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Key Questions: Why Not Me? The Healthy Alternative

Key Questions: Why Not Me? The Healthy Alternative

Why me? We all ask ourselves this question at some point. Life is like a beautiful but blemished creature, not perfect, but still you don’t want to look away. We human kind seemingly only see the blemishes at times.

When the trying and misunderstood troubles swell like the menacing clouds of great storms we seldom recognize the life, the growth that comes after the storm subsides. Instead we shake our heads and ask ourselves why me? The questions that we ask ourselves determine how we will perform during our various tests. So the next time you wonder “why” instead wonder “why not me?”.

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Overcoming selfishness has Lasting Rewards.

When we wonder why the fates, or the universe, or karma, or God or whoever else could possibly allow misfortune into our paths has chosen us, we show how crippled we are with entitlement. In America especially we as a people have glaring entitlement issues. This “why me” type of question sheds light on that truth even when we alone in ourselves know it. What makes us so much better than anyone else that we believe bad things should not happen to us?

Instead of adopting selfishness in our life’s philosophy we can change our key questions that we ask ourselves simply by asking “why not me?” My son was diagnosed with autism and when I asked myself that question “why not me?”, I began to deal with the disorder properly. I started seeing autism as a formidable foe that another family may not been able to handle. A formidable foe but not a stumbling block.

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Why not me? Why can’t I conquer this challenge? Why can’t my son achieve greatness? Why can’t I learn to see autism as a blessing? Why isn’t autism a gift? Remove selfishness from every equation and suddenly our negatives become our positives.

The Question “Why Me” Makes Us Consider Our Lives In The Worst Way.

Misfortune visits everyone. Difficulties in life do not respect your person or bank account or heritage they just come to everyone. At one time or another, you will face aspects of life that you do not want to face.

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The sooner we realize that we will inevitably be confronted with pain, loss, and discouraging, sometimes unbelievable circumstances of all shapes and sizes the better. The key questions we choose in our lives, will either help us to deal with that sobering idea much better or lead us into a self deprecating world view.
When we ask “Why me?” We have to answer the question. Whether consciously or true or unconsciously and false, we will start to find our own faults that we plug into our “reasons” for why generally negatively viewed occurrences have occurred in our lives.

For example, that parents whose children suffer from varying disorders often believe their child have these disorders because of their own life decisions but that is often times not the case.

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We must guard ourselves from falling victim to the blame and guilt-ridden game. No one is perfect, but that doesn’t mean that those faults in turn evolve into the negatives our lives face in the future. When we ask “Why me?” the answers eventually become “…because of me.”

The Wisdom of Solomon

Let us be reminded of what wise Solomon taught. “But time and chance happeneth to them all.” Solomons lesson remains true not just with parents but with everyone else as well. Time and chance make the decisions not our superstitious doubts, or our fears, or our failures.

When we let go of our selfishness by asking ourselves key questions like “Why not me?”, we embark down the path of solutions. Once we realize that bad happens to every single person without rhyme or reason, then avoiding self-deprication and selfish question like “Why me?”, makes sense. If we reject that notion, then the path of selfishness and problems grooves deeper.

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Last Updated on November 5, 2018

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

We’ve all got our enemies; people who take pleasure in causing us pain and misery. Sometimes, the development of an enemy is due to certain differences in your characters and events have led to that. Other times, some people end up hating you for apparently no reason at all.

Regardless of how you got this enemy, as opposed to the paradigm of fighting fire with fire, consider the following reasons and see why you should actually appreciate your enemies. This article will show you not only how to not be bothered by your enemies, but how to actually foster love for them.

Read on to learn the secret.

1. It’s a practical lesson in anger management

To be honest, your enemies are the best people to help you understand your sense of anger management. When it might be true that your enemies have a way of bringing out the worst in you as regards anger, it is also true that they can help you in your quest to have that anger managed. You can’t get truly angry at someone you love and it is only in that time when you get truly annoyed that you learn how to manage it.

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Anger management is more effective when it is in practice and not in theory

Your enemies are like the therapists who you need, but actually don’t want. Inasmuch as you might want to hate them, they provide you an opportunity to control the anger impulse that you have.

2. It’s an opportunity for healthy competition

You might not know it, but your enemies make for great rivals as they help harness the competitor in you (sometimes, you might not even know or bee conversant with this competitive side until you come across an adversary). You get the right motivation to compete and this can go a long way to spur you to victory.

However, while doing so, it is also essential that you remember not to become a worse version of yourself while competing. Working against an adversary is tricky, and you need to ensure that you don’t cause harm to yourself or your morals in the process. Healthy competition is all you need to get out of this.

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3. Their negative comments can help you make a breakthrough

It is true that your enemies never really have much good to say about you. However, in as much as they might be talking out of a place of hate, there might be some truth to what they’re saying.

To wit, whenever you hear something mean or nasty from an enemy, you might want to take a step back and evaluate yourself. There is a chance that what this enemy is saying is true and coming to face that fact is a major step in helping you to become a better person overall. This is another testament to the fact that enemies can be therapists in their own way.

4. Enemies can also be powerful allies

Loving your enemies can also mean making an effort to interact and make peace with them. In the end, if you are able to establish some common ground and patch things up, you’ll have succeeded in making another friend. And who doesn’t need friends?

This can also help you in working with people in the long run. You get to hone your inter-personal skills, and that can be a big plus to your ledger.

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5. It gives you the ability to realize positivity

In a multitude of negativity, a speck of positivity always seems to find its way through.

Sometimes, a knowledge of the fact that you have enemies will also help you to focus on the many positives and good things that are in your life. A lot of times, we neglect what really matters in life. This can be due to being overly concerned with the enemies we have.

However, it is also possible for this acknowledgement to spur you to take a step back and appreciate the goo things (and people who surround you).

6. There might just be a misunderstanding

Sometimes, the reason why you have an enemy might be something very innocuous. You might not have known the cause of this fractured relationship and your enemy will help complete the picture.

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Simply approaching them will help you to understand the reason for the fracture. This, in turn, can help you to work towards healing your relationship moving forward. Misunderstandings happen, and you need to be able to work around them.

7. You learn to appreciate love as well

A constant reminder of the fact that there are enemies will also help you not to take those who love you for granted. Love and hate are two opposing emotions and it is possible for one to momentarily overshadow the other.

However, while you’ll always have enemies, there will also always be people who love you. These people need to be appreciated for what they do for you. Never let the hate projected to you from your enemies take the place of that.

8. Do you really need the hate?

The truth is that enemies bring only toxic emotions and generate bad reactions from you. If you’re truly to live a prosperous life, you can’t really be carrying all this baggage around.

Hate is bad and you should try all you can to get rid of it. It is a well-known fact that nobody can get really far in life while carrying a lot of emotional baggage. Well, hate is the biggest form of emotional baggage there is.

Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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