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10 DANGER Signs You Are A Conformist

10 DANGER Signs You Are A Conformist

Massive success is reserved for independent thinkers who aren’t afraid to break rules that don’t fit their worldview. If you want to be happy and successful, watch out for these 10 danger signs you are a conformist.

1. You can’t think for yourself.

If you can’t answer a basic question without consulting another person or your favorite search engine, then you might be a conformist. Nonconformists are confident enough to speak their minds without seeking anybody else’s approval.

2. You wear different masks depending on who you’re with.

If your behavior and personality are influenced by who you are hanging out with, then you might be a conformist. It is natural to curse like a sailor in the presence of friends, while at the same time avoiding curse words in the presence of family or co-workers. This is acceptable, because there might be certain expressions you only feel comfortable saying to certain people. Nonconformists, however, know that performing a different routine for every single group of people they come across can quickly become exhausting.

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3. You pretend to like things to impress people.

If you think you can fake your way into a relationship, then you might be a conformist. Having a mutual interest with another person can create common ground, opening the door for a friendship to blossom, but this growth process can only happen if it occurs in an atmosphere of honesty and openness. Nonconformists roll their eyes at phony people who proclaim, “Oh yeah, I love that song!” when it is clear that they haven’t really heard it and are only saying that in a misguided effort to impress others.

4. You don’t buy clothes based on your personal preference.

If your wardrobe decisions are entirely based on seasonal styles, then you might be a conformist. There is nothing wrong with wanting to look good and feel handsome or sexy in your attire, but you shouldn’t abandon your unique tastes for whatever happens to be “in style” this year.

5. You follow a religion because your parents told you to.

If you pray to a God or Goddess for no other reason than, “My parents told me to,” or, “That’s just how it is around here,” then you might be a conformist. Don’t misread me: faith can be a beautiful thing when it is a personal decision between a believer and the Creator that he or she chooses to believe in. A lot of folks, however, don’t go to church or follow a religion because it is something they actually believe… they go, because they’re afraid of what everybody will think about them if they don’t.

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6. You vote for whoever your favorite pundit says you should.

If you vote for whoever Rush Limbaugh or Bill Mahler say you should without analyzing the issues for yourself, then you might be a conformist. I personally have a severe dislike of pundits of any political spectrum, because they are nothing but talking heads who distract us from the issues that really matter, so it blows my mind that any person would vote for a politician just because they “said so.” Nonconformists don’t let other people make their decisions for them; they make their own decisions.

7. You won’t confront bullies or wrongdoers.

If you see a person in your school or office get bullied and stare at the ground as if there is “nothing to see here,” then you might be a conformist. Bullying should never be tolerated. Your silence is a green-light for the bully to continue putting down others. Be confident enough to speak up for people who you witness being put down, insulted or made fun of. Nonconformists aren’t afraid of confrontations with bullies, because they are willing and able to be the change they want to see in their social circles.

8. You say things like, “That’s just the way things are.”

If you think self-defeating thoughts like, “I’ll never make a difference,” or, “Why bother? That’s just the way things are,” then you might be a conformist. And before you play the, “But I’m just one person!” card, remember that countless individuals like Martin Luther King Jr., Gandhi, Rosa Parks and Mother Teresa have accomplished more in their lifetimes than any government or elected body ever could. Nonconformists know that just because something is the way it is, doesn’t mean it is right, and they had the guts to stand up for themselves and say so.

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9. You’re afraid of what society thinks.

If you make important decisions based on what “society” thinks, then you might be a conformist. It is human nature to want other people to like and accept us, but making life-changing decisions based on popular opinion (instead of your personal belief) will not make you happy or fulfilled. Nonconformists know Mark Twain was right when he said, “Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”

10. You get all your news from a single source.

If you are deluded enough to think your cherished media outlet of choice is free of personal bias, then you might be a conformist. Nonconformists are aware that humans are inherently flawed beings who can’t keep their opinions to themselves. So it is silly to expect any newspaper or television station to be 100% unbiased. Journalists, editors and talking heads are ruled by their prejudices just like the rest of us, and it is delusional to think otherwise.

