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35 Things To Remember If You Have A 10-Year-Old Son

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35 Things To Remember If You Have A 10-Year-Old Son
  1. He know’s he’s about to navigate the treacherous waters of adolescence, puberty, and high school. And he knows he has to do it alone.
  2. He has no control over any of this, no road map to help him, and no idea how he’ll get through.
  3. He is terrified, but he can’t let on. Instead, he tries to act mature and work it out by himself.
  4. He desperately wants to feel good about himself, but he often thinks he’s not good enough.
  5. When he behaves as though he hates everyone, it’s because he hates himself.
  6. He uses bravado and bragging to cover his self-doubt. It’s his shield.
  7. Making small comments that show you notice his good points, and the efforts he puts in, will bring you closer.
  8. He values his friends’ opinions more highly than yours. He needs their approval to survive the school yard each day.
  9. But, he still needs time with you, and to know you’re always there for him.
  10. Just being there, without saying anything, is comforting to him. It lets him know you’ll always be there.
  11. He might not want to talk to you, or tell you anything, but he desperately needs you to understand him.
  12. Read his body language for signs of how he’s feeling. If you can’t tell from looking at him, try adopting the same posture. How does it make you feel?
  13. He hates doing chores, or being told to do things, but having responsibility improves his self-esteem.
  14. Treat him like the adult he’s desperate to become by asking instead of telling.
  15. Foster his independence by giving him a time frame in which to complete chores. This prevents the need for him to rebel when you demand he do things “now!”
  16. He wants to be the same as everyone else his age, but he also wants to stand out as being cool and valued.
  17. You’ll win points with him if you treat him like he really is cool and valued.
  18. He’s a complex mix of opposites because he’s trying to work himself out, but he’s not sure how to do that.
  19. He loves a good joke and a laugh, but he probably won’t like the jokes you tell.
  20. Try asking him what his favourite joke is, or listen in to the jokes his friends tell.
  21. Don’t ever let him catch you listening in. He’ll think you don’t trust him.
  22. He’s terrified of failing at anything, particularly in front of his friends.
  23. He craves admiration, especially from his peers. But he has a fine-tuned radar for any praise that’s not authentic.
  24. No matter how nonchalant he might act, he cherishes your approval.
  25. His world revolves around his peers and he might act like he hates his family.
  26. But his family are the one solid, reliable rock he can count on in a world of constant change.
  27. He craves freedom and independence so he can do what he wants, when he wants, the way he wants to.
  28. He’s also petrified of the responsibility it brings. Because he doesn’t yet know what he really wants or how to go about getting it.
  29. The solution is to give him independence gradually, with support and guidance. To be a great listener and sounding board, to encourage him to find solutions to his problems, and to show faith in his capability.
  30. He can be your best friend one minute and hate you the next.
  31. He can be your little boy when he’s scared and there’s no one else around.
  32. And a fearless risk-taker with his mates.
  33. Somewhere inside him, he’ll always be your little boy, he’s just struggling to express himself now that he’s growing up.
  34. He still needs your love, but he’ll never admit it or ask for it.
  35. Your job is to provide it. Every day.
  36. Featured photo credit: DSC_0113.jpg / DeduloPhotos via morguefile.com

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Last Updated on January 5, 2022

How to Help Your Child to Get Better Grades

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How to Help Your Child to Get Better Grades

Children are most likely to say that they want to just lounge around or rest for a while after spending hours listening to lecture after lecture from their teachers. There is nothing wrong with this if they had a rough day.

What’s disturbing, is if they deliberately stay away from schoolwork or procrastinate when it comes to reviewing for their tests or completing an important science project.

When it seems that it is becoming a habit for your child to put off school work, it’s time for you to step in and help your child develop good study habits to get better grades. It is important for you to emphasize to your child the importance of setting priorities early in life. Don’t wait for them to flunk their tests, or worse, fail in their subjects before you talk to them about it.

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You can help your children hurdle their tests with these 7 tips:

1. Help them set targets

Ask your child what they want to achieve for that particular school year. Tell them to set a specific goal or target. If they say, “I want to get better grades,” tell them to be more specific. It will be better if they say they want to get a GPA of 2.5 or higher. Having a definite target will make it easier for them to undertake a series of actions to achieve their goals, instead of just “shooting for the moon.”

2. Preparation is key

At the start of the school year, teachers provide an outline of a subject’s scope along with a reading list and other course requirements. Make sure that your child has all the materials they need for these course requirements. Having these materials on hand will make sure that your child will have no reason to procrastinate and give them the opportunity to study in advance.

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3. Teach them to mark important dates

You may opt to give them a small notebook where they can jot down important dates or a planner that has dates where they can list their schedule. Ask them to show this to you so you can give them “gentle reminders” to block off the whole week before the dates of an exam. During this week, advise your child to not schedule any social activity so they can concentrate on studying.

4. Schedule regular study time

Encourage your child to set aside at least two hours every day to go through their lessons. This will help them remember the lectures for the day and understand the concepts they were taught. They should be encouraged to spend more time on subjects or concepts that they do not understand.

5. Get help

Some kids find it hard to digest or absorb mathematical or scientific concepts. Ask your child if they are having difficulties with their subjects and if they would like to seek the help of a tutor. There is nothing wrong in asking for the assistance of a tutor who can explain complex subjects.

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6. Schedule some “downtime”

Your child needs to relax from time to time. During his break, you can consider bringing your child to the nearest mall or grocery store and get them a treat. You may play board games with them during their downtime. The idea is to take his mind off studying for a limited period of time.

7. Reward your child

If your child achieves their goals for the school year, you may give them a reward such as buying them the gadget they have always wanted or allowing them to vacation wherever they want. By doing this, you are telling your child that hard work does pay off.

Conclusion

You need to take the time to monitor your child’s performance in school. Your guidance is essential to helping your child realize the need to prioritize their school activities. As a parent, your ultimate goal is to expose your child to habits that will lay down the groundwork for their future success.

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Featured photo credit: Annie Spratt via unsplash.com

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