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Is Time Your Friend or Your Enemy?

Is Time Your Friend or Your Enemy?

Western society promotes being busy at all times and at all costs. As a result, it seems that we are always rushing. We live by the calendar and we are run by the clock. We learn early on in life that you had better be on time for things or bad stuff will happen. Be late to turn in your papers and your grade gets lowered. Be late to pay your bills and you get stuck with a penalty. Be late to finish your work and you may be out of a job.

As a result many people conclude that time is their enemy. It must be battled and beaten. But there is no permanence in any victory over time — the clock gets reset tomorrow and the calendar at the first of the month, or at the very latest at the first of the year.

Consider the popular phrase, “Life is too short to __________.” Here are some beauties you hear all the time:

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  • Life is too short to hold on to regret.
  • Life is too short to work at a job you hate.
  • Life is too short to play small.
  • Life is too short to {insert your favorite here}.

Aphorisms like these certainly imply that time is your enemy. However, time is not the reason why you ought to give up regret, revamp your career, or up your game. Even the shortness of life is not the reason. There is an assumption going on here that entirely misses where the real problem lies.

A short life and limited time would be a blessing in these circumstances. After all, the less time one spends in some undesired state, the better. A short amount of regret? Sounds great. A short time at a crummy job? Excellent. A short time of cowering in the corner? What could be better?

So let me give you a different way to look at things:

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“Life is too long to __________.”

When you approach your problems and challenges from this standpoint, time is not only not your enemy, it is your best friend. It is because of the abundance of time and life that you are motivated to seek change and transformation. After all, since you are going to be here for some time, don’t you want to make the best of it?

When you have a habit or circumstance that needs fixing, imagine what your life would be like if you delayed taking action to fix it. See yourself a year from now with this problem still hanging around. What impact has it had on you? How has it hurt your relationships? What is it doing to you at work? What cost have you paid to your health?

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Now take it out to five years. What have you lost? What have you suffered? What have the people close to you been forced to pay?

Time keeps marching on. It is now ten years with your unresolved problem. What has happened to your faith and hope? How insurmountable does this problem now look? How much weaker are you now than when this problem first arose?

We are far from the end of the calendar. Twenty years go by. Can you even remember life without your problem? Can you muster the energy to even care anymore? Are you locked in to a state of resignation?

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When you consider the impact that leaving something unresolved for a long period of time can heap upon you, you start to realize the value of taking action in this moment. Time isn’t out to hurt you here. It is giving you an opportunity. Some resolutions will require hours or days, some weeks or months. But time is there for you. Take what you need.

Time has no agenda. It will allow you whatever you need. This is not to say that some problems don’t have deadlines. But it is not time that imposes such restrictions. Time will either offer you volume or impetus. It is on your side.

Waiting for the perfect moment is a fool’s errand. You don’t have to be very experienced in life to know the truth of that. Partner with time to get the most out of life. Time is waiting for you.

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Last Updated on March 31, 2020

How To Break the Procrastination Cycle

How To Break the Procrastination Cycle

How often do you find yourself procrastinating? Do you wish you could procrastinate less? We all know how debilitating procrastination can make us feel, and it seems to be a challenge we all share. Procrastination is one of the biggest hindrances to moving forward and doing the things that we want to in life.

There are many reasons why you might be procrastinating, and sometimes, it is really difficult to pinpoint why. You might be procrastinating because of something related to the past, present, or future (they are all intertwined), or it could be as simple as biological factors. Whatever the reason, most of us follow a cycle when we procrastinate, from the moment we decide to do something to actually getting it done, or in this case, not getting it done.

The Vicious Procrastination Cycle

For some reason, it helps to understand that we all go through the same thing, even though we often feel like the only person in the world who struggles with this. Do you resonate with the cycle below?

1. Feeling Eager and Energized

This is when you commit to taking a new action or getting something done. You are feeling confident and optimistic that, this time round, you will do it!

2. Apprehension Starts to Come Up

The beginning stages of optimism are starting to fade. There is still time, but you haven’t done anything yet, and you start to feel uneasy. You realize that you actually have to do something to get it done, and that good intentions are not enough.

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3. Still No Action

More time has passed. You still haven’t taken any action and probably have a lot of excuses why. You start to panic a little and wish you had started sooner. Your panic starts to turn into frustration and perhaps even irritability.

4. Flicker of Hope Left

You can still make it; there is a little time left and you ponder how you are going to get it done. The rush you get from leaving your task until the last minute gives you a flicker of hope. There is still time; you can do this!

5. Fading Quickly

Your hope starts to quickly fade as you try desperately to understand why you just can’t do this. You may feel desperate and have thoughts like, “What is wrong with me?” and “Why do I ALWAYS do this?” You feel discouraged, or perhaps angry and resentful at yourself.

6. Vow to Yourself

Once the feeling of anger or disappointment disappears, you most likely swear to yourself that this will never happen again; that this was the last time and next time will be different.

Does this sound like you? Is the next time different? I understand the devastating effect that procrastination has on many lives, and for some, it is a really serious problem. You also have, on the other hand, those who procrastinate but it doesn’t affect them in any way. You know whether it is affecting you or not and whether it undermines your results.

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How to Break the Procrastination Cycle

Unless you break the cycle, you will keep reinforcing it!

To break the cycle, you need to change the sequence of events. Here is my suggestion on how you can effectively break the vicious cycle you are in!

1. Feeling Eager and Energized

This is when you commit to taking a new action or getting something done. You are feeling confident and optimistic that, this time round, you will do it! The first stage is always the same.

2. Plan

Thinking alone will not help; you need to plan your actions. I always put my deadlines one or two days in advance because you know Murphy’s Law! Take into consideration everything that you need to do, how long it will take you, and what you will need to get it done, then plan the individual steps.

3. Resistance

Just because you planned doesn’t mean that this time is guaranteed to be different. You will most likely still feel the resistance so expect this. This stage is key to identifying why you are procrastinating, so when you feel the resistance, try to identify it immediately.

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What is causing you to hesitate in this moment? What do you feel?  Write them down if it helps.

4. Confront Those Feelings

Once you have identified what could possibly be holding you back, for example, fear of failure, lack of motivation, etc. You need to work on lessening the resistance.

Ask yourself, “What do I need to do to move forward? What would make it easier?” If you find that you fear something, overcoming that fear is not something that will happen overnight — keep this in mind.

5. Put Results Before Comfort

You need to keep moving forward and put results before comfort. Take action, even if it is only for 10 minutes. The key is to break the cycle and not reinforce it. You have more control that you think.

6. Repeat

Repeat steps 3-5 until you achieve what you first set out to do.

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Final Thoughts

Change doesn’t happen overnight, and if you have some deeper underlying reasons why you procrastinate, it may take longer to finally break the cycle.

If procrastination is holding you back in life, it is better to deal with it now than to deal with the negative consequences later on. It is not a question of comfort anymore; it is a question of results. What is more important to you?

Learn more about how to stop procrastinating here: What Is Procrastination and How to Stop It (The Complete Guide)

Featured photo credit: Luke Chesser via unsplash.com

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