Advertising
Advertising

How Small Talk Can Lead You To Great Success

How Small Talk Can Lead You To Great Success

It is not what you know, it’s who you know. Take these words from the author of one of the world’s greatest bestsellers of all time, Dale Carnegie. He became famous for his How to Win Friends and Influence People in 1936. Many goals can be attained by communicating with other people and learning just how to talk to people can lead you to great success.

The art of talking is as much about listening as speaking out loud. You cannot know a person until you talk with them and get to know them at a deeper level. Small talk also serves as a portal to let others see you as well. In the world of entrepreneurship, you must surround yourself with the right people who can help you grow and expand your horizons. When you have the right people within your grasp, you have a connection that will lead you closer to success.

Advertising

Here are three top tips that can help your small talk lead to great success.

Advertising

Be Spontaneous

It can be hard to start a conversation with a stranger. But it’s often even harder to keep the ball rolling. Listen to whomever you are talking to and compliment what they say. The conversation will likely continue in an amiable way. Being interested in whatever the person is talking about — regardless of whether or not you really are — will get you a long way towards gearing the conversation the way you want it to. Also, try never to settle one on one-line answers like a “yes” or a “no”. This will definitely lead you to trouble as the other person might feel that you are either uninterested or not worth the time to talk to. Remember, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know. Be interested in them – not just you!

Advertising

Have a story or two ready.

It might sound too rehearsed but having something to share with someone that you already thought of before will help you have successful small talks. Having a number of things to share will also give you a chance to choose as to which might be more of a “common ground” story with the person you’re talking to. If you are nervous about meeting up with a certain person, having a story ready might help calm your nerves. Try and gear the story you pick to the topic at hand, such as saying something like, “You know, that reminds me of the time that….” After all, communication is all about sharing something in common. And when you have that common thing that you can talk about, then it wouldn’t be hard for you to have a small talk. You will be able to establish a closer bond and later on a connection that you can use for your success. Remember, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know.

Have a clear objective.

Seriously, why are you talking to this person? Why do you want to talk with them at all? Do they have something you need for your business? Do they know people that are influential and can help you accomplish something? What is your objective? Perhaps you want to break the ice with someone and be friends with them. But what is your CLEAR objective? Make it clear through your chat that this relationship can somehow be beneficial for both of you. Having a clear objective will not only do away with gray areas of small talk but will also make the small talk a foundation for future success for an endeavor. Remember, it’s not what you know, it’s who you know.

Small talks do not need to be a frantic approach to save yourself in a blind spot or just because you don’t have a choice. Instead, it can be a means for you to be recognized and to open up new choices for you to achieve success. Don’t underestimate the value of small talks. Don’t choose between silence and success.

Advertising

More by this author

12 Things Only a Graduate Student Would Understand 10 Little Things Happy Couples Remember To Do Every Day Sometimes dreams can make you fall. Hold on or let go. You Should Never Turn Your Dreams Into Reality If… Small talk and dancing. How Small Talk Can Lead You To Great Success

Trending in Productivity

1 8 Ways to Train Your Brain to Learn Faster and Remember More 2 How Exercising Makes You More Productive 3 10 Practical Ways to Drastically Improve Your Time Management Skills 4 15 Highly Successful People Who Failed On Their Way To Success 5 How to Memorize More and Faster Than Other People

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on September 20, 2018

8 Ways to Train Your Brain to Learn Faster and Remember More

8 Ways to Train Your Brain to Learn Faster and Remember More

You go to the gym to train your muscles. You run outside or go for hikes to train your endurance. Or, maybe you do neither of those, but still wish you exercised more.

Well, here is how to train one of the most important parts of your body: your brain.

When you train your brain, you will:

  • Avoid embarrassing situations. You remember his face, but what was his name?
  • Be a faster learner in all sorts of different skills. No problem for you to pick up a new language or new management skill.
  • Avoid diseases that hit as you get older. Alzheimer’s will not be affecting you.

So how to train your brain and improve your cognitive skills?

1. Work your memory

Twyla Tharp, a NYC-based renowned choreographer has come up with the following memory workout:

When she watches one of her performances, she tries to remember the first twelve to fourteen corrections she wants to discuss with her cast without writing them down.

If you think this is anything less than a feat, then think again. In her book The Creative Habit she says that most people cannot remember more than three.

The practice of both remembering events or things and then discussing them with others has actually been supported by brain fitness studies.

Memory activities that engage all levels of brain operation—receiving, remembering and thinking—help to improve the function of the brain.

