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4 Reasons Why People Who Don’t Rely On Social Media Are More Confident

4 Reasons Why People Who Don’t Rely On Social Media Are More Confident

What’s the first thing you do when you snap a cute photo of you and your BFF? Post it to Instagram, probably. That’s just how social media works. When you have an update to share, it’s hard to find a reason not to tweet or blog about it.

Not everyone is hooked on social media these days, believe it or not. It’s a great way to connect with people you don’t get the chance to see every day, but it doesn’t have to be your lifeline.

There are a few major differences between those who are constantly glued to their social media channels and those who aren’t. Here are five reasons why those who don’t rely on social media to document their lives are more confident than those who do.

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They make more of an effort to maintain relationships

Social media makes it almost too easy to keep in touch with family and friends. Except, by “keeping touch” we actually mean reading their Facebook statuses and liking their photos. It’s a one-sided interaction. When people go long periods of time without posting anything, we lose touch with them immediately. That’s enough to put a dent in anyone’s confidence.

People who don’t rely so heavily on social media actually make an effort to keep in touch with those they care about. They’re willing to sit across from their best friends at a café, with their phone tucked away in their pocket, and share the details of each others’ lives they don’t care to share online. In their world, “I’ll see you later” actually means, “I’m planning on meeting up with you again next week, okay?”

They are more aware of their surroundings

You might feel like you can reach out and touch every inch of the earth through the articles you read and pictures you see others post online, but as you’re sitting at your desk reading about different current events and cultures around the world, there are hundreds of people walking past your office window who have seen those things in real time for themselves.

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Stepping away from social media, at least for the majority of your day, gives you the chance to explore the world around you and observe life through your own eyes. Those who do this are more confident because they don’t need to rely on someone else’s viewpoint of the world to form their own.

They don’t hide behind a screen

Have you ever posted a comment or status saying something you never would have been “brave” enough to say in person? It probably made you feel pretty good at first. “Wow! I can’t believe I posted that,” you thought to yourself as you waited for the likes to roll in. What happens when no one responds, though? That façade of bravery shatters instantly.

When you don’t have a screen in front of you, but you have something to say, do you? People who don’t rely on social media have trained themselves to speak up without a protective shield. Their confidence stems from their ability to express their thoughts openly and verbally, where, often, an audience has no choice but to listen.

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They live in the moment

In this social media-saturated world, an adventure is nothing more than a chance to snap a few pictures to see how many likes and comments they’ll get. You’re not enjoying the concert, really: you’re staring into the screen of your phone to make sure you’re capturing every moment for everyone else to see later. When we’re alone, we scroll through today’s TimeHop memories and secretly cringe at all the things we said back then.

Those who treat social media as a supplement instead of a staple follow their sense of adventure without worrying about how it will look on camera later. They cherish the actual sights and sounds they experienced firsthand. They are also able to leave the unflattering images of their past in the past where they belong. If that’s not enough to boost your confidence, we don’t know what is.

By cutting back on your social media use, you can improve your relationships with loved ones, immerse yourself in the real world again and stop spending so much time looking back on “what used to be.” Like anything, social media won’t hurt you, if you use it in moderation.

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Featured photo credit: Jason Howie via flickr.com

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Last Updated on February 11, 2021

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

How often have you said something simple, only to have the person who you said this to misunderstand it or twist the meaning completely around? Nodding your head in affirmative? Then this means that you are being unclear in your communication.

Communication should be simple, right? It’s all about two people or more talking and explaining something to the other. The problem lies in the talking itself, somehow we end up being unclear, and our words, attitude or even the way of talking becomes a barrier in communication, most of the times unknowingly. We give you six common barriers to communication, and how to get past them; for you to actually say what you mean, and or the other person to understand it as well…

The 6 Walls You Need to Break Down to Make Communication Effective

Think about it this way, a simple phrase like “what do you mean” can be said in many different ways and each different way would end up “communicating” something else entirely. Scream it at the other person, and the perception would be anger. Whisper this is someone’s ear and others may take it as if you were plotting something. Say it in another language, and no one gets what you mean at all, if they don’t speak it… This is what we mean when we say that talking or saying something that’s clear in your head, many not mean that you have successfully communicated it across to your intended audience – thus what you say and how, where and why you said it – at times become barriers to communication.[1]

Perceptual Barrier

The moment you say something in a confrontational, sarcastic, angry or emotional tone, you have set up perceptual barriers to communication. The other person or people to whom you are trying to communicate your point get the message that you are disinterested in what you are saying and sort of turn a deaf ear. In effect, you are yelling your point across to person who might as well be deaf![2]

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The problem: When you have a tone that’s not particularly positive, a body language that denotes your own disinterest in the situation and let your own stereotypes and misgivings enter the conversation via the way you talk and gesture, the other person perceives what you saying an entirely different manner than say if you said the same while smiling and catching their gaze.

