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Why Motivation Could Be the Most Damaging Thing in Your Quest for Success

Why Motivation Could Be the Most Damaging Thing in Your Quest for Success

“Motivation? Damaging? Is this guy serious?” I hear you ask.

Before you slam down your coffee cup in outrage, answer these questions for me (then if you wish, slam it down with all your might):

If motivation is the answer, then why are you continuing with all the habits that have proven harmful to you in the past?

If motivation is the answer, then how is it that after reading all the books, listening to all the audios and attending all the life-changing seminars, you are still no closer to success than you had hoped?

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While now is a good time to ponder the answers to those questions, I’ll probably lose you if you do. So stick with me for now, and save your self-examination for later on.

Why Motivation Can Be Damaging

What I’m getting at here is that motivation is not key to your success. Motivation is often used incorrectly and gets relied upon just like an illegal drug—as a pick-me-up, something to ingest for some much-needed energy. The effects are short lived, and just like many other drugs, you find yourself searching for it more and more. It does not supply you with a constant source of energy and you can be sure that after every high point there will be a low.

So if motivation is not the key, then what is the best way to stay focused and hit those goals that you desire the most?

Well, before I reveal all, let me tell you that I was once a slave to motivation, reading all the books, listening to all the audios, and I probably even sat next to you at the seminars. But I quickly came to realize that I wasn’t moving forward. One step forward but two steps back was the familiar dance I was performing all too frequently. So I decided to get to the bottom of it.

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Why Wasn’t Motivation Getting Me Where I Wanted to Be?

The answer was ‘connection.’ My connection to things that I thought were important to me wasn’t strong enough for me to pursue them. I just used various means of motivation to try and pull me through.

You are no doubt doing the same!

Motivation will be required when you don’t have a strong enough ‘why’ behind the things that you are doing. If you have a strong enough why—a real, meaningful reason for you to be doing exactly what it is you are doing—then you are more likely to stick to the plan, get the results you desire and begin to experience success, all without the need of motivation.

The more you lean on motivation, the less clarity you have around your goals, your dreams and desires. Once you get to the true core of what it is you want, then you will find that inner motivation to be your driving force.

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Finding Your Inner Motivation

I want you to think about how motivation is serving you right now.

For every mini goal you have, whether it be business, family, or personal, ask yourself these three questions to help you decide whether those goals really mean what you say they mean:

1. Why do I truly and honestly want to achieve this goal?

2. Does it mean as much to me as I say it does?

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3. How much better would my life be if I was to achieve this?

Once you’ve answered those questions for each and every goal you’ve set yourself, you will come to a realization of the worth of each, and only then will you know how each serves you best. If you find it’s the very thing you want in your life right now, then the motivation will be provided from deep within your soul. You’ll feel it upon waking every morning.

Featured photo credit: Motivation. Not all it’s cracked up to be? via

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Last Updated on June 26, 2020

10 Things To Remember When Everything Goes Wrong

10 Things To Remember When Everything Goes Wrong

Problems and heartaches in life are inevitable. However, there are some things to remember when you’re right in the thick of it that can help you get through it. When everything seems to be going wrong, practice telling yourself these things.

1. This Too Shall Pass

Sometimes life’s rough patches feel like they’re going to last forever. Whether you’re dealing with work-related issues, family problems, or stressful situations, very few problems last for a lifetime. So remind yourself, that things won’t be this bad forever.

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2. Some Things are Going Right

When things are going wrong, it’s hard to recognize what is going right. It’s easy to screen out the good things and only focus on the bad things. Remind yourself that some things are going right. Purposely look for the positive, even if it is something very small.

3. I Have Some Control

One of the most most important things to remember is that you have some control of the situation. Even if you aren’t in complete control of the situation, one thing you can always control is your attitude and reaction. Focus on managing what is within your control.

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4. I Can Ask for Help

Asking for help can be hard sometimes. However, it’s one of the best ways to deal with tough situations. Tell people what you need specifically if they offer to help. Don’t be afraid to call on friends and family and ask them for help, whether you need financial assistance, emotional support, or practical help.

5. Much of This Won’t Matter in a Few Years

Most of the problems we worry about today won’t actually matter five years from now. Remind yourself that whatever is going wrong now is only a small percentage of your actual life. Even if you’re dealing with a major problem, like a loved one’s illness, remember that a lot of good things are likely to happen in the course of a year or two as well.

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6. I Can Handle This

A lack of confidence in handling tough times can add to stress. One of the best things to remember is that you can handle tough situations. Even though you might feel angry, hurt, disappointed, or sad, it won’t kill you. You can get through it.

7. Something Good Will Come Out of This

No matter how bad a situation is, it’s almost certain that something good will come out of it. At the very least, it’s likely that you will learn a life lesson. Perhaps you learn not to repeat the same mistake in the future or maybe you move on from a bad situation and find something better. Look for the one good thing that can result when bad things happen.

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8. I Can Accept What’s Out of my Control

There are many things that aren’t within your control. You can’t change the past, another person’s behavior, or a loved one’s health issues. Don’t waste time trying to force others to change or trying to make things be different if it isn’t within your control. Investing time and energy into trying to things you can’t will cause you to feel helpless and exhausted. Acceptance is one of the best way to establish resilience.

9. I Have Overcome Past Difficulties

One of the things to remember when you’re facing difficulties, is that you’ve handled problems in the past. Don’t overlook past difficulties that you’ve dealt with successfully. Remind yourself of all the past problems you’ve overcome and you’ll gain confidence in dealing with the current issues.

10. I Need to Take Care of Myself

When everything seems to be going wrong, take care of yourself. Get plenty of rest, get some exercise, eat healthy, and spend some time doing leisure activities. When you’re taking better care of yourself you’ll be better equipped to deal with your problems.

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Featured photo credit: NeONBRAND via unsplash.com

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