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3 Easy Ways to be Twice As Confident in 70 Days

3 Easy Ways to be Twice As Confident in 70 Days

Having the confidence to back yourself even when people are turning their back on you is an important skill in life. People who rely on others to boost them when they’re feeling down ultimately may not be prepared for the hardships they will have to face when bad things happen. Sometimes, these bad things are self-imposed, for example, when you’re striving to achieve a personal goal.

James Altucher is a prolific writer. With experience running several businesses and failing at them, he’s fast-tracked his personal growth and has a lot to share about how you can become a better person. If you read any of his blogs, there is a piece of advice that he mentions a lot: improve by 1% every day.

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If you do the maths, improving by 1% every day actually means that you will be 100% better after 70 days. This applies to everything you want to do: fitness, intelligence, emotional well being, and confidence. Question is, what can you do on a daily basis that will allow you to be twice as confident in 70 days? Here are 3 suggestions:

1. Talk to Someone New Every Day

Human beings are social creatures. We can be made antisocial by bad habits, like playing video games all day. We look for solutions to confidence when the answer is right in front of us: it’s each other. So many of us feel like we’re alone even when we’re surrounded by people, but how many of us actually try to reach out to someone else?

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We’re afraid of being rejected, which is why we don’t reach out. We don’t reach out because we have low self-confidence. In this case though, biting the bullet and facing the rejection is the antidote of low self-confidence. It might hurt every time we reach out to someone. They might think we’re weirdos, but imagine talking to a new person every day for 70 days… every day your confidence will increase.

2. Saying ‘No’

Our society is built on agreement. We all want to please and make sure that our relationships are in harmony with the people around us. Unfortunately, when it comes to growth, this won’t improve you one bit. Disagreements, while being mildly painful, actually force people to listen to you. It also forces you to think of what you want and the reasoning behind it.

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Saying ‘no’ doesn’t mean you’re necessarily disagreeable either. It actually means that you’re attentive and caring. You hear what someone is saying and you’re suggesting something else which could be a better fit. The problem with saying ‘no’ is that some people are just scared of doing it.

By changing your opinion around this, you end up being more confident and having the ability to gracefully disagree with someone. This ultimately ends up making you into a more thoughtful person that people respect.

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3. Writing Online

Everyone’s got a voice. Some people prefer to speak orally, others prefer to write. A lot of wannabe writers are perfectionists. What ends up happening is that they get so caught up in chasing perfection that they don’t polish or hone their voice. It ends up reading and sounding unauthentic, forced, and unsure.

Confidence comes from being yourself. Writing online is no exception. A lot of bloggers now started off years ago just writing and aligning their words with how they naturally talk. In a world where everyone’s trying to be perfect, it’s ironic that natural conversation is the most confident sort of conversation. Write online everyday for 70 days on sites like Lifehack.org with big audiences and you will be surprised by how much more confident you will feel with yourself.

So, have you got another suggestion? What helps you feel more confident?

Featured photo credit: North Jersey Hypnosis via northjerseyhypnosis.com

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Last Updated on July 13, 2020

How Not to Feel Overwhelmed at Work & Take Control of Your Day

How Not to Feel Overwhelmed at Work & Take Control of Your Day

Overwhelm is a pernicious state largely caused by the ever-increasing demands on our time and the distractions that exist all around us. It creeps up on us and can, in its extreme form, leave us feeling anxious, stressed and exhausted.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed at work, here are 6 strategies you can follow that will reduce the feeling of overwhelm; leaving you calmer, in control and a lot less stressed.

1. Write Everything down to Offload Your Mind

The first thing you can do when you begin to feel overwhelmed is to write everything down that is on your mind.

Often people just write down all the things they think they have to do. This does help, but a more effective way to reduce overwhelm is to also write down everything that’s on your mind.

For example, you may have had an argument with your colleague or a loved one. If it’s on your mind write it down. A good way to do this is to draw a line down the middle of the page and title one section “things to do” and the other “what’s on my mind”.

The act of writing all this down and getting it out of your head will begin the process of removing your feeling of overwhelm. Writing things down can really change your life.

2. Decide How Long It Will Take to Complete Your To-Dos

Once you have ‘emptied your head,’ go through your list and estimate how long it will take to complete each to-do.

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As you go through your list, you will find quite a few to-dos will only take you five or ten minutes. Others will take longer, often up to several hours.

Do not worry about that at this stage. Just focus on estimating how long you will need to complete each task to the best of your ability. Here’s How to Cultivate a More Meaningful To Do List.

