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7 Healthy Ways to Deal With Anger

7 Healthy Ways to Deal With Anger

Anger is a part of life. We will all come into contact with a person, or a circumstance, that results in us feeling angry. But anger varies on a great scale, ranging from mild annoyance to intense rage. Studies have shown that due to environmental, genetic, and psychological factors, certain people are more susceptible to anger than others. Some people are noticeably angry, others more internally irritable.

Yet when anger becomes too strong it can grow out of context, and we are more incensed than what is considered to be normal. We must find ways to release anger before it multiplies within us. And while it is good to “release the rage” it must be done in ways that are both responsible and cathartic. In other words, we must find resourceful ways to deal with our anger that are also peaceful and beneficial for our health and for those around us. These are a few tried and tested tactics that we can keep with us in times of need.

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7 Ways To Deal With Anger

1.Take 5/ Pause

Seemingly the most sensible of options is often the easiest and most rewarding. The first step is to recognize that the anger is happening. When you feel it bubble up, step away for a minute, pause, and breathe deeply from your diaphragm. Visualize something relaxing. Do this before having a reaction. You will thank yourself.

2. Cognitive rehabilitation

This means to replace negative, unhelpful thoughts with more positive, realistic ones. For example “I am so bad at this!” could be replaced with “Even though this is frustrating, anger will not help me right now.” Again use breathing techniques to pause and reassess. 

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3. Write

A great way to express yourself and release aggression is through writing. It might be the last thing you feel like doing in the moment, but if you can get into a habit of putting your pen to the paper and writing out how you feel, it can become a very helpful habit in times to come. You can tear up the end product if you wish! But getting it out is the main point. (Even if you scrawl really, really hard.)

4. Communicate

Verbalize your meaning. Say what you really wish to say. Listen to what is being said to you, and listen also to what you are really wishing to convey. Try not to let the anger take over (again, step 1). Even though we may feel defensive straight away, if we take the time to better understand the situation, we can get a far more peaceful and happy result.

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5. Have a sense of humor

Silliness can be a great tool. And while it is not healthy to ‘laugh off’ and dismiss your feelings, having a mentally silly picture you can reach for in times of anger can help diffuse the heat. We aren’t talking sarcasm or bitter humour, which is also unhelpful. Just enough silliness to again be able to cool things down enough to deal with the situation rationally.

6. Exercise

Go for a run. Go for a walk. Go to a spinning class. Do anything that will get rid of that anxious energy that is building up inside you, that might otherwise explode in different areas. Release the hostility and just literally blow off the steam. Then see how you feel, when the anger has been physically exhausted. 

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7. Sleep it off

Don’t deal with things when you are tired. If you are grumpy or run down, you can easily snap or say or do things you don’t really mean. Get some rest. Let it cool down. Deal with it in the morning, when your feelings have moved somewhat. And they will. That’s the beauty of feelings. They always change.

Featured photo credit: Albumarium via albumarium.com

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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