Advertising
Advertising

This Is What Happens When You Disconnect For 24 Hours

This Is What Happens When You Disconnect For 24 Hours

If you’re like me, you know it’s hard as anything, un-tethering yourself from your smartphone, iPad and laptop – first at work and then at home. Frankly, to disconnect can be tough as withdrawal (not kidding, folks).

But hey, you know it’s hurting your relationships at home and work. People have told you to your face to stop. But you just can’t. There’s always something pulling you toward that Facebook feed, that Pinterest board, then CNN for news, then TMZ (ok, you’re on your own, if that’s the case). Then once again, a vicious cycle.

Today’s the day. You have decided to “forget” your phone and other electronics, leave them be and see what happens.

It isn’t easy, let me tell you, but the best thing that has happened to me since I started roughly 7 years ago. It gives me back a solid, memorable block of time with family and friends, to reconnect, reflect, recharge, restore my “default setting,” if you will. You see, when I was 25, I started keeping Sabbath – the Jewish Sabbath, in my case. Since then, it’s literally my religion to turn off my phone and all devices from sundown on Friday for 25 hours.

Here’s what I’ve learned.

Advertising

1. Your mind will start to clear up from a fog.

Perhaps you can’t remember that last time you found yourself without a working phone or Wifi. Perhaps it was during a hike upstate, up in a plane somewhere or after drowning your iPhone. Sadly, it felt like wasted time. In fact, it was a golden opportunity you missed to rest, to write, reflect, to change things up, to feel more human.

Between the pull of business and the personal, between e-mail and fear of missing out, I’ll be the first to call myself a smartphone addict. However, when that sundown hits on Friday, I turn on “Do Not Disturb” and put the phone away. The endless whirl of tasks and people wanting my attention ceases. The constant pressure of my fear of wasting time begins to lift. My mind and thoughts turn to the Sabbath table, spending time with family. The simple act of eating – and enjoying dinner – with my wife and daughter, sometimes friends is wonderful and human and refreshing. Wine flows, we eat amazing food. Nobody’s in a rush somewhere. When someone asks you how you are, you really take the time to think, reflect and answer thoughtfully. You start remembering just how important family is, how precious your time is with them and friends.

2. You’ll get to infuse your life with novelty again.

The week is all about the auto-pilot. Wake up, then brush your teeth, jump in the subway, get to work, check email, send your updates, then have lunch, back out for coffee around 3 PM, then home at 5 (or later). Once you get home, its not long until you go to bed! And in between, you sneak in Facebook, Pinterest (and TMZ, G-d help you).

Saturday morning, I wake up whenever, no alarm. I spend the best time with my family, eating breakfast, catching up, playing with my daughter, reading a book I’ve long abandoned, a new magazine.

We see the people that we really like – people that like us back, invite us over often, plus new faces. One family gave birth this week, a son. Another’s kid is now engaged. Somebody else got honored at their job. We celebrate the good, reflect on bad things happening and try to make sense of them, leaving with actionable wisdom we can use throughout the week and year. We take a walk. There is a gorgeous garden on the way back home. Imagine everything you are missing in the world around you!

Advertising

3. You’ll notice your senses will revive.

Being busy is easy throughout the week. The weekend can be packed, as well, visiting bars and restaurants, flea markets, brunch, whatever. That pull of being connected is still there. You still can’t focus on the awesome dish you ordered – here’s a text! The wine’s aroma is not quite the same – Mom’s calling!

The simple fact of being away from my devices makes me pause and focus on the food and drink and people right before me, their ideas, my own. I stop, reflect, try to make sense of all the madness going on around me. It puts the busy-ness to rest. Because I can’t be bothered by an email or call or buzz or ring, I start remembering the times when I was young and unconnected. This brings me back to NOW, not the next thing today, tomorrow or next week or month. I like the smell of coffee, tossing an idea around, maybe to read a book together with my daughter, horse around with funny faces, sounds, language constructions or whatever else just comes to mind.