If you would like to test this final theory from these signs you are a conformist, perform a thought-experiment by paying attention to the most popular breaking headlines at a few different media outlets over the course of about a week. You could follow the news cycle at places like CNN, MSNBC, Fox Newsthe Wall Street Journal, Huffington Post, Salon, First Look Media, and the Guardian. You should notice that certain “Breaking News” stories receive constant coverage at some outlets, while not receiving as much as a mention at others. The only way to stay informed about the world is to cast a wide net, collecting information from several places; because if you put your faith in any single media outlet, you will be doomed to be a sheep forever.

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Featured photo credit: Sheep/Peter aka anemoneprojectors via flickr.com

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Daniel Wallen

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

How to Stay Calm and Cool When You Are Extremely Stressful

How to Stay Calm and Cool When You Are Extremely Stressful

Being in a hurry all the time drains your energy. Your work and routine life make you feel overwhelmed. Getting caught up in things beyond your control stresses you out…

If you’d like to stay calm and cool in stressful situations, put the following 8 steps into practice:

1. Breathe

The next time you’re faced with a stressful situation that makes you want to hurry, stop what you’re doing for one minute and perform the following steps:

  • Take five deep breaths in and out (your belly should come forward with each inhale).
  • Imagine all that stress leaving your body with each exhale.
  • Smile. Fake it if you have to. It’s pretty hard to stay grumpy with a goofy grin on your face.

Feel free to repeat the above steps every few hours at work or home if you need to.

2. Loosen up

After your breathing session, perform a quick body scan to identify any areas that are tight or tense. Clenched jaw? Rounded shoulders? Anything else that isn’t at ease?

Gently touch or massage any of your body parts that are under tension to encourage total relaxation. It might help to imagine you’re in a place that calms you: a beach, hot tub, or nature trail, for example.

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3. Chew slowly

Slow down at the dinner table if you want to learn to be patient and lose weight. Shoveling your food down as fast as you can is a surefire way to eat more than you need to (and find yourself with a bellyache).

Be a mindful eater who pays attention to the taste, texture, and aroma of every dish. Chew slowly while you try to guess all of the ingredients that were used to prepare your dish.

Chewing slowly will also reduce those dreadful late-night cravings that sneak up on you after work.

4. Let go

Cliche as it sounds, it’s very effective.

The thing that seems like the end of the world right now?

It’s not. Promise.

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Stressing and worrying about the situation you’re in won’t do any good because you’re already in it, so just let it go.

Letting go isn’t easy, so here’s a guide to help you:

21 Things To Do When You Find It Hard To Let Go

5. Enjoy the journey

Focusing on the end result can quickly become exhausting. Chasing a bold, audacious goal that’s going to require a lot of time and patience? Split it into several mini-goals so you’ll have several causes for celebration.

Stop focusing on the negative thoughts. Giving yourself consistent positive feedback will help you grow patience, stay encouraged, and find more joy in the process of achieving your goals.

6. Look at the big picture

The next time you find your stress level skyrocketing, take a deep breath, and ask yourself:

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Will this matter to me…

  • Next week?
  • Next month?
  • Next year?
  • In 10 years?

Hint: No, it won’t.

I bet most of the stuff that stresses you wouldn’t matter the next week, maybe not even the next day.

Stop agonizing over things you can’t control because you’re only hurting yourself.

7. Stop demanding perfection of yourself

You’re not perfect and that’s okay. Show me a person who claims to be perfect and I’ll show you a dirty liar.

Demanding perfection of yourself (or anybody else) will only stress you out because it just isn’t possible.

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8. Practice patience every day

Below are a few easy ways you can practice patience every day, increasing your ability to remain calm and cool in times of stress:

  • The next time you go to the grocery store, get in the longest line.
  • Instead of going through the drive-thru at your bank, go inside.
  • Take a long walk through a secluded park or trail.

Final thoughts

Staying calm in stressful situations is possible, all you need is some daily practice.

Taking deep breaths and eat mindfully are some simple ways to train your brain to be more patient. But changing the way you think of a situation and staying positive are most important in keeping cool whenever you feel overwhelmed and stressful.

Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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