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9 Things To Declutter From Your Life To Be Much Happier

9 Things To Declutter From Your Life To Be Much Happier

Throughout life, just as we collect items, we collect thoughts. Every now and then it’s necessary to clean your home and refresh your mind to lighten the load of what’s been collected. If you feel that you have to declutter many physical possessions, first think about why that is. Know that decluttering isn’t simply organizing your things. It’s determining what is essential and what it adds to your life. You’ll be surprised how minimizing your possessions causes you to re-evaluate your life. Decluttering forces you to make certain decisions like using or losing your hobby materials sitting around the house. You may be surprised how much happier you’ll be after you completely declutter your life.

1. Cotton clutter

Does consumer culture have you buying more clothes for a rush of dopamines? In other words, are you excited by the idea of having more clothes or the experiences you’ll have in them? You may be long overdue to downsize your closet if you’re doing laundry quite a bit.

You’ve likely heard it before; if you haven’t worn it in a year or more, it’s time to go. If you’re the type of person that attaches sentimental value to everything you may have trouble with this. Have depth to your sentimental attachment and keep the things that deeply matter to you, like your wedding dress, graduation attire, vacation memento, etc.

2. People who don’t align with where you want to be

You know who they are. They do not add any value to your life by showing you what they ate for dinner. Those who don’t align with your future-self fall into two categories; you know them intimately or not much at all. They’re the people who you may not know so well on Facebook and Instagram. It may seem harmless to browse down their timeline, but those moments you’re spending could be spent making a real connection.

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Use the social networks for their highest good by communicating and creating content for people who are important in your life. It can be difficult to remove people from your life that are closer to you. Look at the top five people you surround yourself with and honestly ask yourself if any of them are where you want to be in 20 years.

3. No more junk drawers, closets, and rooms

Decluttering your life benefits you physically, emotionally, and mentally. You can get the mental and emotional benefits by improving your environment first. Eliminate all “junk” areas from your home.

No more junk drawers filled with random items allowed. This is a form of physical clutter which has its equivalent in your mind. Some people have closets or entire rooms written off as “storage”, but you know what it really is.

4. Unhealthy snack options

You may not think of a snack as clutter. Your body takes what you consume and uses it to form everything that you are. Junk food in your kitchen eventually becomes clutter in your body. Your body has to work to process out any preservatives and chemicals you eat.

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The more unhealthy snacks you easily let slip in between meals and activities, the less healthy you are. Poor health can make your mind foggy, physically drain you, and even affects your attitude. Put healthy snacks in your kitchen, you’ll eat them simply because they’re there.

5. Unfinished business

When you leave loose ends, you have to remember to go tie them back together. Having to remember unfinished business is a drain on your mental energy. You may even feel some level of guilt for not completing a project, not making a call or not giving your best.

These thoughts are mental blocks that you should live without. If you let too many things go unfinished they might make you feel guilty, ashamed or reluctant to take action again. So, even if you think you’re behind in the race, finish. Give yourself the warm satisfaction of knowing you did what was right. Whether it is scheduling a meeting or launching a project, tie your loose ends.

6. Commitments that don’t serve you

Does paying for a monthly makeup or outdoor gear subscription box for the next 6 months really serve you? Of course, you want to have the highest quality of life possible. Should you collect more things or should the funds for the subscription box be used towards a more worthy cause? This is a commitment you made that may no longer serve your best interest or your wallet.

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Especially if you already have mounds of whatever the subscription box offers. You may end up with a lot of excess products getting automatic shipments every month. Say “No” more often, so you can spend time and money on the things that are truly important to you. Your true friends will still love you if you pass on Thirsty Thursday at the bar. What can you cut down time doing to get more time to work on goals or practice your craft?

7. Worries clouding your mind

Declutter your mind from incessant thinking. It may seem normal to want to think all of the time. Yet, many people who still their mind through meditation or yoga find it easier to direct thought because of the practice. You can’t expect yourself to be able to devote undivided focus to something when you can’t quiet your own thoughts.

Letting your thoughts run rampant really prevents you from giving 100% of yourself to whatever you’re doing. Your mind is designed to constantly look for potential dangers and you have to consciously quiet that. It serves you better to have a seat with your eyes closed and view the blank screen of your mind.

8. All of the paper you don’t need

Are you guilty of having a drawer full of papers? Go digital where you can. Paperwork adds up over time, leading you to have cluttered areas in your home, which you swear have important documents.

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Loose paper around your home breeds more of the same, leading to stacks of paper that only get thicker. Having a digital copy of important documents and even instruction manuals can help alleviate some of your worries about losing the hard copy.

9. Tell it like it is- it’s trash

Yes. Sometimes decluttering consists of getting rid of trash and dusty old items. Have you ever noticed how trash seems to collect in piles? You need to actively work to keep trash down to a minimum or you’ll attract more trash. You may not call all of the trash in your home, car or office trash. You may tell yourself, “I might need that one day”.

Tell that pair of underwear that has seen better times goodbye. If you have items you have never used for more than six months, get rid of it. If you can live without it for that long, it’s trash to you and someone else can enjoyably use it. Consider how much you really care about anything that’s been dusty and in your garage for more than six months.

Decluttering your life is so much more than organizing what’s under your bed into bins. You have to get rid of unneeded clothes, people, worrisome thoughts, unhealthy food, and trash. Decluttering negativity from your life on so many levels is going to have a deep and beneficial impact on your life. You’ll notice the difference. Get ready to walk lighter, feel free, and think more positive thoughts about yourself and the people around you.