4. You’ll see that time will start to slow down.

The Sabbath is no longer than another day. But when you step away and don’t let others push their emails and demands on you, the time just stretches.

Taking a day off from the rat race – and its long tentacles through technology – brings me back to my original, childhood state for a day. I can laugh and read books I like and have long conversations about things that are really interesting to me without feeling guilty that I’m wasting precious time. I pack so much into those daylight hours on Friday night and Saturday that it makes me wonder why the weekdays seem so short, in comparison.

5. You’ll have a fuller and more meaningful because of rest.

I can’t emphasize how critical taking one day off is for having a productive week. The rest of the week is that much more filled and productive because I can’t work and move things forward (except in my mind) on the Sabbath.

Advertising

Since I’ve started keeping the Sabbath, the paradigm has flipped on its head. I don’t do Sabbath to make for a more fulfilling week. I do a fulfilling week so I can do the Sabbath properly. Because there’s seemingly less time when I have to take off a day, it makes me more eager to accomplish more during the rest of week  and I do!

6. You’ll forget the week’s stresses.

Hello, sleep! Byebye, red, tired eyes. Byebye, ADD. Byebye, guilt. Today, I rest and all of life’s stresses can go fly a kite. Maybe I’ll go fly a kite, myself!

In all seriousness, just taking a nap in the middle of the day after lunch can totally change your week by letting you catch up from those nights with too little sleep. It will really, truly recharge your batteries and give you amazing energy to tackle whatever your issues are with a renewed strength and resolve.

7. You’ll regain purpose in life and remember the reasons why you’re working like a dog through the rest of the week.

It’s not just for your career advancement, more money, more recognition, more stuff you can buy. It’s for your family, for humanity, for your growth and development as a human being. You have a mission in life – to improve the human condition in your particular, unique way. You want great experiences in your life, not just more stuff. A day off from the pressures of the outside world helps you to return to your roots as a human being – not just a cog in some machine.

8. You’ll have a chance to stop and understand what you’re doing wrong.

Without distractions from work or friends and family, you have a rare chance to do some soul-searching and understand what needs fixing. The acknowledgement and calling a spade, a spade is the first step to lasting change for the better.

Advertising

How many times did I have a really bad week and then because of the Sabbath mindset, found a way to move the needle forward on one problem or another? Simply changing my routine a day often uncovered novel solutions or ideas from people I met or a new book or article I read – because I had time and opportunity for it. Breaking my routine and seeing my problems in a different light has been invaluable to transforming myself for the better.

9. You’ll notice improvement in physical and mental health.

Taking the time to cook dinner properly, being surrounded by people you love, ample sleep and real stress relief all have a measurable positive effect on your physical health and mental well-being. Unplugging helps me keep my sanity, focus better, get more down time, plus good food and time with people I enjoy. The rest is commentary.

10. You’ll be more likely to get to work on improving yourself.

This has a tangible difference in pushing you forward after the time you’ve had to rest, reflect and come in contact with new ideas, people and strategies for improvement. You’ll be like a lion rearing to go because you won’t want to go back to being the same person you were a day before. This is how you change things for the better, week after week, regardless of whatever setbacks the week brought you.

Featured photo credit: Death to the Stock Photo via deathtothestockphoto.us5.list-manage2.com

More by this author

Yuri Kruman

Business Coach, Executive Coach + Career Strategist

12 Reminders A Married Man Wants You to Know and Remember 8 Ways to Turn Your Guilt, Shame and Procrastination into Positive Change 23 Proven Strategies to Get Through Any Hardship – and Thrive This Is What Happens When You Disconnect For 24 Hours

Trending in Communication

1 How to Live a Stress Free Life in a Way Most People Don’t 2 Midlife Crisis in Men: The Definitive Survival Guide 3 30 Powerful Success and Failure Quotes That Will Lead You to Success 4 How to Stop Being a Perfectionist (Step-by-Step Guide) 5 How to Stop Comparing Your Life to Others (Step-by-Step Guide)

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on September 30, 2020

How to Live a Stress Free Life in a Way Most People Don’t

How to Live a Stress Free Life in a Way Most People Don’t

Learning how to live a stress free life may seem impossible, but the truth is that there are specific things you can do to begin eliminating sources of stress.

