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If Your Mind Is Always Filled With This Thought, You’ll Be More Successful

If Your Mind Is Always Filled With This Thought, You’ll Be More Successful

Can you think about the last time you felt really nervous about something important to you? Maybe you needed to speak publicly in front of a room full of people, run a big meeting at the office, or interview for a job with other applicants you feel are much more qualified than you. Whatever it may be, there are countless situations throughout life that will make you feel as small as an ant.

It’s normal to feel inferior from time to time. It’s a struggle that many face. However, there are many people around you who encourage you to stay strong, focused, and positive, and to stand firmly behind what you believe in. If you can hold on to those things, you’re more likely to be successful.

Superiority could be your downfall

    Image credit: happyplacetoons

    It’s true, for the most part, that we’ve all been conditioned to believe that having feelings of inferiority is bad, but I think just the opposite. Many of us have a strong sense of superiority, and that can cause many problems. The root of the problem begins with someone thinking, “I’m superior to others.” It endorses a defective model of being that’s “self as an object.”

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    The thing is, only objects can be assessed and compared. That is essentially what the mind is doing when it comes up with the notions of superiority and inferiority – it forms fixed ideas about “I am a certain way,” and about how others are. A human cannot be compared; it’s one of those “does not apply” operations, just like dividing by zero.

    Continued feelings of superiority can become roadblocks when it comes to furthering progress and reaching a higher level of success. It’s like walking through life with blinders on, unable to see what is going on around you. Having this mindset can really stand in the way of self-improvement.

    Inferiority can be a tool for growth

    I get it though; feeling inferior just turns a day into another painful experience. We feel inferior when we engage in comparison. It comes from an ego-based perspective where we find ourselves or others lacking in some way. Quite honestly, this doesn’t benefit anyone involved. You can lose motivation and the desire to become more successful. It can even cause you to become unnecessarily hostile.

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    One must realize that it isn’t so much the comparison that is unhelpful, but rather how you approach it. The act of comparing isn’t the problem, it’s the meaning you attach to what you find when comparing.

    When you feel that envy is on the horizon, you know how uncomfortable you’re going to feel. Here is where you have to make a decision: You can either beat yourself up over the space between where you are currently and where they are, or you can ask yourself, “What can I learn from this person to get myself closer to where I want to be?” These options are based on ego gratification and validation, the other is based on self-compassion with the strong desire to live the best life you can. Of course, making a decision like this isn’t easy to do when you’re in the moment, but it is very possible.

    When you feel inferior and “not enough,” try and look at it as a chance for growth. If you’re comparing yourself to someone you aspire to be like, take the opportunity to reach out and ask them for advice and/or tips on how they’ve reached their level of success.

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    Embrace the rocky road you travel

    It’s hard for anyone to see the positives when it comes to feeling inferior, but they are there. It isn’t abnormal to feel envious of those who are more successful than you. It happens, and it’s okay to feel that way.

    What isn’t okay is to let yourself fall into a rut that is really hard to get out of. Today, people want all the benefits that come with success without having to do the hard work that comes along with it. A lot of people feel they deserve things handed to them on a silver platter. That’s where the superiority comes into play. It can make one very ignorant.

    You can be confident while still remaining unsure of yourself. You can feel satisfied with your level of success and still have the desire to reach higher ground. You can feel both superior and inferior when you have a healthy combination. It’s important to feel that you are doing a great job, but are still aspiring to be more to reach your fullest potential.

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    The choice is yours.

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    Erica Wagner

    Freelance Writer

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    Last Updated on October 15, 2018

    How to Calm Down When You Are Overwhelmed: 7 Quick Ways to Try

    How to Calm Down When You Are Overwhelmed: 7 Quick Ways to Try

    Do you sometimes feel that you add items to your to-do list faster than you tick them off? Do you spend most of your day worrying about your lack of time?

    The truth is, no matter how much we love our job, or how productive we believe we are under stress, there comes a moment when the pressure rises above boiling point. The sheer number of urgent tasks multiplies in a geometric progression. New possibilities no longer sound inspiring, they sound overwhelming and equal more work.

    If that’s where you are right now – keep reading! If not, it doesn’t mean you should wait until you get there to learn how to cope with a demanding work schedule and how to calm yourself down quickly when you feel overwhelmed.

