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15 Things People Who Grew Up With a Single Parent Understand

15 Things People Who Grew Up With a Single Parent Understand

In recent times, the numbers of single parent home keep soaring.  It is tough and intense living in the home where a single parent rules. In some ways it makes you stronger and more prepared for your adult life. This is why such situations can remain memorable and indelible with us forever. Here are some things persons who grew up with single parents understand so well.

1. You do not have any middle ground

You are not appeasing two sides to gain advantage and skimming something out to get a deal. You are stuck with one angle, one dimension, and one deal only. And that deal is handed by a single parent. You can’t hide behind the, “But I asked Dad and he said…” excuse when you are in a single parent home.

2. You have to learn fast

There is no room to be pampered or spoon-fed. You have to understand and quickly adapt to your responsibilities in the house, whether you are the middle child, first, or the last child. Every member of the family has their own unique role in the family that could include more responsibilities.

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3. You simply have to be responsible

Yes…if you wanted to you could do a lot of things to bother your parent. But you understand that there is so much on his/her table that you have to learn to appease and act responsibly instead.

4. You don’t have too many options

A single parent is a single parent. There is no good cop and bad cop in between. You have to deal with what you have and complain less. If your mom says “no”, her ruling is most likely to be final.

5. You have income to keep the family going

There is nothing to make any financial balance or to support the income of your single parent. To keep the family going, you have to adjust and know that the money is coming only from one source.

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6. You have to be concerned about their emotional stability

It is not about you who are around her. It is tough to handle things emotionally as a single parent. You have to know this and give them the opportunity to enjoy a piece of their life without you.

7. You end up feeling proud

After growing up with a single parent, you feel proud of the dynamic you have accomplished. Your achievements are shared because the hours you put in as a family are significant. Every celebration is that much more enjoyable after you grow up and look back on both your own and your parent’s accomplishments.

8. You have to be thankful

When you see the sacrifice your single parent is making, it means you have to show appreciation and acknowledge the effort they put in with you every single day. A little bit of thanks goes a long way.

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9. You are mocked for having a single parent

Somehow the news get to fly that you have a single parent, perhaps during those school events when only your dad or your mom showed up. Since the world knows you to have a single parent, it is possible that you were targeted for being different.

10. You are part of the decision making process

Somehow, you become involved in the way the home is run. You are quickly engaged in the important decisions of the day-to-day running of the house. In addition, you may even be asked for decorating advice!

11. You wished you had both parents

You see that there is a gap. And you really want that gap to be filled by someone. You may feel that things can be so overwhelming and you want someone to come into the scene and lighten the burden. Although you may not feel this everyday, it will happen.

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12. You experience that an open line of communication with your single parent

You are given many details and always being talked to, consulted and somehow you see your single parent in a way no other person can. Once you reach a certain level of understanding, it can be refreshing.

13. You are positive

It is disappointing to only have a single parent around. But you are positive that things will change no matter what. And possibly you want to be part of that change and want to help improve the situation. There is always a bright side!

14. You grow up to become protective of your single parent

Growing up doesn’t mean you shy away from what you are supposed to do in the home. Rather you take up the mantle to protect your single parent as they grow older. They raised you and it is your return duty to them!

15. You are tough

The intensity and the rigors of having a single parent makes you tough. If you grew up with a single parent, you are more resilient professionally and personally.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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