No, it doesn’t look like a made-for-television movie. No, it doesn’t look like something only people with extra time and money can do. It looks like your life—but without any self-created stress triggers.

Here are 11 ways to help you live a stress-free life:

1. Stop Overanalyzing Situations That Haven’t Happened

The first step to living a stress-free life is to stop overanalyzing imaginary scenarios. It’s easy to spend time in the world of worst-case scenarios. People tend to cultivate this world for one of two reasons.

First, because if you know what the worst-case scenario is, then it won’t surprise you when it happens. Second, if you know what the worst-case scenario is, then you can do everything in your power to control the universe so the worst case never happens.

If that’s really the world you want to cultivate, then become a professional risk assessor. If not, then ask yourself how you are benefiting from continuing to live that way.

Does it make you feel better about yourself and your life? Does it make you want to leap out of bed in the morning, eager to embrace the worst-case scenario? Does it bring you joy or fulfillment?

If your answer to these three questions is no, then stop living in the future and bring yourself back into the present.

2. Don’t Take on Other People’s Problems

The whole advantage of other people having problems is that they aren’t your problems. When you frequently take on other people’s problems, you get into the habit of enabling.

Let’s get crystal clear about the definition of enabling: enabling is the art of continuing to take responsibility for other people, thereby disallowing their personal responsibility[1].

It is of no service to other people to take on their problems because they can’t/won’t/don’t know how to fix the problem.

Advertising

It is of service to empower others to take responsibility for themselves and their lives, to encourage, teach, and motivate others to address their own problems. So stop enabling, and start empowering.

3. Get Present in the Moment

Being present in the moment involves being in your body and feeling your feelings—two things that lots of folks actually don’t know how to do.

Ask yourself these two questions: What does fear feel like in your body? What are you afraid of?

If you don’t know the answer to these questions, you probably aren’t present in the moment. Being present involves vulnerability, humility, and openness[2].

How to live a stress free life by being present

    The past and the future stop being so relevant and intriguing when you’re able to get in your body and feel your feelings. When you can do these two things, you actually want to be in the present moment.

    To get started, close your eyes, focus on your breathing, and watch your stress levels drop. Then, try these tips: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying.

    4. Focus on What You Have, Not What You Don’t

    The easiest way to stop focusing on what you don’t have is by not watching TV commercials. Marketing teaches us to focus on what we don’t have, and advertising campaigns spend millions of dollars convincing us that we must have what we don’t yet have.

    Can you think of a marketing campaign that teaches you to enjoy what you already have without buying something to enhance it? Odds are you can’t.

    In a world dictated by Super Bowl commercials and Facebook ads, it takes stalwart focus to recognize what you have more than what you don’t. If you want a stress-free life now, get stalwart, and stop letting other people dictate your focus.

    In order to do this, try cultivating a gratitude practice to help refocus your mind toward what is good in your life. You can get started with this guide.

    Advertising

    5. Stop Surrounding Yourself With People Who Don’t Make You Happy

    Honestly, what kind of people do you really like to be around with? People who get you, who see you clearly, who accept your flaws and all; people you can be yourself with; people who have shared interests?

    How many of those people are in your life? What characteristics do all of the other people in your life have?

    If you find that the people in your life aren’t adding anything positive, it may be time to make some changes. If you find that other relationships you have are downright toxic, start working to cut out those relationships immediately.

    6. Find a Job That Makes You Feel Good

    You don’t have to stay at a job just because it pays the bills. Most people spend more time working than sleeping. The average person spends 40 to 80 hours a week—or 2,000 to 4,000 hours a year—working. That is a significant investment!