3. Take Advantage of Parkinson’s Law

Now here’s a little trick I learned a long time ago. Parkinson’s Law states that work will fill the time you have available to complete it, and us humans are terrible at estimating how long something will take:((Odhable: Genesis of Parkinson’s Law))

    This is why many people are always late. They think it will only take them thirty minutes to drive across town when previous experience has taught them it usually takes forty-five minutes to do so because traffic is often bad but they stick to the belief it will only take thirty minutes. It’s more wishful thinking than good judgment.

    We can use Parkinson’s Law to our advantage. If you have estimated that to write five emails that desperately need a reply to be ninety minutes, then reduce it down to one hour. Likewise, if you have estimated it will take you three hours to prepare your upcoming presentation, reduce it down to two hours.

    Reducing the time you estimate something will take gives you two advantages. The first is you get your work done quicker, obviously. The second is you put yourself under a little time pressure and in doing so you reduce the likelihood you will be distracted or allow yourself to procrastinate.

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    When we overestimate how long something will take, subconsciously our brains know we have plenty of time and so it plays tricks on us and we end up checking reviews of the Apple Watch 4 or allow our colleagues to interrupt us with the latest office gossip.

    Applying a little time pressure prevents this from happening and we get more focused and more work done.

    4. Use the Power of Your Calendar

    Once you have your time estimates done, open up your calendar and schedule your to-dos. Go through your to-dos and schedule time on your calendar for doing those tasks. Group tasks up into similar tasks.

    For emails that need attention on your to-do list, schedule time on your calendar to deal with all your emails at once. Likewise, if you have a report to write or a presentation to prepare, add these to your calendar using your estimated time as a guide for how long each will take.

    Seeing these items on your calendar eases your mind because you know you have allocated time to get them done and you no longer feel you have no time. Grouping similar tasks together keeps you in a focused state longer and it’s amazing how much work you get done when you do this.

    5. Make Decisions

    For those things you wrote down that are on your mind but are not tasks, make a decision about what you will do with each one. These things are on your mind because you have not made a decision about them.

    If you have an issue with a colleague, a friend or a loved one, take a little time to think about what would be the best way to resolve the problem. More often than not just talking with the person involved will clear the air and resolve the problem.

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    If it is a more serious issue, then decide how best to deal with it. Talk to your boss, a colleague and get advice.

    Whatever you do, do not allow it to fester. Ignoring the problem will not make it go away. You need to make a decision to deal with it and the sooner you do so the sooner the problem will be resolved. (You can take a look at this guide on How To Make Good Decisions All The Time.)

    I remember long ago, when I was in my early twenties and had gone mad with my newly acquired credit cards. I discovered I didn’t have the money to pay my monthly bills. I worried about it for days, got stressed and really didn’t know what to do. Eventually, I told a good friend of mine of the problem. He suggested I called the credit card company to explain my problem. The next day, I plucked up the courage to call the company, explained my problem and the wonderful person the other end listened and then suggested I paid a smaller amount for a couple of months.

    This one phone call took no more than ten minutes to make, yet it solved my problem and took away a lot of the stress I was feeling at the time. I learned two very valuable lessons from that experience:

    The first, don’t go mad with newly acquired credit cards! And the second, there’s always a solution to every problem if you just talk to the right person.

    6. Take Some Form of Action

    Because overwhelm is something that creeps up on us, once we feel overwhelmed (and stressed as the two often go together), the key is to take some form of action.

    The act of writing everything down that is bothering you and causing you to feel overwhelmed is a great place to start. Being able to see what it is that is bothering you in a list form, no matter how long that list is, eases the mind. You have externalized it.

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    It also means rather than these worries floating around in a jumbled mess inside your head, they are now visible and you can make decisions easier about what to do about them. Often it could be asking a colleague for a little help, or it could be you see you need to allocate some focused time to get the work done. The important thing is you make a decision on what to do next.

    Overwhelm is not always caused by a feeling of having a lack of time or too much work, it can also be caused by avoiding a decision about what to do next.

    The Bottom Line

    Make a decision, even if it is to just talk to someone about what to do next. Making a decision about how you will resolve something on its own will reduce your feelings of overwhelm and start you down the path to a resolution one way or another.

    When you follow these strategies to can say goodbye to your overwhelm and gain much more control over your day.

    More Tips for Reducing Work Stress

    Featured photo credit: Andrei Lazarev via unsplash.com

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