyone and lose your conscious decision.

    Why don’t you back yourself?

    If you don’t love what you are doing and you want to quit your unfulfilling job, QUIT.

    Why do you restrict yourself?

    Only you have the answers to your uncertainties. Stop seeking answers from others. Ask yourself receptively. You’ll unlock all the mysteries about yourself.

    Here’s some advice for you: How to Listen to Your Inner Voice

    4. Get Excited to Fail

    Sounds silly? It’s not:

    Success is an elusive mask covering many lifeless faces of failures.

    In case you don’t know, if Thomas Edison hadn’t failed, he might not have become America’s most well-known and prolific innovator.[2] And there are even more examples like this: 10 Famous Failures to Success Stories That Will Inspire You to Carry On

    The pursuit of your dream career is full of struggles and failures. And unless you are ready to fail many times, you are ineligible to succeed.

    Only if you settle with your current job which is unsatisfying will you be a real failure. The excitement to fail on the other side is unmatched. Worth a shot!

    5. Disallow Social Environment to Control You

    If there were no cameras, every soul would tell an interesting story.[3]

    I’m sorry but your social environment is bullying you. You have become a puppet to people.

    People define your journeys and destinations, and you are losing big time.

    Wake up call!

    Cut the chord with your social environment which is not only polluting your personal but also your professional environment: Managing Your Social Network Addiction

    6. Do Not over Analyze, Execute

    Intelligent people are particularly prone to the overthinking that can cause analysis paralysis and lead to a failure to make decisions or take action.[4]

    Yes, you are intelligent but you need to be smarter! Never allow your intelligence to become a hindrance in quitting your unfulfilling job.

    Thinking and planning are important aspects of a visionary, but never allow overthinking to take a toll on the execution.

    Take small steps rather than thinking about giant leaps. Divide your goal into small targets; make sure you achieve them.

    Here’s how: Less Thinking, More Doing: Develop the Action Habit Today

    7. Make Your Family a Part of Your Dream

    If you are fortunate enough to live with your family, you owe responsibilities towards them. After all, they are your father, mother, siblings, life-partner.

    Maybe your dream career is something they haven’t heard about, but relax. Don’t expect magic overnight!

    Be courageous enough to make them understand why you want to quit your unsatisfactory job.

    You may fail big time but don’t lose hope. This is the absolute test of your endurance.

    When you convince them, you don’t have to search for a support system in your failures. And a few applauds from them in your small wins keep you up and running.

    8. Spend Time with Like-Minded People

    To challenge the now and dive into the new, I’m afraid you’ll not find many people standing by your side.

    But that’s fine!

    Keep a close watch on people with whom you spend your precious time.

    What you need to ask yourself:

    Are these people your motivators or the ones who constantly try to put you down?

    When you get an answer, trust it and go with the flow. You may lose people but you’ll discover yourself.

    9. Prioritize Inner Happiness over Monetary Happiness

    Possibly, there’s a big fat cheque between your unsatisfactory job and your aspiration. The choice is difficult!

    You’ll agree money is not everything but the first thing to be happy. But if your job is not reviving and is killing your happiness, what are you waiting for?

    Maybe your dream career isn’t as materialistically rich as your current job, but assuredly, it’ll make you spiritually content.

    You have found out what will make you happy, so just go out there and get it: How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up

    10. Learn to Say No

    ‘No’ is just a two-letter word, ever measured its intensity?

    It is loud enough to make you a warrior. However, we don’t use it often.

    Being on the receiving end of a no can be brutal, but saying yes to everything isn’t going to make up for that.[5]

    Learn this art to quit your unfulfilling job! Not only with others but use it often with yourself. Any denial or a small sacrifice for your own good is a gateway to self-love. It boosts your self-esteem to disallow the negative influences to entice you. You find reasons to listen to yourself.

    Leo Babauta has some suggestions on this: The Gentle Art of Saying No

    11. Accompany Yourself in Your Alone Time

    You encounter many moments in your daily life when there is no one around. What do you do in that alone time?

    Either you retreat to the past or you drive to the future. What you don’t realize is your present requires an introspection.

