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The 5 Secrets of Playful People

The 5 Secrets of Playful People

Walk through any park on any given day after school, and you will most likely see and hear a bunch of kids running around with abandon, laughing, and having a super time doing what most kids do best – playing.

Unfortunately though, once those rambunctious kids reach a certain age, for most of them, playing will just be a fond memory from their childhood. I have a question for you. Where is it written that adults can’t play? Did you know that there is a significant amount of research that shows us why, as adults, we need to be incorporating play into our daily lives?

The benefits are numerous: Playtime lowers our stress levels, boosts our creativity and problem solving skills, enables us to develop deeper connections with others, and it’s shown to improve our brain activity. If the recent popularity of adult coloring books is anything to go by, I’d say we’re ready to let our inner child let loose and run free.

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Here are 5 tips to bring more play into your life:

1. Schedule playtime

Scheduling sounds like a very grown up thing to do, doesn’t it? But let’s face it, we are all incredibly busy – rushing to get the kids ready in the morning, rushing to work, and then at the end of the workday, rushing home to get dinner ready. In fact, we spend so much time rushing around, we often forget to slow down and enjoy the moment.

A suggestion: schedule a playtime. Treat it as you would your regular yoga lesson or going to the gym. Put a time and day in your calendar and don’t allow yourself off the hook – even if you have a lot of work or are tired! Playtime can be anything you want it to be, from picking up a ball and playing fetch with your dog, or building a Lego car. It doesn’t matter what you do; it’s about the attitude you bring to it.

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2. Bring back family game night

Do you remember times as a kid when you’d sit around the dinner table with your family and play a board game? Why not reintroduce family game night at home? Playtime helps build relationships, strengthen connections, and has the added bonus of teaching the kids how to be ‘good’ losers. Besides, there really is nothing better than sitting around the table and hearing your whole family engaged in conversation and laughter.

3. Take a few toys to work

Our workplaces can be sterile and brain numbing places at times, so why not bring in a few toys? Grab some from home or buy a selection to brighten up your work place. When you find yourself stuck on how to solve a problem, or you’ve had a particularly stressful phone call, give yourself a 5 to 10 minute toy break. I guarantee that if you let loose and totally focus on the joy of playing, you’ll be able to return to what you were doing before with a new perspective.

Recently I’ve taken up juggling: whenever I feel the need to take a break, I stop what I’m doing and juggle. It’s great fun, it automatically gets me to focus on the juggling itself, it’s a great de-stressor, and it’s been shown to help improve memory and creativity.

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4. Dance like nobody’s watching

Next time you’re in the car and a cool tune comes on, crank up the radio and boogie in your seat. Go on – I dare you! Nobody’s watching; and even if they are, they’ll smile when they see you dancing away in your seat. Once you get comfortable with seat dancing, you can expand to busting out a few moves in the office lunchroom or at home after a long day at work. Who knows…you may just start a dance party (plus it’s fantastic exercise)!

5. Organize a play date with friends

Call up one or a few friends and organize a play date. Meet in a central location, pull a coin out of your purse and then explain to everyone that you are leaving your adventure today up to fate. Get someone to call up for heads and down for tails, and then toss the coin to see where you’re going.

Each time a decision has to be made, give yourself two options (for example, do we stop for a coffee or keep walking?) and toss the coin to find your answer. Enjoy the freedom of not knowing in advance where you’re going or what you’ll end up doing.

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The key point to remember is that play is not a luxury but a necessity if you want to live a healthy, creative, and joyful life. Don’t leave playtime just to the kids or your dog. Get out there, embrace that inner child and laugh until you cry!

Featured photo credit: Fotolia via au.fotolia.com

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Fran Sorin

Author, Coach, Speaker

The 5 Secrets of Playful People

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Last Updated on October 16, 2019

5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

We all have relationships. We have acquaintances, relatives, colleagues, neighbors and friends. However, for a large percentage of us, many of these relationships are not fulfilling.

