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10 Things You Learn Growing Up As the Eldest Sibling

10 Things You Learn Growing Up As the Eldest Sibling

Are you the eldest sibling in your family? Being the eldest sibling comes with both difficult responsibilities and entertaining advantages, from babysitting for free to having a pass to be as bossy as you like.

Check out 10 funny things you learn growing up as the eldest sibling.

1. You were raised with strict rules.

You were the first child your parents raised, so they wanted to make sure they got it right. You were forced to join clubs, you had early curfews and your parents stressed over every cut and bruise you got. Your parents had relaxed by the time your siblings came along, so their youth was much easier.

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2. All of your toys were brand new.

There were upsides to being the eldest siblings, such as being the only sibling to get brand new toys. You were given brand new clothes, toys and game systems—and when you grew bored of them, they were passed onto your younger siblings. They said it wasn’t fair, but you think you deserved it as a reward for the strict parenting you went through.

3. You hated having to sit at the kids’ table.

When it came to Thanksgiving or family events you were always seated at the kids table, and you were always the oldest one there. You didn’t feel quite right sitting at the kids’ table—the chairs were way too small for you, but the adult’s table looked boring to you as well.

4. You are experienced in being bossy.

If your siblings did something bad, you were just as likely to get shouted at as they were for not stopping them. So whenever your younger siblings tried to draw on the walls or cut their own hair, you shouted at them. Then you got into trouble for making them cry.

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5. Staying out late was more of a problem for you than your siblings.

Due to your parent’s strict rules, you spent your teenage years abiding by a very early curfew. You always made sure you were home in time, whereas your siblings regularly arrived home in the early hours of the morning—and your parents never said anything.

6. You fear losing games to your younger siblings.

After years of being the oldest and the bossiest, you fear losing any games to your younger siblings. From soccer to Jenga, you always have to win.

7. You were a cheap babysitter.

You grew up with a paid babysitter looking after you when your parents went out, but they realized you were a much cheaper alternative for your younger siblings. So you became a babysitter every Friday night, and you wonder why you were paid so little—that is, if you were paid at all.

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8. You can never decide if you want to be the cool one or the responsible one.

You like the idea of drinking with your younger siblings, but if they have too many or puff on a cigarette, you immediately start worrying. It’s a tough struggle wanting to look after your siblings while also wanting to be their best friend.

9. You’re used to taking the blame.

You were supposed to “set a good example” for your siblings, so if they did something wrong, you both got in trouble instead of just them. Even if your sibling was 6 and you were 7.

10. You’re very proud of your siblings.

Despite the added responsibilities, you loved helping raise and shape your younger siblings. You are proud of everything they have achieved, and know you will always be there for your younger siblings.

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What did you think of this list? Share this list with any eldest siblings you know who you know could relate!

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Amy Johnson

Freelance writer, editor and social media manager.

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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