Advertising
Advertising

If You Grew Up Italian, You Will Understand These 10 Things

If You Grew Up Italian, You Will Understand These 10 Things

Being Italian is like sitting at the cool kid’s table in the cafeteria. Everyone wants to join. We love to eat. We love to drink. We’ve produced some of the world’s greatest painters, sculptors, and composers. Basically, we’re just all that is awesome. My memories of growing up Italian are a rich tapestry woven out of a lot of love, a lot of laughter, and a lot of lasagna. Here are 10 things you can only appreciate if you grew up Italian.

1. We always ask our guests one question before they’ve even taken off their coats: “Have you eaten?”

It’s a reflex. If we don’t have “something in the house” to offer, whether a pizza or a plate of cookies, we’re being inhospitable. Heaven forbid we make a bruta figura (bad impression).

Advertising

2. We panic when cleaning up after a party and discover there are no leftovers

This might sound counter intuitive to the non-Italian. In other cultures, no leftovers is a sign that you made delicious food. In the Italian mindset, no leftovers means the possibility that someone went home hungry because there wasn’t enough for seconds (or thirds). Leftovers means we’ve overcompensated and made sure that there would be more than enough, and everyone’s eaten their fill and gone home happy. When cooking for a party Italian-style, there’s one rule: If the serving plates are empty when it’s over, you’re not doing it right.

3. We consider Spaghetti-Os a banned substance

As a child, I saw all of my friends eating Spaghetti-Os. I thought this was something right out of the space food pantry at NASA. Spaghetti out of a can? How precisely did that work? So I asked my parents why we never bought it. My dad replied, “Only Americans eat that stuff.” In my household growing up, this phrase, roughly translated, meant “It’s not real food.” No further questions.

Advertising

4. We argue over “what to bring” to a friend’s house for dinner

Wine? Cookies? Cake? Something more substantial? They’re offering us their hospitality, so the least we can do is contribute to the table. If a friend says that nothing is needed, we err on the side of caution by bringing a homemade dish with wine to complement it!

5. We plan holiday meals at least a month in advance

I still have memories of sitting at the dining-room table with a Thanksgiving turkey hangover, and my grandmother would pull out her notepad and say: “Okay, let’s talk about Christmas.” Eisenhower put less thought into his D-Day tactics than Italians put into a holiday meal. If you can’t deal with that, leave the table. Oh, and speaking of food… (Because you know, it’s not like I’ve talked about food at all yet)…

Advertising

6. We turn Christmas Eve into a SeaWorld exhibition

If you’re not only Italian, but Italian and Catholic, you know exactly what I’m talking about: seven fish on Christmas Eve. We do this for three reasons. The first reason is that seven is a biblical number, representing the seven sacraments. Second, at one point in history Catholics had to abstain from eating meat on Christmas Eve. Finally, we’re just nuts for good food and tough challenges! This is usually the explanation I offer as the most plausible of the three.

7. We never need an excuse to open a bottle of wine

Case-in-point: my family still has a home video somewhere in which they’re opening a bottle of wine to toast my first bath. Everything is cause for celebration in an Italian family, and what’s a party without wine?

Advertising

8. We have an incredibly loose definition of the word appetizer

Have you ever seen that John Pinette routine about the Italian restaurant?
“Luigi, can we order?”
“No, first we gonna bring out some food.”
“Okay then, you’re not scarin’ me!” The game is on! Not that I want to give anyone the idea that Italians are preoccupied with food, or anything, because that would be crazy. When we talk about appetizers, it is food before the food but not necessarily a lighter, smaller dish.

9. We value the versatility of pastina

Pastina is basically the culinary version of that blouse in your closet that goes with everything. You can dress it up or dress it down. Sauce, butter, chicken, veggies—you name it, pastina works with it. We aren’t afraid of serving several types at one meal!

10. We can give everyone lessons on how to throw a party

When my grandmother passed away last month, we invited everyone who came to the burial out to lunch (at an Italian restaurant, because of course). Several courses and a few glasses of wine later, I forgot for a few minutes that we’d just buried my last grandparent, and that’s how Grandma would have wanted it. It’s not just about the food; it’s about the fellowship. Food is just the link that brings everyone around the table to share their lives together.

Featured photo credit: Spaghetti Dinner via pixabay.com

More by this author

picture of colorful blue plastic spoons 6 Simple Life Lessons To Be Learned From Spoon Theory image of a girl relaxing in a hotel reading magazines Five Ways Reading Improves Your Life 10 Things Only Book Nerds Can Appreciate Book cover of Emma (1815) by Jane Austen 10 Quotes From Jane Austen’s Emma That Can Teach Us About Life image of a girl working on a Macbook 5 Tips I’ve Learned About Being A Successful Freelancer

Trending in Communication

1 7 Ways To Deal With Negative People 2 How to Talk to Strangers Without Feeling Awkward 3 What Are Interpersonal Skills? Master Them for Better Relationships 4 How To Stop Negative Thoughts from Killing Your Confidence 5 This 4-Year Old Girl’s Explanation On the Problem with New Year’s Resolutions Is Everything You Need

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

Advertising

In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

Advertising

But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

Advertising

5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

Advertising

You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

Read Next