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    This ignorance is making you incomplete. Neither you are self-aware nor there is a clarity in your thought process.

    The secret is when you spend alone time with yourself, your dream becomes your mission, and the inroads make way for beautiful roads. Your journey doesn’t need a navigator. And your questions have answers.

    Use your alone time to do some self reflection: How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life

    12. Feel Fortunate for the Blessing

    When most of us are fighting for the necessities of survival; you discovered your dream.

    Where most of the people don’t get solitude time, you know what makes you blissful.

    Yes… you are fortunate! How could you dump this wonderful opportunity?

    There are many people who might replace you in your unfulfilling job. But make sure no one replaces you in the work you do the best.

    13. Never Lie to Yourself

    Confidence is imperative but if there is no transparency in your thought process, only confidence is a big disaster.

    Self-acceptance is supreme in pursuance of your dream career.

    You need to acknowledge your current standing and future goals.

    You need to be brutally honest to yourself. Only then, there’s a clarity in your thought process.

    Don’t blindly run towards your dream’s realization; walk on your aspiration-driven path consciously.

    14. Become an Inspiration for Others

    Amidst your uncertainties, someone is closely watching your actions and reactions.

    Maybe your close friend or your younger sibling, there’s someone relating to you. They are curious about your next move.

    But what do they seek from you? They silently urge you to take one brave move to open the floodgate.

    Only you can break the shackles of their boring monotony. Because when you execute, they feel happy and liberated like you.

    You become their unsung hero!

    15. Realize Your Current Job Is Saturating You

    Your current job is unsatisfactory. It cannot get worse. It is tiring and boring, it doesn’t release serotonin anymore.

    And you know it!

    You even know your exploration begins only when you quit your current job. What else can motivate?

    Always remember:

    You may do well in your existing job but you will create wonders on the other side. Go all in!

    16. Segregate Your Dream into a Passionate Movement

    You have a dream career in mind. But to follow it, you are not resilient to do what it takes to reach there.

    You lose hope quickly!

    Look:

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    Neither dreaming is enough nor quitting your existing job is easy.

    Only your passionate will is powerful enough to withstand the test of time. Let that fire burn inside you until your dream coincides with reality.

    17. Pen down the Possible Positives

    It’s super easy! But you are probably wondering:

    How could such a small step be beneficial in quitting my unsatisfactory job?

    Yes, it’s a small step but immensely powerful.

    When you list down how quitting your unfulfilling job is a boon, trusting your decision becomes easier.

    Any apprehensions at any point flush out when you recall those jotted positives of leading a dream career.

    18. Break the Rules

    There is no thumb rule or a particular mantra for success. It’s good to have idols. There’s no harm in following them. But what’s wrong is you compare your journey with them.

    What you don’t realize is that you may share the same goal but the approach has to be different.

    Never kill your originality trying to become like them.

    Define your own journey. Never set a rule or a predefined path for success. Break-free!

    19. Presume the Worst-Case Situation

    Try to question yourself:

    What will happen if you quit your unfulfilling job to lead to your dream career?

    Is it your financial stability or an emotional dependency you are losing on? Whatever it is, imagining the worst-case scenario enables you to loosen up.

    It provokes a nothing-to-lose attitude where there is no fear of anyone and anything. You move forward wholeheartedly with authority and devotion.

    Your self-motivation is at cloud nine; you don’t fear the consequences anymore.

    I hope any of these actionable techniques revive the feel you were about to lose.

    Final Thoughts

    You are a blessed soul who knows a couple of things more than most of the people:

    Your current job is unfulfilling, and that you have a career-oriented dream.

    But knowing about these isn’t enough!

    Set yourself free as an individual and dive into the competition where your only competitor is you.

    Life is too short to regret! Now when you have tasted the feeling of your chips being down, you deserve the magical feel to be on the other side of the table.

    Always remember:

    You are wrong only till the time you are struggling. But if you keep moving and taking those hard punches, one day you’ll realize your dream. With you, people realize everything about you were (and are) right!

    More Useful Career Advice

    Featured photo credit: Leonardo Yip via unsplash.com

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    Reference

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