    If your best friend or child told you that they were going to spend 4,000 hours giving their emotional, mental, and physical energy to something (or someone) that wasn’t going to value them, give anything back to them, or pay them what they were worth, what advice would you offer? Give that same advice to yourself. You won’t be stress-free unless you don’t learn this[3].

    Here’re 11 Signs That You Should Leave Your Job.

    7. Only Take on What You Can Handle

    Busyness is an addiction. Slowing down can actually be terrifying because it causes you to notice that you have feelings that you now have time to feel.

    I get it.

    By the time I slowed down, I had decades of busyness under my belt. I went into a tailspin depression because I didn’t understand how to be in the right relationship with my own emotions.

    When I finally figured out that feelings are just feelings and allowing them to express themselves is healthy and natural, I stopped experiencing withdrawal from my addiction to busyness and started figuring out the pace of life that felt best for me.

    Remarkably, I discovered that I don’t actually like being busy. What will you discover about yourself?

    Advertising

    8. Let Go of Grudges and Anger

    For me, it took 20 years of adulthood to figure out that holding on to grudges and anger only hurt me. Lucky for you, though, you can benefit vicariously from my experience just by reading one short paragraph!

    No one is holding your feet to the fire, demanding that you hold on to grudges and anger. The energy of anger slowly eats away at your body, mind, and spirit, until one day you wake up more resentful than optimistic.

    One day, people no longer want to be around you because the stink of negativity is oozing out of your pores. One day, you even get tired of hearing yourself get angry. And the person or people you are angry at or holding grudges against probably haven’t been affected at all.

    Who gets hurt the most in that process of repeating negative thoughts? You do.

    Some good advice for you here: How to Let Go of Resentment and Anger

    9. Stop Reliving Your Past

    To live a stress-free life, you have to stop reliving your past. I know it seems like fun to compare everything in your present to your past, and to experience the present through past-colored glasses, but it actually isn’t.

    When you wear past-colored glasses, you can’t truly experience the present for what it is. Your boyfriend or girlfriend gets compared to a list of expectations and failed relationships rather than recognized for the unique blessing they are in your life.

    Your boss gets compared to all the bosses who came before her/him. Your friends’ ability to parent gets compared to your parents’ ability to parent.

    People, including you, deserve to stand on their own past-free merit.

    10. Don’t Complain About Things You Can’t Change

    There are always going to be people elected into office whom you don’t like, taxes that you don’t want to pay, idiot drivers who refuse to move out of the left-hand lane, and a person ahead of you in the check-out line who won’t stop chatting with the clerk.

    The great benefit of being human is that we get to experience all of what life offers us. To live stress-free is to learn to deal with this fact.

    Advertising

    Dwelling on your frustration with something that can’t be changed doesn’t do anything other than drag you down. You are the only person who will ultimately decide how to respond to what is.

    11. Stop Living Through Other People’s Lives

    Someone else’s life is not your life. Your life is your life.

    What that means is you get to live your life in the way you want. You get to make ridiculous mistakes, take leaps of faith, and stuff things inside your handbag of fear just as much as the next person.

    Going through stuff is the whole great messy adventure of being human! Being alive and living life is terrifying and glorious and everything in between.

    Stop living through social media, trying to soak in all of the experiences everyone else is having. Focus, instead, on what it feels like to be you in this moment. You may find you like it.

    Final Thoughts

    An astounding thing happens when you reduce stress and anxiety, get into a relationship with your body, mind, and spirit, and just be yourself without judgment.

    Your life literally slows down. You stop wishing for the weekend. You begin to live in each moment, and you start feeling like a human being. You just ride the wave that is life, with this feeling of contentment and joy.

    You move fluidly, steadily, calmly, and gratefully. A veil is lifted, and a whole new perspective is born through improved mental health. And this is how you live a stress-free life.

    More Tips on How to Live a Stress-Free Life

    Featured photo credit: Drew Coffman via unsplash.com

    Reference

    Read Next