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Psychologists Say Quick Showers Mean You’re Happy With Your Life

Psychologists Say Quick Showers Mean You’re Happy With Your Life

Feeling dirty? Whose up for a quickie?

I’m talking a shower here people. Seriously. How do you feel about taking a shower? Do you view showering as a routine part of your daily hygiene, like brushing your teeth? Are you in and out in less than 5 minutes? Is a shower simply a means to an end rather than some deeply cathartic process in which you take great pleasure and can spend countless hours doing?

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If so, you are one happy individual–literally.

Research shows that the longer and more frequently you shower, the lonelier, and less happy you probably are. Psychologist and Yale researcher, John Bargh, PhD., conducted a study of physical warmth and social connection. He concluded:

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“The lonelier a person is, the more showers and baths they take, the hotter the water, and the longer they stay under the water.”

The study found that people use the physical warmth of a shower or bath to compensate for and replace the social warmth they crave. In addition to finding emotional comfort through the physical warmth of the water, those who like to take extended showers or baths also use that time to daydream. They tend to mull over problems or just let their mind run free. However, this sort of mismatch of thought is another avenue leading to unhappiness.

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Harvard psychologists, Matthew Killingsworth and Daniel Gilbert, conducted a study to determine if mental focus affects happiness. They discovered that a large fraction of our thoughts – almost half – are not related to what we’re doing. An article published in Scientific America puts it this way:

“While you might hope all this mental wandering is taking us to happier places, the data say otherwise. Just like the wise traditions teach, we’re happiest when thought and action are aligned, even if they’re only aligned to wash dishes.”

Those who like to shower quick don’t have this problem.

If you are one of those who only likes the quickie routine, when you shower you are in the zone. Your thoughts are streamlined and focused. You are completely absorbed and engaged in the task at hand–getting clean. The tub is not a think tank for you. Emotionally, you tend to find yourself in a good space. You are most likely well-connected and socially satisfied. You generally feel loved, valued, and appreciated by your family and friends. You are also less likely to feel (or become) isolated, withdrawn, and depressed.

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More by this author

Denise Hill

Denise shares about psychology and communication tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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