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14 Tips to Help You Build More Confidence

14 Tips to Help You Build More Confidence

We’re all victims of occasional bouts of self-doubt, even the most successful, charismatic, confident among us have their moments of insecurity. Self-confidence can be a very delicate and complex thing. A few are born with it; others learn it early on and the rest of us have to learn to build it on our own.

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    Our confidence plays an important role in ability to achieve success and happiness. It affects our mental thought patterns, the way we speak, the way we act, and the decisions we make in all areas of our lives – career, money, relationships, and even our health. Confident people take more action, perform better, and are more likely to attain their goals. In addition, confident people also know how to take more enjoyment from their accomplishments are happier in general.

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    Lucky for us, confidence can be built and strengthened until it becomes natural, just as any other habit. It simply takes a little time, some effort, and a bit of attention.

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    Confidence Building Tactics

    1. Fail More Often. The more challenges you take on, the more failures you’ll have, but learning that you can recover, get up and push forward builds confidence.
    2. Track your accomplishments. Keep a list of successes, big and small. It’ll help you to see your abilities in a more positive (and realistic) light.
    3. Don’t compare. Stop measuring yourself against others. What you see isn’t always real. Making comparisons is a damaging and an inaccurate measure of success anyway.
    4. Dress for confidence. How we dress affects both how we feel about ourselves and the way others perceive us. Expensive clothes aren’t necessary. Put emphasis on good fit, good condition, and appropriateness. Don’t be afraid of some color; black is professional, but color gets noticed.
    5. Work on your posture. People with lower confidence often tend to have poor posture. Stand up, sit up, and keep your head up. It’s an instant confidence booster.
    6. Learn. The more knowledge you acquire, the more confident you will be. Knowledge is power, and the more powerful you feel, the higher your confidence will be.
    7. Fitness. Better physical condition and appearance gives you more body confidence, and as a bonus, the extra endorphins give you an added energy boost.
    8. Start a conversation. When you find yourself in a social situation, instead of gravitating to those people you’re comfortable with, start a conversation with someone you don’t know very well. Eventually getting to know new people will become easier.
    9. Have miniature goals. Bite sized goals are easier and quicker to achieve and the momentum can give you a boost when attacking bigger goals.
    10. Raise your hand. Volunteer to take on tasks or projects that are a stretch for you. You’ll learn you can do more than you thought you could and so will others.
    11. Be around confident people. Cultivate relationships with “can-do” people; attitude is contagious. On the other hand, avoid “can’t do” people. It works both ways.
    12. Be your own friend. When you hear that voice in your head, abusing, attacking and belittling you, remind yourself that a friend wouldn’t talk to you in that manner.
    13. Rely on your instincts. When you trust your intuition, and listen to those gut feelings, you’ll become more confident in the knowledge that you do know what’s right for you.
    14. Keep practicing. Practice the skills you need to succeed. The more you practice, the more confident you become. This is true of every type of skill.

    Confidence helps you to be more secure in your abilities and more positive in your attitude. It also encourages you to be more assertive, to take on more challenges, and to improve your skills. As an added benefit, you’ll attract like-minded people. The end result is a better outlook, more success, and a higher quality of life in all areas.

    Featured photo credit: Boy jumping over the mountains via Shutterstock and inline photo by Sarah Reid via Flickr (CC BY 2.0)

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    More by this author

    Royale Scuderi

    A creative strategist, consultant and writer who specializes in cultivating human potential for happiness, health and fulfillment.

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    Last Updated on April 8, 2020

    Why Assuming Positive Intent Is an Amazing Productivity Driver

    Why Assuming Positive Intent Is an Amazing Productivity Driver

    Assuming positive intent is an important contributor to quality of life.

    Most people appreciate the dividends such a mindset produces in the realm of relationships. How can relationships flourish when you don’t assume intentions that may or may not be there? And how their partner can become an easier person to be around as a result of such a shift? Less appreciated in the GTD world, however, is the productivity aspect of this “assume positive intent” perspective.

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    Most of us are guilty of letting our minds get distracted, our energy sapped, or our harmony compromised by thinking about what others woulda, coulda, shoulda.  How we got wronged by someone else.  How a friend could have been more respectful.  How a family member could have been less selfish.

    However, once we evolve to understanding the folly of this mindset, we feel freer and we become more productive professionally due to the minimization of unhelpful, distracting thoughts.

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    The leap happens when we realize two things:

    1. The self serving benefit from giving others the benefit of the doubt.
    2. The logic inherent in the assumption that others either have many things going on in their lives paving the way for misunderstandings.

    Needless to say, this mindset does not mean that we ought to not confront people that are creating havoc in our world.  There are times when we need to call someone out for inflicting harm in our personal lives or the lives of others.

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    Indra Nooyi, Chairman and CEO of Pepsi, says it best in an interview with Fortune magazine:

    My father was an absolutely wonderful human being. From ecent emailhim I learned to always assume positive intent. Whatever anybody says or does, assume positive intent. You will be amazed at how your whole approach to a person or problem becomes very different. When you assume negative intent, you’re angry. If you take away that anger and assume positive intent, you will be amazed. Your emotional quotient goes up because you are no longer almost random in your response. You don’t get defensive. You don’t scream. You are trying to understand and listen because at your basic core you are saying, ‘Maybe they are saying something to me that I’m not hearing.’ So ‘assume positive intent’ has been a huge piece of advice for me.

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    In business, sometimes in the heat of the moment, people say things. You can either misconstrue what they’re saying and assume they are trying to put you down, or you can say, ‘Wait a minute. Let me really get behind what they are saying to understand whether they’re reacting because they’re hurt, upset, confused, or they don’t understand what it is I’ve asked them to do.’ If you react from a negative perspective – because you didn’t like the way they reacted – then it just becomes two negatives fighting each other. But when you assume positive intent, I think often what happens is the other person says, ‘Hey, wait a minute, maybe I’m wrong in reacting the way I do because this person is really making an effort.

    “Assume positive intent” is definitely a top quality of life’s best practice among the people I have met so far. The reasons are obvious. It will make you feel better, your relationships will thrive and it’s an approach more greatly aligned with reality.  But less understood is how such a shift in mindset brings your professional game to a different level.

    Not only does such a shift make you more likable to your colleagues, but it also unleashes your talents further through a more focused, less distracted mind.

    More Tips About Building Positive Relationships

    Featured photo credit: Christina @ wocintechchat.com via unsplash.com

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