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Last Updated on February 21, 2019

The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

In business, in social relationships, in family… In whatever context conflict is always inevitable, especially when you are in the leader role. This role equals “make decisions for the best of majority” and the remaining are not amused. Conflicts arise.

Conflicts arise when we want to push for a better quality work but some members want to take a break from work.

Conflicts arise when we as citizens want more recreational facilities but the Government has to balance the needs to maintain tourism growth.

Conflicts are literally everywhere.

Avoiding Conflicts a No-No and Resolving Conflicts a Win-Win

Avoiding conflicts seem to be a viable option for us. The cruel fact is, it isn’t. Conflicts won’t walk away by themselves. They will, instead, escalate and haunt you back even more when we finally realize that’s no way we can let it be.

Moreover, avoiding conflicts will eventually intensify the misunderstanding among the involved parties. And the misunderstanding severely hinders open communication which later on the parties tend to keep things secret. This is obviously detrimental to teamwork.

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Some may view conflicts as the last step before arguments. And they thus leave it aside as if they never happen. This is not true.

Conflicts are the intersect point between different individuals with different opinions. And this does not necessarily lead to argument.

Instead, proper handling of conflicts can actually result in a win-win situation – both parties are pleased and allies are gained. A better understanding between each other and future conflicts are less likely to happen.

The IBR Approach to Resolve Conflicts

Here, we introduce to you an effective approach to resolve conflicts – the Interest-Based Relational (IBR) approach. The IBR approach was developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in their 1981 book Getting to Yes. It stresses the importance of the separation between people and their emotions from the problem. Another focus of the approach is to build mutual understanding and respect as they strengthen bonds among parties and can ultimately help resolve conflicts in a harmonious way. The approach suggests a 6-step procedure for conflict resolution:

Step 1: Prioritize Good Relationships

How? Before addressing the problem or even starting the discussion, make it clear the conflict can result in a mutual trouble and through subsequent respectful negotiation the conflict can be resolved peacefully. And that brings the best outcome to the whole team by working together.

Why? It is easy to overlook own cause of the conflict and point the finger to the members with different opinions. With such a mindset, it is likely to blame rather than to listen to the others and fail to acknowledge the problem completely. Such a discussion manner will undermine the good relationships among the members and aggravate the problem.

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Example: Before discussion, stress that the problem is never one’s complete fault. Everyone is responsible for it. Then, it is important to point out our own involvement in the problem and state clearly we are here to listen to everyone’s opinions rather than accusing others.

Step 2: People Are NOT the Cause of Problem

How? State clearly the problem is never one-sided. Collaborative effort is needed. More importantly, note the problem should not be taken personally. We are not making accusations on persons but addressing the problem itself.

Why? Once things taken personally, everything will go out of control. People will become irrational and neglect others’ opinions. We are then unable to address the problem properly because we cannot grasp a fuller and clearer picture of the problem due to presumption.

Example: In spite of the confronting opinions, we have to emphasize that the problem is not a result of the persons but probably the different perspectives to view it. So, if we try to look at the problem from the other’s perspective, we may understand why there are varied opinions.

Step 3: Listen From ALL Stances

How? Do NOT blame others. It is of utmost importance. Ask for everyone’s opinions. It is important to let everyone feel that they contribute to the discussion. Tell them their involvement is essential to solve the problem and their effort is very much appreciated.

Why? None wants to be ignored. If one feels neglected, it is very likely for he/she to be aggressive. It is definitely not what we hope to see in a discussion. Acknowledging and being acknowledged are equally important. So, make sure everyone has equal opportunity to express their views. Also, realizing their opinions are not neglected, they will be more receptive to other opinions.

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Example: A little trick can played here: Invite others to talk first. It is an easy way to let others feel involved and ,more importantly, know their voices are heard. Also, we can show that we are actively listening to them by giving direct eye-contact and nodding. One important to note is that never interrupt anyone. Always let them finish first beforeanother one begins.

Step 4: Listen Comes First, Talk Follows

How? Ensure everyone has listened to one another points of view. It can be done by taking turn to speak and leaving the discussion part at last. State once again the problem is nothing personal and no accusation should be made.

Why? By turn-taking, everyone can finish talking and voices of all sides can be heard indiscriminantly. This can promote willingness to listen to opposing opinions.

Example: We can prepare pieces of paper with different numbers written on them. Then, ask different members to pick one and talk according to the sequence of the number. After everyone’s finished, advise everyone to use “I” more than “You” in the discussion period to avoid others thinking that it is an accusation.

Step 5: Understand the Facts, Then Address the Problem

How? List out ALL the facts first. Ask everyone to tell what they know about the problems.

Why? Sometimes your facts are unknown to the others while they may know something we don’t. Missing out on these facts could possibly lead to inaccurate capture of the problem. Also, different known facts can lead to different perception of the matter. It also helps everyone better understand the problem and can eventually help reach a solution.

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Example: While everyone is expressing their own views, ask them to write down everything they know that is true to the problem. As soon as everyone has finished, all facts can be noted and everyone’s understanding of the problem is raised.

Step 6: Solve the Problem Together

How? Knowing what everyone’s thinking, it is now time to resolve the conflict. Up to this point, everyone should have understood the problem better. So, it is everyone’s time to suggest some solutions. It is important not to have one giving all the solutions.

Why? Having everyone suggesting their solutions is important as they will not feel excluded and their opinions are considered. Besides, it may also generate more solutions that can better resolve the conflicts. Everyone will more likely be satisfied with the result.

Example: After discussion, ask all members to suggest any possible solutions and stress that all solutions are welcomed. State clearly that we are looking for the best outcomes for everyone’s sake rather than battling to win over one another. Then, evaluate all the solutions and pick the one that is in favor of everyone.

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