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When You Take Full Responsibility Of Your Life, You’ll Find Success

When You Take Full Responsibility Of Your Life, You’ll Find Success

Have you ever fallen into a trap of blaming other people, circumstances, or even destiny, for the things that are not working out the way you planned? Don’t worry we all have. It’s easier to blame someone or something else than it is to take responsibility and actually work on improving ourselves. The work towards self-improvement isn’t easy, it requires a lot of time and dedication. It gets easier once we become aware of our own responsibility, and we do something about it. In order to truly become mindful and accountable, we first need do away with unhealthy beliefs.

Your thoughts are standing in the way of your success

It may seem a bit harsh, but it’s the way it is. If you think about it, you’ll probably find some evidence of this in your daily life. You may have a colleague at work that you don’t particularly like, for example. Your thoughts about this person are negative, and each time you see him or her, you repeat that thought process. As a result, each time you interact with this person, the outcome is always a negative one. It seems to confirm your beliefs about him. In fact, it is your thoughts presenting this person in a negative light.  By projecting negative feelings onto someone, you are expecting the worst, and usually, you get what you expect. If you’d observe this person interacting with someone else, you might be surprised at how different the outcome is. Changing our perspective changes the circumstances by which we know people. This may take some time to practice, but once you see the initial results, you will be eager to observe your thoughts and look for positive ones.

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Life doesn’t owe you anything

We have all been there – Our goals set and our hopes high, yet reality just doesn’t materialize it for us. Then we get frustrated at life because it was supposed to yield to us that career, money, car, house, or soul mate. Actually, it doesn’t work that way. The sooner we realize it, the sooner we get over the initial frustration and start really being proactive. Positive thinking and picturing a good outcome is the first step, but it will only get us so far. In order to actually achieve anything, some action is required. Dreaming big and thinking about our goals being achieved can, in fact, be counterproductive if not done properly.

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An NYU study has shown that people who had been imagining their biggest goals being achieved were having a lot less success when it came to actually working on those goals. During wishful thinking we imagine ourselves achieving goals we think are unattainable. When faced with doing the actions, we give up easily because we actually don’t believe it is possible. In order to master our goals, we have to successfully combine positive thinking and action. When imagining success, set smaller goals that are attainable then take action. The action part is the most difficult, especially if we’ve been passive for too long. If we become aware of the obstacles, our motivation increases, and we are more likely to take some action. Starting small will increase our sense of achievement and build our momentum making it easier to tackle bigger and bigger challenges. You won’t always win, and you won’t always get what you want, but if you keep the positive attitude and don’t give up, you will get where you wanted to be.

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Realizing that life doesn’t owe us anything and that it is our responsibility to make our dreams come true can at first make us frustrated, but soon we will discover that it was actually the point all along. There is no better reward than knowing you have achieved something without anyone’s help.

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Ana Erkic

Social Media Consultant, Online Marketing Strategist, Copywriter, CEO and Co-Founder of Growato

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Last Updated on December 13, 2019

7 Steps For Making a New Year’s Resolution and Keeping It

7 Steps For Making a New Year’s Resolution and Keeping It

Are you keen to reinvent yourself this year? Or at least use the new year as a long overdue excuse to get rid of bad habits or pick up new ones?

Yes, it’s that time of year again. The time of year when we feel as if we have to turn over a new leaf. The time when we misguidedly imagine that the arrival of a new year will magically provide the catalyst, motivation and persistence we need to reinvent ourselves.

Traditionally, New Year’s Day is styled as the ideal time to kick start a new phase in your life and the time when you must make your all important new year’s resolution. Unfortunately, the beginning of the year is also one of the worst times to make a major change in your habits because it’s often a relatively stressful time, right in the middle of the party and vacation season.

Don’t set yourself up for failure this year by vowing to make huge changes that will be hard to keep. Instead follow these seven steps for successfully making a new year’s resolution you can stick to for good.

1. Just Pick One Thing

If you want to change your life or your lifestyle don’t try to change the whole thing at once. It won’t work. Instead pick one area of your life to change to begin with.

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Make it something concrete so you know exactly what change you’re planning to make. If you’re successful with the first change you can go ahead and make another change after a month or so. By making small changes one after the other, you still have the chance to be a whole new you at the end of the year and it’s a much more realistic way of doing it.

Don’t pick a New Year’s resolution that’s bound to fail either, like running a marathon if you’re 40lbs overweight and get out of breath walking upstairs. If that’s the case resolve to walk every day. When you’ve got that habit down pat you can graduate to running in short bursts, constant running by March or April and a marathon at the end of the year. What’s the one habit you most want to change?

2. Plan Ahead

To ensure success you need to research the change you’re making and plan ahead so you have the resources available when you need them. Here are a few things you should do to prepare and get all the systems in place ready to make your change.

Read up on it – Go to the library and get books on the subject. Whether it’s quitting smoking, taking up running or yoga or becoming vegan there are books to help you prepare for it. Or use the Internet. If you do enough research you should even be looking forward to making the change.

Plan for success – Get everything ready so things will run smoothly. If you’re taking up running make sure you have the trainers, clothes, hat, glasses, ipod loaded with energetic sounds at the ready. Then there can be no excuses.

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3. Anticipate Problems

There will be problems so make a list of what they’ll be. If you think about it, you’ll be able to anticipate problems at certain times of the day, with specific people or in special situations. Once you’ve identified the times that will probably be hard work out ways to cope with them when they inevitably crop up.

4. Pick a Start Date

You don’t have to make these changes on New Year’s Day. That’s the conventional wisdom, but if you truly want to make changes then pick a day when you know you’ll be well-rested, enthusiastic and surrounded by positive people. I’ll be waiting until my kids go back to school in February.

Sometimes picking a date doesn’t work. It’s better to wait until your whole mind and body are fully ready to take on the challenge. You’ll know when it is when the time comes.

5. Go for It

On the big day go for it 100%. Make a commitment and write it down on a card. You just need one short phrase you can carry in your wallet. Or keep it in your car, by your bed and on your bathroom mirror too for an extra dose of positive reinforcement.

Your commitment card will say something like:

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  • I enjoy a clean, smoke-free life.
  • I stay calm and in control even under times of stress.
  • I’m committed to learning how to run my own business.
  • I meditate daily.

6. Accept Failure

If you do fail and sneak a cigarette, miss a walk or shout at the kids one morning don’t hate yourself for it. Make a note of the triggers that caused this set back and vow to learn a lesson from them.

If you know that alcohol makes you crave cigarettes and oversleep the next day cut back on it. If you know the morning rush before school makes you shout then get up earlier or prepare things the night before to make it easier on you.

Perseverance is the key to success. Try again, keep trying and you will succeed.

7. Plan Rewards

Small rewards are great encouragement to keep you going during the hardest first days. After that you can probably reward yourself once a week with a magazine, a long-distance call to a supportive friend, a siesta, a trip to the movies or whatever makes you tick.

Later you can change the rewards to monthly and then at the end of the year you can pick an anniversary reward. Something that you’ll look forward to. You deserve it and you’ll have earned it.

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Whatever your plans and goals are for this year, I’d do wish you luck with them but remember, it’s your life and you make your own luck.

Decide what you want to do this year, plan how to get it and go for it. I’ll definitely be cheering you on.

Are you planning to make a New Year’s resolution? What is it and is it something you’ve tried to do before or something new? Why not pick one from this list: 50 New Year’s Resolution Ideas And How To Achieve Each Of Them

Featured photo credit: Ian Schneider via unsplash.com

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