Advertising

Now, you may not have dancers to correct, but you may be required to give feedback on a presentation, or your friends may ask you what interesting things you saw at the museum. These are great opportunities to practically train your brain by flexing your memory muscles.

What is the simplest way to help yourself remember what you see? Repetition.

For example, say you just met someone new:

“Hi, my name is George”

Don’t just respond with, “Nice to meet you”. Instead, say, “Nice to meet you George.”

Got it? Good.

2. Do something different repeatedly

By actually doing something new over and over again, your brain wires new pathways that help you do this new thing better and faster.

Think back to when you were three years old. You surely were strong enough to hold a knife and a fork just fine. Yet, when you were eating all by yourself, you were creating a mess.

It was not a matter of strength, you see. It was a matter of cultivating more and better neural pathways that would help you eat by yourself just like an adult does.

Advertising

And guess what? With enough repetition you made that happen!

But how does this apply to your life right now?

Say you are a procrastinator. The more you don’t procrastinate, the more you teach your brain not to wait for the last minute to make things happen.

Now, you might be thinking “Duh, if only not procrastinating could be that easy!”

Well, it can be. By doing something really small, that you wouldn’t normally do, but is in the direction of getting that task done, you will start creating those new precious neural pathways.

So if you have been postponing organizing your desk, just take one paper and put in its right place. Or, you can go even smaller. Look at one piece of paper and decide where to put it: Trash? Right cabinet? Another room? Give it to someone?

You don’t actually need to clean up that paper; you only need to decide what you need to do with it.

That’s how small you can start. And yet, those neural pathways are still being built. Gradually, you will transform yourself from a procrastinator to an in-the-moment action taker.

3. Learn something new

It might sound obvious, but the more you use your brain, the better its going to perform for you.

Advertising

For example, learning a new instrument improves your skill of translating something you see (sheet music) to something you actually do (playing the instrument).

Learning a new language exposes your brain to a different way of thinking, a different way of expressing yourself.

You can even literally take it a step further, and learn how to dance. Studies indicate that learning to dance helps seniors avoid Alzheimer’s. Not bad, huh?

4. Follow a brain training program

The Internet world can help you improve your brain function while lazily sitting on your couch. A clinically proven program like BrainHQ can help you improve your memory, or think faster, by just following their brain training exercises.

5. Work your body

You knew this one was coming didn’t you? Yes indeed, exercise does not just work your body; it also improves the fitness of your brain.

Even briefly exercising for 20 minutes facilitates information processing and memory functions. But it’s not just that–exercise actually helps your brain create those new neural connections faster. You will learn faster, your alertness level will increase, and you get all that by moving your body.

Now, if you are not already a regular exerciser, and already feel guilty that you are not helping your brain by exercising more, try a brain training exercise program like Exercise Bliss.

Remember, just like we discussed in #2, by training your brain to do something new repeatedly, you are actually changing yourself permanently.

6. Spend time with your loved ones

If you want optimal cognitive abilities, then you’ve got to have meaningful relationships in your life.  Talking with others and engaging with your loved ones helps you think more clearly, and it can also lift your mood.

Advertising

If you are an extrovert, this holds even more weight for you. At a class at Stanford University, I learned that extroverts actually use talking to other people as a way to understand and process their own thoughts.

I remember that the teacher told us that after a personality test said she was an extrovert, she was surprised. She had always thought of herself as an introvert. But then, she realized how much talking to others helped her frame her own thoughts, so she accepted her new-found status as an extrovert.

7. Avoid crossword puzzles

Many of us, when we think of brain fitness, think of crossword puzzles. And it’s true–crossword puzzles do improve our fluency, yet studies show they are not enough by themselves.

Are they fun? Yes. Do they sharpen your brain? Not really.

Of course, if you are doing this for fun, then by all means go ahead. If you are doing it for brain fitness, then you might want to choose another activity

8. Eat right – and make sure dark chocolate is included

Foods like fish, fruits, and vegetables help your brain perform optimally. Yet, you might not know that dark chocolate gives your brain a good boost as well.

When you eat chocolate, your brain produces dopamine. And dopamine helps you learn faster and remember better. Not to mention, chocolate contains flavonols, antioxidants, which also improve your brain functions.

So next time you have something difficult to do, make sure you grab a bite or two of dark chocolate!

The bottom line

Now that you know how to train your brain, it’s actually time to start doing.

Don’t just consume this content and then go on with your life as if nothing has changed. Put this knowledge into action and become smarter than ever!

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

Read Next