Advertising
Advertising

How to Prepare for the First Time at Anything

How to Prepare for the First Time at Anything

    The first time for everything is always the most exciting one. Whether it is your first day in a new job or going on a first date, you will always remember those “first” times.

    Not only is there a lot of excitement loaded in those events, but there is also a fear of some sort included. You may be thinking about whether or not you are able to perform well enough, or what the other person (or persons) think of you if you fail.

    Instead of having thoughts like that, what if you turned the first time into a very positive and exciting event?

    Advertising

    Here are some steps to make you feel better when entering new situations that you feel anxious about, allowing you to prepare better.

    1. Ditch the perfection

    On very rare occasions can you manage to do something perfectly the first time you do it, so when you do something for the first time, it is time to ditch the notion of perfection.

    I remember the first time I drove a car in traffic after getting my driver’s license. I was very nervous and I was overwhelmed by the traffic — my driving style showed that I wasn’t a very confident driver. Now I’m much more experienced as a driver. Although I still don’t consider myself a perfect one, I’m much more confident behind the wheel than what I was when I started.

    In general, it is useless to strive for perfection when you do something for the first time. You are setting the bar too high and you just feel bad when you are not able to meet the level you have set.

    Advertising

    Also, perfection is just another way to procrastinate, so trying to be perfect is just a waste of time. You want to pursue excellence instead.

    2. Forget what others think

    In order to decrease the stress you feel about your first time, just forget what others are thinking of you.

    First, many people don’t really care that much if you happen to fail at something. If you are open about your inexperience, they are most likely to forgive your inability to perform well.

    Second, remember that others have also started from “zero” as well (driving a car, giving a public speech, going out for a date, etc.).

    Advertising

    Third, focus on your own performance — not on others. For instance, if you’re going to be running in your first marathon ever your goal is just to pass the finish line, not to run a new world record.

    3. The time you spend doesn’t matter

    One common characteristic of doing something for the first time is that it is most likely to be more time-consuming than subsequent times. If you are inexperienced, the first few times you are just going to be learning anyway — and hopefully getting better in the process.

    Just take your time and try to learn as much as possible as you go. You will realize that the second time is much easier, since you already have some experience in your pocket.

    4. Plan and prepare

    If possible, try to plan and prepare as much as possible before doing something new. This way you will gain more self-confidence, and by planning and preparing you actually may have a bit more control of things.

    Advertising

    But you don’t always have that sense of control. For instance, if you are going out on a first date, you cannot plan every possible topic to talk about in advance — nor is it reasonable to do that.

    On the other hand, if you are going to take a certification test related to your profession, you can study and prepare so that you can reach a whole different level when you take the exam.

    5. Prepare for the second time

    Once you have gone through your “first time experience”, you’ll have broken the biggest barrier of all. The excitement and fear is most likely gone and the next time won’t be that scary anymore.

    To make the next time even a smoother experience, do these two things during your first time:

    •  Take notes. It never hurts to write things down as you go. These notes can help you to feel more confident and you can go them through when preparing for the second time
    •  Run through a checklist. Create a checklist, so that you can prepare even better for the next time. For example, to prepare yourself to give a presentation, write down a checklist to go through before the actual event. This way you can make sure that all the necessary requirements are met before the presentation begins.

    Conclusion

    You’ll never be fully prepared for the first time at everything, but if you use the tips above the next time you face something new you’ll have a much better chance to enjoy the experience. And then you’ll want to do it again.

    Photo credit: Young Man Holding a Clock via Shutterstock)

    More by this author

    Timo Kiander

    Productivity Author and Founder of Productive Superdad

    What Is FOMO (And How to Get Over It) Do You Do This Common Mistake When You Start Working on Your Tasks? 9 Valuable Lessons Learned After Writing My First Book How to Create a To-Do List that Makes You Smile Agreeing on Deadlines With Yourself Just Doesn’t Work: Here’s What Does

    Trending in Productivity

    1 What Is the Purpose of Life and What Should You Live For? 2 Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes 3 10 Things High Achievers Do to Attain Greatness 4 11 Meeting Scheduler Apps to Boost Your Productivity 5 How to Build Self Discipline to Excel in Life

    Read Next

    Advertising
    Advertising
    Advertising

    Last Updated on October 16, 2019

    Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

    Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

    Do you like making mistakes?

    I certainly don’t.

    Making mistakes is inevitable. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could be at ease with them?

    Perhaps there is a way to think of them differently and see their benefits.

