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If Your Mind Is Always Filled With This Thought, You’ll Be More Successful

If Your Mind Is Always Filled With This Thought, You’ll Be More Successful

Can you think about the last time you felt really nervous about something important to you? Maybe you needed to speak publicly in front of a room full of people, run a big meeting at the office, or interview for a job with other applicants you feel are much more qualified than you. Whatever it may be, there are countless situations throughout life that will make you feel as small as an ant.

It’s normal to feel inferior from time to time. It’s a struggle that many face. However, there are many people around you who encourage you to stay strong, focused, and positive, and to stand firmly behind what you believe in. If you can hold on to those things, you’re more likely to be successful.

Superiority could be your downfall

    Image credit: happyplacetoons

    It’s true, for the most part, that we’ve all been conditioned to believe that having feelings of inferiority is bad, but I think just the opposite. Many of us have a strong sense of superiority, and that can cause many problems. The root of the problem begins with someone thinking, “I’m superior to others.” It endorses a defective model of being that’s “self as an object.”

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    The thing is, only objects can be assessed and compared. That is essentially what the mind is doing when it comes up with the notions of superiority and inferiority – it forms fixed ideas about “I am a certain way,” and about how others are. A human cannot be compared; it’s one of those “does not apply” operations, just like dividing by zero.

    Continued feelings of superiority can become roadblocks when it comes to furthering progress and reaching a higher level of success. It’s like walking through life with blinders on, unable to see what is going on around you. Having this mindset can really stand in the way of self-improvement.

    Inferiority can be a tool for growth

    I get it though; feeling inferior just turns a day into another painful experience. We feel inferior when we engage in comparison. It comes from an ego-based perspective where we find ourselves or others lacking in some way. Quite honestly, this doesn’t benefit anyone involved. You can lose motivation and the desire to become more successful. It can even cause you to become unnecessarily hostile.

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    One must realize that it isn’t so much the comparison that is unhelpful, but rather how you approach it. The act of comparing isn’t the problem, it’s the meaning you attach to what you find when comparing.

    When you feel that envy is on the horizon, you know how uncomfortable you’re going to feel. Here is where you have to make a decision: You can either beat yourself up over the space between where you are currently and where they are, or you can ask yourself, “What can I learn from this person to get myself closer to where I want to be?” These options are based on ego gratification and validation, the other is based on self-compassion with the strong desire to live the best life you can. Of course, making a decision like this isn’t easy to do when you’re in the moment, but it is very possible.

    When you feel inferior and “not enough,” try and look at it as a chance for growth. If you’re comparing yourself to someone you aspire to be like, take the opportunity to reach out and ask them for advice and/or tips on how they’ve reached their level of success.

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    Embrace the rocky road you travel

    It’s hard for anyone to see the positives when it comes to feeling inferior, but they are there. It isn’t abnormal to feel envious of those who are more successful than you. It happens, and it’s okay to feel that way.

    What isn’t okay is to let yourself fall into a rut that is really hard to get out of. Today, people want all the benefits that come with success without having to do the hard work that comes along with it. A lot of people feel they deserve things handed to them on a silver platter. That’s where the superiority comes into play. It can make one very ignorant.

    You can be confident while still remaining unsure of yourself. You can feel satisfied with your level of success and still have the desire to reach higher ground. You can feel both superior and inferior when you have a healthy combination. It’s important to feel that you are doing a great job, but are still aspiring to be more to reach your fullest potential.

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    The choice is yours.

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    Erica Wagner

    Freelance Writer

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    Last Updated on December 17, 2018

    Read this and stop feeling overwhelmed…for good!

    Read this and stop feeling overwhelmed…for good!

    We live in a time of productivity overload.

    Everywhere you turn are articles and books about how to be more productive, how to squeeze 27 hours of work out of every 24, how to double your work pace, how to do more and more all in the name of someday getting out of the rat race. Well this is about the side effects of those ideas. If we aren’t multitasking, we feel lazy. If we aren’t doing everything, we feel like we’re slacking. We compare ourselves to others who we think are doing more, having more, getting more and achieving more, and it’s driving us crazy. We feel overwhelmed when we think we have too much to do, too much is expected of us, or that a stressor is too much for us to handle. And we respond by lashing out with emotions of anger, irritability, anxiety, doubt and helplessness.

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    This season especially is the most stressful time of year. Between the holidays, final exams, family gatherings and general feelings of guilt that it’s the end of the year, it’s easy to get overwhelmed thinking of all the things you still need to get done. But if you use these tips, not only will you get the important stuff done, you’ll keep your sanity while doing it!

      Is this you?

      Change your thought pattern-stop thinking negatively

      When you feel overwhelmed, the first thing you do is start thinking negatively or begin to resent why it’s your responsibility in the first place! The first thing you have to do is to stop! Stop thinking negatively immediately. Instead, focus on the positive. If you’re stuck in traffic, think of how great it is to have some time to yourself. If you’re rushing trying to get things done by a deadline, think how lucky you are to have a purpose and to be working towards it. If you’re stressing about a final exam, think of how fortunate you are to be given the opportunity of higher education. After you’ve changed your thought patterns, you must then say to yourself “I can do this.” Keep saying it until you believe it and you’re more than halfway to ending feeling overwhelmed.

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      Take a deep breath/change your body posture

      When you’re stressed certain things happen to your body. You start to breath shallowly, you hunch over, you immediately tense up and all that tension drives your feelings of stress even more. Relax! Straighten your posture and take at least ten deep, cleansing, breaths. Force yourself to smile and do something to change your state. It could be as simple as giving yourself a hug or as silly as clapping your hands three times, throwing them up in the air and shouting “I GOT THIS!” Think to yourself, how would I sit/stand if I had perfect confidence and control of the situation?

      Focus on right now

      Now that you are in a better state of mind and are no longer thinking negatively, you need to focus on the here and now. Ask yourself this question: What is the most important thing I have control of and can act on right now? Keep asking yourself this until you have a concrete next step.

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      Take Action

      Now that you know what’s most important and what to do about it, do it! Start with the first step and focus on getting that done. Don’t worry about anything else right now, just on what your first step is and how to get it done. Once that’s done with, determine the next most important step and get that done.

      Let go of what you can’t control (the gambler’s theory)

      Seasoned gamblers understand the importance of due diligence and knowing when to let go. The Gambler’s Theory is that once your bet is placed there is nothing you can do, so you might as well relax and enjoy the process. The time to worry is when you’re figuring out the best odds and making the decision of what to bet when you can actually take action. I used this one a lot in college. After an exam, there is absolutely no point in stressing about it. There’s nothing you can do. And the same goes for feeling overwhelmed. If you can do something about your situation, do it, focus and take action. But if you’ve done what you could and now are just waiting, or if you’re worried about something you have no control over, realize that there’s no point. You might as well relax and enjoy the moment.

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      yoga-422196_1280
        Relax and enjoy the moment

        Stop feeling guilty

        Finally, stop comparing yourself to others. If you are at your wits end trying to keep up with what you think you should be doing, you aren’t being fair to yourself. This isn’t to say that you shouldn’t strive for improvement, just don’t go overboard because you feel like you have to. Only you know what’s really important to you, and your personal success journey so focus on what your top priorities are, not someone else’s.

        Everyone feels overwhelmed sometimes. The important thing is to realize it’s normal and that you can do something about it by taking focused and deliberate action. Happy Holidays!

        Featured photo credit: Stress Therapy via flickr.com

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