    Here are 7 quick and easy tips on how to calm down when you are overwhelmed:

    1. Let go of a few activities

    Yes, it’s that easy! Take a look at your to-do list and ask yourself, “If I don’t do it today, will it matter a month from now?”

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    Not every urgent task is important. Just like not every important, high pay-off task is urgent. The best way to keep yourself from getting overwhelmed and to manage your time is to know the difference between the two and learn to simplify your life by getting your to-do list down to three big tasks.

    2. Take deep breaths to calm down

    This advice sounds so simple it’s often overlooked. But it works better (and faster) than any other relaxation technique out there.

    There is a direct connection between our emotional state and breathing. An anxious, frustrated or overwhelmed person breathes as if they have just finished running a marathon. A calm person breathes differently. Their breathing is deep, slow and steady. So when you have a panic attack, the best way to bring your heart rate down and to regain your cool is to change your breathing.

    Try this now:

    Take a slow, long deep breath in, filling your lungs with air and expanding your diaphragm. Hold your breath for four counts and then slowly release the air through your mouth. Repeat four times and notice frustration and the feeling of being overwhelmed dissolve with each long exhale of these calming breaths.

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    3. Make “Just one thing” your mantra

    When we feel overwhelmed by the amount of tasks on our to-do list, it’s easy to enter the ‘deer in the headlights’ state. You see deadlines approaching directly towards you, and you know that something has to be done about them, but you just don’t know where to start.

    The best way to get your mind out of an ‘inactivity trance’ is to create momentum. This is what makes the “Just one thing” mantra so powerful. It helps to change our expectation that everything has to be completed right now, “or else.”

    Next time you feel overwhelmed make grabbing a cup of coffee your “Just one thing.” You can do it, right? Then come back, pick one of the smallest tasks on your to-do list and tell yourself you’ll do just that one task. This is your next “Just one thing” that you will concentrate on until it’s complete. After that you can move on to the next task and so on.

    It’s not “One thing at a time.” Saying this implies that there is a huge line of other tasks waiting to get done and that’s not the message you want to keep repeating to yourself. Learn how to focus here and stop getting overwhelmed.

    4. Reduce the multi-tasking and multi-thinking

    It’s been proven that multi-tasking is very inefficient, to the point of dumbing us down (more than smoking marijuana does). The same is true for multi-thinking, when your mind frantically jumps from one thought to another, trying to focus on and analyze several things all at once.

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    Fortunately, there is help. A few minutes of meditation or brainwave music is all it takes to start feeling more relaxed, more creative and less overwhelmed.

    5. Get moving

    Any exercise you engage in – be it walking or dancing to your favorite beat – helps to release endorphins, the ‘feel-good’ hormones, through your body and to clear your mind.

    Staying active also increases your productivity, enhances your ability to combat stress and anxiety. It also helps you to release the tension, boosting your mood and changing the thoughts that induce the sense of being overwhelmed.

    The best part is you don’t have to spend hours in the gym to get the mind-soothing benefits of exercise. Even as little as 15 minutes of dancing or jogging can go a long way towards making you feel better and staying calmer.

    6. Change your surroundings

    We all need and deserve to take vacations from work woes and family responsibilities. Unfortunately, spending two weeks lazing on a beach, toes in the sand and a Mojito in hand, is not always an option. However, this doesn’t mean that we can’t take short ‘vacations’ from work stress and the technology buzz.

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    Go outside for a few minutes and enjoy the sunshine. Stop at a park instead of driving straight home from work. Sometimes changing your surroundings and ‘spicing up your routine’ is all it takes to change your perspective on things and find creative solutions to seemingly complex and overwhelming problems.

    7. Get some pet therapy

    Studies have shown what most of us already guessed – our pets can be a great help during stressful moments. Simple actions such as petting or playing with your dog or cat can lower high blood pressure, boost your immune system and boost your mood.

    Besides, pets can make the best conversation partners to share your frustrations with. They listen, they love you unconditionally and they never talk back or say, “I told you so.”

    Final thoughts

    Don’t wait for stress to hit you to start practicing these quick ways to calm down when you are overwhelmed. The best way to enjoy a worry-free life is not to push yourself to the limit of being overwhelmed and frustrated.

    Featured photo credit: Dardan via unsplash.com

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