    Advertising

    Why Mistakes Feel Dangerous

    Mistakes often feel dangerous. Throughout human history, our errors have often been treated as dangerous for a variety of reasons:

    • Our vulnerability. We have limited and fragile support systems. When those systems fail, people often lose their lives.
    • Real dangers. Nature can be dangerous, and making mistakes can put us at the mercy of nature and its animal residents seeking a meal.
    • Ignorance. Many cultures scapegoats someone whenever there is a failure of some kind. Scapegoating can be serious and deadly.
    • Order. Many societies punish those who do not conform to the prevailing orthodoxy and treat difference and non-conformity as a mistake. Even our brains flash an error message whenever we go against prevailing social norms.

    We have a history of handling mistakes and failure in an unpleasant way. Since each of us carries our human history with us, it can be a challenge to overcome the fear of making mistakes.

    If we can embrace the reality of mistakes, we can free ourselves to be more creative in our lives and dig up some interesting insights.

    Why We Can’t Avoid Making Mistakes

    Many people operate under the notion that making mistakes is an aberration, a mistake if you will. You can call it perfectionism but it is a more substantial problem. It is really a demand for order and continuity.

    Advertising

    When we think we can eliminate mistakes, we are often working from a perspective that sees the world as a fixed place. The world, however, is not so obliging. Like it or not, the world, and everything in it, is constantly changing.

    Change is more constant and pervasive than we can see with our own eyes which is why we often miss it. Our bodies are constantly changing. The natural conditions of the earth change constantly as well. Everything, including economic and cultural systems have life cycles. Everything is in a constant state of flux.

    We cannot see all of the changes going on around us since rates of change vary. Unfortunately, when we try to create a feeling of certainty and solidity in our lives or operate from the illusion of stability and order, we are fighting reality and our natural evolution which is built on adapting to change.

    It is better to continually bend into this reality rather than fight every change we experience. Fighting it can cause us to make more mistakes. Finding the benefits in change can be useful and help us minimize unnecessary mistakes.

    Advertising

    Lessons Learned from Making Mistakes

    Life has so many uncertainties and variables that mistakes are inevitable. Fortunately, there are many things you can learn from making mistakes.

    Here is a list of ways to harness the mistakes you make for your benefit.

    1. Point us to something we did not know.
    2. Reveal a nuance we missed.
    3. Deepen our knowledge.
    4. Tell us something about our skill levels.
    5. Help us see what matters and what does not.
    6. Inform us more about our values.
    7. Teach us more about others.
    8. Let us recognize changing circumstances.
    9. Show us when someone else has changed.
    10. Keep us connected to what works and what doesn’t work.
    11. Remind us of our humanity.
    12. Spur us to want to better work which helps us all.
    13. Promote compassion for ourselves and others.
    14. Teach us to value forgiveness.
    15. Help us to pace ourselves better.
    16. Invite us to better choices.
    17. Can teach us how to experiment.
    18. Can reveal a new insight.
    19. Can suggest new options we had not considered.
    20. Can serve as a warning.
    21. Show us hidden fault lines in our lives which can lead us to more productive arrangements.
    22. Point out structural problems in our lives.
    23. Prompt us to learn more about ourselves.
    24. Remind us how we are like others.
    25. Make us more humble.
    26. Help us rectify injustices in our lives.
    27. Show us where to create more balance in our lives.
    28. Tell us when the time to move on has occurred.
    29. Reveal where our passion is and where it is not.
    30. Expose our true feelings.
    31. Bring out problems in a relationship.
    32. Can be a red flag for our misjudgments.
    33. Point us in a more creative direction.
    34. Show us when we are not listening.
    35. Wake us up to our authentic selves.
    36. Can create distance with someone else.
    37. Slow us down when we need to.
    38. Can hasten change.
    39. Reveal our blind spots.
    40. Are the invisible made visible.

    Reframe Reality to Handle Mistakes More Easily

    The secret to handling mistakes is to:

    • Expect them as part of the process of growth and development.
    • Have an experimental mindset.
    • Think in evolutional rather than fixed terms.

    When we accept change as the natural structure of the world, our vulnerability and humanness lets us work with the ebb and flow of life.

    Advertising

    When we recognize the inevitability of mistakes as part of the ongoing experiment which life is, then we can relax more. In doing so we may make fewer of them.

    It also helps to keep in mind that trial and error is an organic natural way of living. It is how we have evolved over time. It is better to be with our natural evolution than to fight it and make life harder.

    When we adopt an evolutional mindset and see ourselves as part of the ongoing human experiment, we can appreciate that all that has been built up over time which includes the many mistakes our ancestors have made over thousands of years. Each one of us today is a part of that human tradition of learning and experimenting,

    Mistakes are part of the trial and error, experimental nature of life. The more you adopt the experimental, evolutional frame, the easier it becomes to handle mistakes.

    Handling mistakes well can help you relax and enjoy all aspects of life more.

    More About Success and Failures

    Featured photo credit: Sarah Kilian via unsplash.com

    Read Next