They are unfulfilling because they lack real strength; and they lack real strength because they lack real depth.

Unfortunately, in today’s society, we tend to have shallow, superficial relationships with others, and it’s extremely hard for this kind of relationships to provide anything more than faint satisfaction.

I’d like to show you, based on my experience as a communication and confidence coach, how you can add a significant amount of depth, and thus strength, to your relationships and make your social life a whole lot more meaningful.

Here’re 5 simple yet powerful ways for meaningful relationships building:

1. Meet More People

This is an apparent paradox, but the quality of the people you meet has considerably to do with the quantity of people you meet.

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If you don’t know a lot of people and you barely meet one or two new people every season of the year, considering the variety of individuals out there, you won’t meet very often people who are a good match with you in terms of personality, interests and values.

And since this natural match plays a huge part in building strong relationships, you’ll just as seldom have the opportunity to develop strong relationships.

Conversely, if you go out a lot, you meet a lot of new people and you constantly expand your social circle, you’re much more likely to meet people you match up well with, and these people have a tremendous potential to become good friends, reliable partners, etc.

This is why it’s important to meet more people.

2. Talk about the Things That Matter To You

A relationship becomes the strongest when two people discover they believe in the same things and have similar interests. It’s these commonalities regarding values and interests that create the strongest emotional connection.

I’ve noticed that many people keep conversations shallow. They talk about trivial stuff such as the weather, what’s on TV, the lives of various movie stars, but they rarely talk about what really matters to them in life. This is a mistake from my perspective, because it’s the perfect method for a relationship to not develop.

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Talk about the things that truly matter to you and give others a chance to know what you care about and what you believe in. If they believe in the same things and they care about the same things, they’ll eagerly let you know. Thus you’ll find meaningful common ground and you’ll feel more connected.

3. Express Vulnerability

Many people try to come off as perfect. They don’t talk about their failures, they hide their shortcomings and they never say anything that could embarrass them.

This is all just a facade though. You may appear perfect to some, but you know you’re not perfect and they know that too. You’re only human and humans have flaws.

However, by hiding your flaws, what you do succeed in is appearing cold and impersonal. You seem like a marble statue rather than a real person. And this makes it very hard for anyone to connect with you emotionally.

Humans connect with other humans, not with ideals. Keep this in mind and don’t be afraid to let your vulnerability and your humanity show. This is what takes a relationship to the next level.

Take a look at this article and find out Why Showing Vulnerability Actually Proves Your Strength.

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4. Have Integrity

Integrity, as I see it, is the alignment between your thoughts, your words and your actions. When you say what you think and you do what you said you’ll do, you have integrity.

This is a crucial trait because if you have integrity, people can trust you. They can trust you to give them an honest feedback, even when it’s hard to shallow, and they can trust you to keep your promises.

This trust is one of the central pillars of a strong relationship, both in your personal and your professional life. So, as challenging as it can be sometimes, always try to have integrity.

Be honest with the people around you, even when this will initially hurt them. It’s more important for them to trust you than to not feel hurt. And always do what you promised. Even better, think twice before you promise anything, and only promise what you really can and you are willing to do.

5. Be There for Others

Another central pillar of strong relationships is support. Connections between people grow sturdy if they can rely on each other for support when it’s needed, whether that support means a few kind words or several massive actions.

Of course, you can’t be there for everybody, all the time. Your time, energy and other resources are limited. But what you can do is identify the genuinely important people in your life and then seek to be there as much as possible, at least for them.

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Your support will help them practically, and it will comfort them emotionally; which makes one hell of a difference in a relationship.

The Bottom Line

With the right mindset and the right behavior, you can strengthen a wide range of relationships in your life and advance them as far as they can be advanced.

And with strong relationships, not only that you feel more fulfilled, but you feel more connected to the entire world. You feel that your life has real value, you have more fun and you live in the moment. An entire world of opportunities opens up in front of you.

Then your task is to simply walk through the open doors.

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