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If You Grew Up Italian, You Will Understand These 10 Things

If You Grew Up Italian, You Will Understand These 10 Things

Being Italian is like sitting at the cool kid’s table in the cafeteria. Everyone wants to join. We love to eat. We love to drink. We’ve produced some of the world’s greatest painters, sculptors, and composers. Basically, we’re just all that is awesome. My memories of growing up Italian are a rich tapestry woven out of a lot of love, a lot of laughter, and a lot of lasagna. Here are 10 things you can only appreciate if you grew up Italian.

1. We always ask our guests one question before they’ve even taken off their coats: “Have you eaten?”

It’s a reflex. If we don’t have “something in the house” to offer, whether a pizza or a plate of cookies, we’re being inhospitable. Heaven forbid we make a bruta figura (bad impression).

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2. We panic when cleaning up after a party and discover there are no leftovers

This might sound counter intuitive to the non-Italian. In other cultures, no leftovers is a sign that you made delicious food. In the Italian mindset, no leftovers means the possibility that someone went home hungry because there wasn’t enough for seconds (or thirds). Leftovers means we’ve overcompensated and made sure that there would be more than enough, and everyone’s eaten their fill and gone home happy. When cooking for a party Italian-style, there’s one rule: If the serving plates are empty when it’s over, you’re not doing it right.

3. We consider Spaghetti-Os a banned substance

As a child, I saw all of my friends eating Spaghetti-Os. I thought this was something right out of the space food pantry at NASA. Spaghetti out of a can? How precisely did that work? So I asked my parents why we never bought it. My dad replied, “Only Americans eat that stuff.” In my household growing up, this phrase, roughly translated, meant “It’s not real food.” No further questions.

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4. We argue over “what to bring” to a friend’s house for dinner

Wine? Cookies? Cake? Something more substantial? They’re offering us their hospitality, so the least we can do is contribute to the table. If a friend says that nothing is needed, we err on the side of caution by bringing a homemade dish with wine to complement it!

5. We plan holiday meals at least a month in advance

I still have memories of sitting at the dining-room table with a Thanksgiving turkey hangover, and my grandmother would pull out her notepad and say: “Okay, let’s talk about Christmas.” Eisenhower put less thought into his D-Day tactics than Italians put into a holiday meal. If you can’t deal with that, leave the table. Oh, and speaking of food… (Because you know, it’s not like I’ve talked about food at all yet)…

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6. We turn Christmas Eve into a SeaWorld exhibition

If you’re not only Italian, but Italian and Catholic, you know exactly what I’m talking about: seven fish on Christmas Eve. We do this for three reasons. The first reason is that seven is a biblical number, representing the seven sacraments. Second, at one point in history Catholics had to abstain from eating meat on Christmas Eve. Finally, we’re just nuts for good food and tough challenges! This is usually the explanation I offer as the most plausible of the three.

7. We never need an excuse to open a bottle of wine

Case-in-point: my family still has a home video somewhere in which they’re opening a bottle of wine to toast my first bath. Everything is cause for celebration in an Italian family, and what’s a party without wine?

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8. We have an incredibly loose definition of the word appetizer

Have you ever seen that John Pinette routine about the Italian restaurant?
“Luigi, can we order?”
“No, first we gonna bring out some food.”
“Okay then, you’re not scarin’ me!” The game is on! Not that I want to give anyone the idea that Italians are preoccupied with food, or anything, because that would be crazy. When we talk about appetizers, it is food before the food but not necessarily a lighter, smaller dish.

9. We value the versatility of pastina

Pastina is basically the culinary version of that blouse in your closet that goes with everything. You can dress it up or dress it down. Sauce, butter, chicken, veggies—you name it, pastina works with it. We aren’t afraid of serving several types at one meal!

10. We can give everyone lessons on how to throw a party

When my grandmother passed away last month, we invited everyone who came to the burial out to lunch (at an Italian restaurant, because of course). Several courses and a few glasses of wine later, I forgot for a few minutes that we’d just buried my last grandparent, and that’s how Grandma would have wanted it. It’s not just about the food; it’s about the fellowship. Food is just the link that brings everyone around the table to share their lives together.

Featured photo credit: Spaghetti Dinner via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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