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How Small Talk Can Lead You To Great Success

How Small Talk Can Lead You To Great Success

It is not what you know, it’s who you know. Take these words from the author of one of the world’s greatest bestsellers of all time, Dale Carnegie. He became famous for his How to Win Friends and Influence People in 1936. Many goals can be attained by communicating with other people and learning just how to talk to people can lead you to great success.

The art of talking is as much about listening as speaking out loud. You cannot know a person until you talk with them and get to know them at a deeper level. Small talk also serves as a portal to let others see you as well. In the world of entrepreneurship, you must surround yourself with the right people who can help you grow and expand your horizons. When you have the right people within your grasp, you have a connection that will lead you closer to success.

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Here are three top tips that can help your small talk lead to great success.

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Be Spontaneous

It can be hard to start a conversation with a stranger. But it’s often even harder to keep the ball rolling. Listen to whomever you are talking to and compliment what they say. The conversation will likely continue in an amiable way. Being interested in whatever the person is talking about — regardless of whether or not you really are — will get you a long way towards gearing the conversation the way you want it to. Also, try never to settle one on one-line answers like a “yes” or a “no”. This will definitely lead you to trouble as the other person might feel that you are either uninterested or not worth the time to talk to. Remember, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know. Be interested in them – not just you!

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Have a story or two ready.

It might sound too rehearsed but having something to share with someone that you already thought of before will help you have successful small talks. Having a number of things to share will also give you a chance to choose as to which might be more of a “common ground” story with the person you’re talking to. If you are nervous about meeting up with a certain person, having a story ready might help calm your nerves. Try and gear the story you pick to the topic at hand, such as saying something like, “You know, that reminds me of the time that….” After all, communication is all about sharing something in common. And when you have that common thing that you can talk about, then it wouldn’t be hard for you to have a small talk. You will be able to establish a closer bond and later on a connection that you can use for your success. Remember, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know.

Have a clear objective.

Seriously, why are you talking to this person? Why do you want to talk with them at all? Do they have something you need for your business? Do they know people that are influential and can help you accomplish something? What is your objective? Perhaps you want to break the ice with someone and be friends with them. But what is your CLEAR objective? Make it clear through your chat that this relationship can somehow be beneficial for both of you. Having a clear objective will not only do away with gray areas of small talk but will also make the small talk a foundation for future success for an endeavor. Remember, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know.

Small talks do not need to be a frantic approach to save yourself in a blind spot or just because you don’t have a choice. Instead, it can be a means for you to be recognized and to open up new choices for you to achieve success. Don’t underestimate the value of small talks. Don’t choose between silence and success.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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