The solution: Start the conversation on a positive note, and don’t let what you think color your tone, gestures of body language. Maintain eye contact with your audience, and smile openly and wholeheartedly…

Attitudinal Barrier

Some people, if you would excuse the language, are simply badass and in general are unable to form relationships or even a common point of communication with others, due to their habit of thinking to highly or too lowly of them. They basically have an attitude problem – since they hold themselves in high esteem, they are unable to form genuine lines of communication with anyone. The same is true if they think too little of themselves as well.[3]

The problem: If anyone at work, or even in your family, tends to roam around with a superior air – anything they say is likely to be taken by you and the others with a pinch, or even a bag of salt. Simply because whenever they talk, the first thing to come out of it is their condescending attitude. And in case there’s someone with an inferiority complex, their incessant self-pity forms barriers to communication.

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The solution: Use simple words and an encouraging smile to communicate effectively – and stick to constructive criticism, and not criticism because you are a perfectionist. If you see someone doing a good job, let them know, and disregard the thought that you could have done it better. It’s their job so measure them by industry standards and not your own.

Language Barrier

This is perhaps the commonest and the most inadvertent of barriers to communication. Using big words, too much of technical jargon or even using just the wrong language at the incorrect or inopportune time can lead to a loss or misinterpretation of communication. It may have sounded right in your head and to your ears as well, but if sounded gobbledygook to the others, the purpose is lost.

The problem: Say you are trying to explain a process to the newbies and end up using every technical word and industry jargon that you knew – your communication has failed if the newbie understood zilch. You have to, without sounding patronizing, explain things to someone in the simplest language they understand instead of the most complex that you do.

The solution: Simplify things for the other person to understand you, and understand it well. Think about it this way: if you are trying to explain something scientific to a child, you tone it down to their thinking capacity, without “dumbing” anything down in the process.[4]

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Emotional Barrier

Sometimes, we hesitate in opening our mouths, for fear of putting our foot in it! Other times, our emotional state is so fragile that we keep it and our lips zipped tightly together lest we explode. This is the time that our emotions become barriers to communication.[5]

The problem: Say you had a fight at home and are on a slow boil, muttering, in your head, about the injustice of it all. At this time, you have to give someone a dressing down over their work performance. You are likely to transfer at least part of your angst to the conversation then, and talk about unfairness in general, leaving the other person stymied about what you actually meant!

The solution: Remove your emotions and feelings to a personal space, and talk to the other person as you normally would. Treat any phobias or fears that you have and nip them in the bud so that they don’t become a problem. And remember, no one is perfect.

Cultural Barrier

Sometimes, being in an ever-shrinking world means that inadvertently, rules can make cultures clash and cultural clashes can turn into barriers to communication. The idea is to make your point across without hurting anyone’s cultural or religious sentiments.

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The problem: There are so many ways culture clashes can happen during communication and with cultural clashes; it’s not always about ethnicity. A non-smoker may have problems with smokers taking breaks; an older boss may have issues with younger staff using the Internet too much.

The solution: Communicate only what is necessary to get the point across – and eave your personal sentiments or feelings out of it. Try to be accommodative of the other’s viewpoint, and in case you still need to work it out, do it one to one, to avoid making a spectacle of the other person’s beliefs.[6]

Gender Barrier

Finally, it’s about Men from Mars and Women from Venus. Sometimes, men don’t understand women and women don’t get men – and this gender gap throws barriers in communication. Women tend to take conflict to their graves, literally, while men can move on instantly. Women rely on intuition, men on logic – so inherently, gender becomes a big block in successful communication.[7]

The problem: A male boss may inadvertently rub his female subordinates the wrong way with anti-feminism innuendoes, or even have problems with women taking too many family leaves. Similarly, women sometimes let their emotions get the better of them, something a male audience can’t relate to.

The solution: Talk to people like people – don’t think or classify them into genders and then talk accordingly. Don’t make comments or innuendos that are gender biased – you don’t have to come across as an MCP or as a bra-burning feminist either. Keep gender out of it.

And remember, the key to successful communication is simply being open, making eye contact and smiling intermittently. The battle is usually half won when you say what you mean in simple, straightforward words and keep your emotions out of it.

Reference

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