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10 Habits of Likable People That You Can Learn to Make More Friends

10 Habits of Likable People That You Can Learn to Make More Friends

Human beings are social animals. We want to be liked in order to survive in a community. Even the biggest introvert needs to be liked by at least one person, otherwise it’s a really lonely world out there for them.

If you find yourself not being included in work lunches or Friday evening plans, you may want to do something that you probably already do more often and with a conscious thought process to make yourself more likable. There are certain habits that people who are likable often have.

1. They are not a “know-it-all”.

Likable people don’t jump into conversations and act like they know everything. They listen to other people and ask appropriate questions. They tend to make people feel good about themselves. Others find themselves gravitating to them for advice or just small talk.

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2. They mind their own business.

Likable people are not a snob but they generally don’t give their input where it is not needed. It is quite annoying when you have a person in the office who eavesdrop on conversations and provides their opinions when they aren’t invited to do so. Likable people know when you are needed and when it is a good idea to keep a low profile.

3. They don’t hold grudges.

Likable people let things go especially when the argument is inconsequential. They have learned over time to be the bigger person which makes them win people’s admiration. Others like them because they have a clean slate with them.

They are not a pushover because they let others know what they have crossed the line but they also don’t hold it against them in the long run.

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4. They are patient.

Likable people give people opportunities, room to grow, and space to inherently make mistakes. They know that everything in life has a learning curve and they give people around them a chance to grow into themselves. This makes people trust them. They are often the one others come to for help around the office if something isn’t working.

5. They give genuine compliments.

Likable people notice things about others which means they are not self-centered. Often they smile to others genuinely because they are happy to see them.

When people remember these compliments, they remember these likable people.

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6. They notice the good things about people.

Sometimes, it is difficult to work with people who have different personalities especially when they are so different from our own.

Likable people are able to see the good in people and focus more on it than on the bad which has opened many opportunities for them. They are able to capitalize on the good things and people feel appreciated around them.

7. They don’t jump into conclusions.

There is nothing more annoying than someone who doesn’t know all the facts forming an inappropriate or unfair conclusion. Likable people take in the details and weigh all the facts. That way they don’t come off as unfair or biased.

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People respect and like them more because they take time to analyze issues before making premature conclusions.

8. They are genuine.

It is becoming harder to meet genuine people these days which makes a genuine person more likable. These people are not phony and they don’t entertain fake people.

A genuine person gives constructive criticism. Others often come to them when they have an issue to resolve because they know a genuine person truly care about them. Once these people have built a reputation for being genuine, anything they say or do for others comes from a good place. When others need help, they know they can count on the genuine ones to provide adequate support without taking all the credit.

9. They are generous.

A likable person is not stingy with good things. If they find a discount or deal, they share it with the people around. They are the type of person who brings snacks from the places they have been on vacation to the office. If there is something they can do to help someone, they ffind a way to extend themselves which makes people like them more. They help when needed without being overbearing.

10. They are a confidant.

Someone who can keep others’ secrets is very likable. They do not betray confidences and people trust them. They know how sensitive information can be and they don’t let the people who trust them down.

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Last Updated on March 5, 2021

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses

I talk a lot to myself. It helps me to keep my concentration on the activity on hand, makes me focus more on my studies, and gives me some pretty brilliant ideas while chattering to myself; more importantly, I produce better works. For example, right now, as I am typing, I am constantly mumbling to myself. Do you talk to yourself? Don’t get embarrassed admitting it because science has discovered that those who talk to themselves are actually geniuses… and not crazy!

Research Background

Psychologist-researcher Gary Lupyan conducted an experiment where 20 volunteers were shown objects, in a supermarket, and were asked to remember them. Half of them were told to repeat the objects, for example, banana, and the other half remained silent. In the end, the result shown that self-directed speech aided people to find the objects faster, by 50 to 100 milliseconds, compared to the silent ones.

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“I’ll often mutter to myself when searching for something in the refrigerator or the supermarket shelves,” said Gary Lupyan.

This personal experience actually made him conduct this experiment. Lupyan, together with another psychologist, Daniel Swigley, came up with the outcomes that those to talk to oneself are geniuses. Here are the reasons:

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It stimulates your memory

When you are talking to yourself, your sensory mechanism gets activated. It gets easier on your memory since you can visualize the word, and you can act accordingly.[1]

It helps stay focused

When you are saying it loud, you stay focused on your task,[2] and it helps you recognise that stuff immediately. Of course, this only helps if you know what the object you are searching looks like. For example, a banana is yellow in colour, and you know how a banana looks like. So when you are saying it loud, your brain immediately pictures the image on your mind. But if you don’t know what banana looks like, then there is no effect of saying it loud.

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It helps you clarify your thoughts

Every one of us tends to have various types of thoughts. Most make sense, while the others don’t. Suppose you are furious at someone and you feel like killing that person. Now for this issue you won’t run to a therapist, will you? No, what you do is lock yourself in a room and mutter to yourself. You are letting go off the anger by talking to yourself, the pros and cons of killing that person, and eventually you calm down. This is a silly thought that you have and are unable to share it with any other person. Psychologist Linda Sapadin said,[3]

“It helps you clarify your thoughts, tend to what’s important and firm up any decisions you are contemplating.”

Featured photo credit: Girl Using Laptop In Hotel Room/Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

Reference

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