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When You Start Being Yourself, These 15 Amazing Things Will Happen

When You Start Being Yourself, These 15 Amazing Things Will Happen

I never used to be who I really was. I used to pretend. I used to put on a show. I used to put on a mask. I used to try and be who I thought others wanted me to be. I think everyone’s been here at some point in their lives, and I’m sure we can all agree that it’s not much fun. When I started being myself, it was one of the best things that had ever happened to me. I couldn’t have imagined the changes it would make in my life. Looking back on it, some of the below are obvious, and some less so. So, what will happen when you finally start being yourself?

1. You’ll have more fun

I smile more. I laugh more. I play more jokes. I’m creative. I’m crazy. Life’s just better.

2. You’ll care less about what others think

My decisions are my business. No one else’s. I make them and I have to live with the consequences. I’ve learned the hard way that if you try to make others happy at your own expense, surprise surprise, it doesn’t make you happy.

3. You’ll know what you want

At the very least, I know what direction to go in. As the dialogue from Alice in Wonderland goes:

“Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?”

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“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.”

“I don’t much care where –”

“Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.”

4. You’ll make decisions with ease

I know what’s important to me. I know what’s more important and less important. It’s quite difficult to not make decisions when you know this stuff.

5. You’ll be more respected

I was more honest and more forthcoming with my opinion and people respected that, even if they didn’t like it. I wasn’t afraid to act like who I really was and, again, if people didn’t like it, they sure respected it.

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6. You’ll respect yourself more

This was a bit of a surprise in a way. More because I didn’t know that when I wasn’t being myself I didn’t have a whole lot of respect for myself. And why would I? If, deep down, I knew who I really was and yet wasn’t acting like it, how could I respect myself?

7. You won’t doubt yourself

This is not to say that I think everything is going to always and forever work out fantastically. It’s more that I’m happy with my decisions and so I can live with the consequences, whatever they might be.

8. You’ll love you some you

It’s really hard not to when you’re being yourself and having fun and are happy. It’s just an awesome feeling when you start being yourself, and “I love me some me” sums that up pretty well. It’s not arrogance. It’s knowing you deserve to love who you are.

9. You’ll dream big

I know who I am. I’m confident in who I am. I know what direction to go in. Do I know I can achieve all of my wildest dreams? No. How could I? But am I scared to try? Hell no. The time to act is now. It always is.

10. You’ll want to grow

I’ve been interested in learning and growing and developing for the last 8 years. My passion for it increased over time and was especially intense when I was on the edge of finding out (admitting?) who I really was. Now I want to grow more broadly. I want to learn about life. About business. About money. About relationships. And, when you do this, you can’t help but grow personally. Win win.

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11. You’ll feel proud of yourself

It’s not always easy. Like anything worthwhile. It’s easy to be dragged along in life without ever really taking control. For me, that’s no way to live. I want to take control. I want to create my own life. So every time I make a choice that empowers me, that creates something, that the real me would make… I’m proud.

12. Your thoughts will become actions

Thoughts aren’t real. Thinking about something doesn’t make it happen. You have to actually stand up and do something. It’s blindingly obvious, but it’s a truth I rarely paid attention to. When it came to creating the life I really wanted, anyway. I’d always say “yeah, one day.” And I’d think about it. Daydream about it. Wish for it. But never do anything.

Now I’m just being me, I act. I do. I make things happen. I know what I want and I’m decisive. Why wouldn’t I do? What would I be waiting for?

13. You’ll be more relaxed

“Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.”

I love that quote. And I believe in it. I used to worry a lot and I think this is why.

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14. You’ll inspire people

“You’ve also kind of been an inspiration for me, as a lot of what you’ve said over the past 6ish months has really struck a chord with me and made me think loads about what it is I want from life. So, thank you. Just for being you :)”

This was in an email I received after a girl I worked with had decided to quit and go do what she really wanted. I was ecstatic. I’d essentially helped someone by accident, but it felt amazing. This one isn’t about bragging. It’s about saying that when you start being yourself, people notice. Everyone wants to be who they really are so it’s difficult for people to not be inspired when they see someone who’s doing it right in front of them. I’ve been inspired the same way plenty of times in my life. I hope that continues and I hope I can continue to inspire others.

15. You’ll be happy

This might be the most important one. I was being myself and I was happy because of it. Does anything else really matter?

Featured photo credit: Len Matthews via flickr.com

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Last Updated on July 16, 2019

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

Negativity affects ourselves and everyone around us. It limits our potential to become something great and live a fulfilling, purposeful life. Negativity has a tangible effect on our health, too. Research has shown that people who cultivate negative energy experience more stress, more sickness, and less opportunity over the course of their lives than those who choose to live positively.

When we make a decision to become positive, and follow that decision up with action, we will begin to encounter situations and people that are also positive. The negative energy gets edged out by all positive experiences. It’s a snowball effect.

Although negative and positive thoughts will always exist, the key to becoming positive is to limit the amount of negativity that we experience by filling ourselves up with more positivity.

Here are some ways to get rid of negativity and become more positive.

1. Become Grateful for Everything

When life is all about us, it’s easy to believe that we deserve what we have. An attitude of entitlement puts us at the center of the universe and sets up the unrealistic expectation that others should cater to us, our needs, and our wants. This vain state of existence is a surefire way to set yourself up for an unfulfilled life of negativity.

People living in this sort of entitlement are “energy suckers”–they are always searching for what they can get out of a situation. People that don’t appreciate the nuances of their lives live in a constant state of lacking. And it’s really difficult to live a positive life this way.

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When we begin to be grateful and appreciate everything in our lives–from the small struggles that make us better, to the car that gets us from A to B every day–we shift our attitude from one of selfishness, to one of appreciation. This appreciation gets noticed by others, and a positive harmony begins to form in our relationships.

We begin to receive more of that which we are grateful for, because we’ve opened ourselves up to the idea of receiving, instead of taking. This will make your life more fulfilling, and more positive.

2. Laugh More, Especially at Yourself

Life gets busy, our schedules fill up, we get into relationships, and work can feel task oriented and routine-driven at times. Being human can feel more like being a robot. But having this work-driven, serious attitude often results in negative and performance oriented thinking.

Becoming positive means taking life less seriously and letting yourself off the hook. This is the only life that you get to live, why not lighten up your mood?

Laughter helps us become positive by lightening our mood and reminding us not to take life so seriously. Are you sensitive to light sarcasm? Do you have trouble laughing at jokes? Usually, people who are stressed out and overly serious get most offended by sarcasm because their life is all work and no play.

If we can learn to laugh at ourselves and our mistakes, life will become more of an experiment in finding out what makes us happy. And finding happiness means finding positivity.

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3. Help Others

Negativity goes hand in hand with selfishness. People that live only for themselves have no higher purpose in their lives. If the whole point of this world is only to take care of yourself and no one else, the road to a long-term fulfillment and purpose is going to be a long one.

Positivity accompanies purpose. The most basic way to create purpose and positivity in your life is to begin doing things for others. Start small; open the door for the person in front of you at Starbucks or ask someone how their day was before telling them about yours.

Helping others will give you an intangible sense of value that will translate into positivity. And people might just appreciate you in the process.

4. Change Your Thinking

We can either be our best coach or our best enemy. Change starts from within. If you want to become more positive, change the wording of your thoughts. We are the hardest on ourselves, and a stream of negative self talk is corrosive to a positive life.

The next time you have a negative thought, write it down and rephrase it with a positive spin. For example, change a thought like, “I can’t believe I did so horribly on the test–I suck.” to “I didn’t do as well as I hoped to on this test. But I know I’m capable and I’ll do better next time.”

Changing our self-talk is powerful.

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5. Surround Yourself with Positive People

We become most like the people that we surround ourselves with. If our friend group is full of negative energy-suckers and drama queens, we will emulate that behavior and become like them. It is very difficult to become more positive when the people around us don’t support or demonstrate positive behavior.

As you become more positive, you’ll find that your existing friends will either appreciate the new you or they will become resistant to your positive changes. This is a natural response.

Change is scary; but cutting out the negative people in your life is a huge step to becoming more positive. Positive people reflect and bounce their perspectives onto one another. Positivity is a step-by-step process when you do it solo, but a positive group of friends can be an escalator.

6. Get into Action

Negative thoughts can be overwhelming and challenging to navigate. Negativity is usually accompanied by a “freak-out” response, especially when tied to relationships, people and to worrying about the future. This is debilitating to becoming positive and usually snowballs into more worry, more stress and more freak-outs.

Turn the negative stress into positive action. The next time you’re in one of these situations, walk away and take a break. With your eyes closed, take a few deep breaths. Once you’re calm, approach the situation or problem with a pen and pad of paper. Write out four or five actions or solutions to begin solving the problem.

Taking yourself out of the emotionally charged negative by moving into the action-oriented positive will help you solve more problems rationally and live in positivity

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7. Take Full Responsibility, Stop Being the Victim

You are responsible for your thoughts.

People that consistently believe that things happen to them handicap themselves to a victim mentality. This is a subtle and deceptive negative thought pattern. Phrases like “I have to work” or “I can’t believe he did that to me” are indicators of a victim mentality. Blaming circumstances and blaming others only handicaps our decision to change something negative into something positive.

Taking full responsibility for your life, your thoughts and your actions is one of the biggest steps in creating a more positive life. We have unlimited potential within to create our own reality, change our life, and change our thoughts. When we begin to really internalize this, we discover that no one can make us feel or do anything. We choose our emotional and behavioral response to people and circumstances.

Make positive choices in favor of yourself.

“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny” ― Lao Tzu

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Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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